Forever and Always
by husmcn
Summary: Bella Swan fell entirely in love with her best friend, dreaming of forever with him. But what happens when everything doesn't go as well as she had planned? What if he broke her heart before they ever had a chance?
1. Forever & Always

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 1**_

_**Forever and Always**_

_Once upon a time I believe it was a Tuesday when I caught your eye  
We caught onto something, I hold on to the night  
You looked me in the eye and told me you loved me  
Were you just kidding cause it seems to me  
This thing is breaking down we almost never speak  
I don't feel welcome anymore, baby what happened please tell me  
Cause one second it was perfect and now you're half way out the door_

_And I stare at the phone and he still hasn't called  
And you feel so low you can't feel nothin at all  
And you flash back to when he said forever and always  
And it rains in your bedroom everything is wrong  
It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone  
Cause I was there when you said forever and always_

"Forever and Always" - Taylor Swift

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

Being at the young age of seventeen, you wouldn't think that love would mean more to you than just a simple word. You'd just think of it as something you'd go through, if you were lucky, when you were older. Say in your early twenties, if that. But at seventeen, to not only fall irrevocably in love with your perfect half, but to lose that one person just as your dreams were finally coming true, are enough to send you spiraling in pain for the rest of your life.

**~.~**

Forks, Washington was a tiny town, small population of people living within it. And those people were usually the same families who had earlier generations populating the same town years before. So, everyone knew everyone. It had its ups and downs, but Forks would always be home to me.

My mother and I came to Forks when I was 9 years old, her main motive in coming back to repair her relationship with my father. A father who she'd left when I was three after having a stupid argument with and walking out on. A father who I had never met in my entire life, and really had no idea was alive until my mother came to me a day before we left, telling me we were leaving. As any typical 9 year old, I was beyond pissed. I was losing my friends in Phoenix, whom I'd grown up with since I was a toddler. But in her opinion, this was for the best. Apparently I needed a father figure, as if I wasn't getting along well with just having one parent. So, harboring my feelings, I trailed behind my mother. It was possibly the first time in my life that I'd seen her act so responsible. Her carelessness and mid-life crisis had me really matured for my age. At 8, you would've thought I was a pre-teen. I'm telling you, cleaning after your mother everywhere she went, answering her phone calls and trying to explain to her boss that she had the stomach flu, keeping her away from work while not having a single clue where the hell she was made me grow up far too soon. I wished I could just be like any normal 9 year old, but it was never like that. And I knew it never would be like that.

Before I knew it, we were parked into the driveway of my father's home. Well, it'd probably be better to call it my new home, but it didn't feel like that yet. I'd give it time, but I wasn't all that sure. I looked up to my mom, seeing her fingers flex on the steering wheel as she gathered her nerves before opening her door quickly. Sighing, I opened mine and saw a tall man walk down the steps. He looked familiar, but I assumed as much. I was young when I'd last seen him, but not young enough to completely forgot about him. He walked up to me as I put my backpack around me and closed the car door, his dark moustache twitching as he stumbled with how to talk to me.

_Grownups._

I rolled my eyes and stuck out my hand. "Hi, I'm Isabella Swan. But you can call me Bella."

His eyes widened and jaw dropped a bit when he saw how forward I was being, and nervously stuck out his hand to shake mine. "I'm, uh, Charlie. Nice to see you again, kiddo."

"I'm not a kid." I huffed, placing my hands on my hips. Just because I was young, didn't mean I was a child. Hello, I _did_ say I was mature for my age.

"Isabella, enough!" My mom snapped at me, and I instantly stood up straight. Even though I did take care of her, she still terrified me. The constant drinking always had her angry, and I was almost always the target of her lashing. The only comforting thing about moving in with my father was the fact that maybe I would've been a bit safer from her this way. I wouldn't out her to my father, which was why I wore long sleeves and pants even in the hot summer heat. That way, no one would see the marks on my body. I would be safe.

_I hope_.

"Renee." My father looked directly at my mom, the angry look in his eyes mimicking just as hers had been with me. When she looked back at him, her eyes softened and she grinned at him.

"Charlie. You haven't changed one bit," She teased, trying to soften him up a bit with being her charming self, but for once, it had no effect on this man. Men would usually grovel at her feet, what with her beautiful olive skin and golden brown hair, cheekbones fit for a model and bright brown eyes. But this man, this Charlie character, was apparently immune to it.

"Go on inside. I'll grab your bags," He dismissed her, walking by to the trunk of our Jeep and pulling out the few bags that we had. Well, more like the few bags that my mother had. There was only about half of one suitcase filled with my clothes, other than my belongings in my backpack. The other two large ones were my mother's. I was never treated like her child, but rather an extra weight on her life, so she did barely anything for me. That included feeding me, dressing me, and taking care of me at all. I was more like her servant than daughter.

I walked up to the house quickly, a little bit excited to see how everything looked like. My eyes darted around to the living room, kitchen and dining room, the warm feeling of a real home already getting to me. And all too soon, I felt a strong hand grab my shoulder and whip me back to the ground. I landed on my butt, wincing at the pain that went through my body. I was about to stand back up before my mother's hand pushed me back to the ground and held me there.

"Are you stupid, or have you completely forgotten how you were raised Isabella?" She growled, her fingers digging into my shoulder. I bit my lip to hold myself from crying in front of her, which would only make her hurt me even more. "Don't you even think that you can do whatever the fuck you want just because your daddy is here. You know what'll happen then. Do you understand me?"

I nodded my head quickly, wanting her to take her hand off of me before I lost all feeling in my arm. Her eyes narrowed before she pulled away and walked into the kitchen. As I was getting up, rubbing my shoulder to get rid of some of the pain, I heard footsteps coming into the house.

"Hey, are you alright? Here, let me help you." Charlie walked up and helped me up, looking at me worriedly as he looked me over to see if I was alright. I began to panic, hoping he wouldn't see any of my skin that I was trying to cover from him.

My mother walked out of the kitchen, narrowing her eyes at me once more before looking to my father. "The kid's clumsy. She can walk it out."

He asked again if I was alright and I nodded my head slowly, biting my tongue because I wanted to tell him to back off. I was fine, but having my mom around was making me uncomfortable. I was used to being my own self, especially with her gone most of the time. But with her surrounding me now, I had to watch what I said and when all the time. I had already screwed up twice in the last five minutes, and look where it'd got me. I had to be more careful.

Charlie had ordered pizza for us, explaining that he couldn't cook for the life of him. His was the Chief of Police in Forks, so he was working a lot. But he assured me that, now that I was here, he was going to spend as much time with me as he could. And as hard as it was for me to get used to everything here, I started to really like him. He always smiled at me, complimented me when I would say something, those very few times that I had. I knew that he cared for me, and with how he made me feel, I knew I could too. Someday. We were just finishing up before the doorbell rang, Charlie getting up to open it. I turned around to look at the door, seeing an older brunette woman standing there with a small little girl beside her. She looked like she was my age, but I thought her hair was weird. I mean, weren't girls supposed to have long hair? That's what I thought, but hers was super short, just reaching her chin and her bangs pinned to the side. It looked a little boyish, other than the pin, but she was one of the prettiest girls I had seen. None of my friends from Phoenix looked like her. The girl saw me looking at her, her eyes shining and lips widening in her biggest smile and waved at me. I didn't want to be rude, so I half-waved back. I was trying to listen to what Charlie was saying to them before I felt a sharp pain in my arm.

"I've had enough of your fuck ups, Isabella. Sit properly and ignore the bitch and kid at the door. No one addressed you, so you don't do the same. Got it?" My mother was furious, glaring at me with her nostrils flared. I was scared, opening my mouth to speak but no sound would come out. She reached up and pulled my hair, making my head twitch to the side as she pulled harshly. "Answer me when I'm talking to you."

I nodded my head quickly, as well as I could with her still gripping my hair. "Yes. Yes, I understand."

Charlie walked in before my mother could say anything else and she immediately pulled her hand away, smiling largely at him. "Bella, I'd like you to meet Esme Cullen. She used to be friends with your mom back when you were still a baby. And this is her daughter, Alice."

Alice looked straight at me, still smiling and waved again. "Hi! Wanna be best friends?"

I shifted uncomfortably, still recovering from my mother's attack and wondering how to react to the little girl. Every move, every word spoken was new to me all over again. I didn't want her to hurt me, but I knew if I kept quiet that would make her mad too. "I, uhm – "

"Alice Brandon Cullen, what have I told you about being so forward? Give her time, you're scaring the poor thing," Esme scolded her daughter, but unlike my mother, there was still warmth in it. She was teasing her, but being firm at the same time. Esme turned to me, a soft smile lighting up her face. "Hello, sweetheart. You've grown up to be a beautiful, young girl."

"Um, thank you," I said softly, trying to smile and make an impression on her. I saw the concern in her eyes already, but it was expected. But what was I supposed to do? Tell everyone that my mother was really a complete psycho, who charmed her way through everything but beat me like I was a toy? No, I couldn't. I couldn't imagine what my mother would do to me if I did.

"Mom, can me and Bella be best friends _now_?" Alice whined from beside her, making me smile for real this time. No, she was nothing like my Phoenix friends, but I liked her already.

"Bella and _I_, sweetheart. And as long as her parents are fine with it, you two can go play on your swing set."

I looked to my frowning mother, who was about to open her mouth and say no before my father said it was fine. She snapped her head at him, but he shut her up quickly. "They live right across the street Renee, it's fine. And it'll give us time to talk alone." She scowled up at Esme, who only grinned smugly at her and slumped back into her seat.

Alice grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. We walked a few blocks hand in hand as she spurted off her life story to me. Apparently we were the same age and would be going to the same school the week after, which I was definitely happy about. She walked up to her house, which was a bit bigger than Charlie's, and went around the backyard. Her backyard, on the other hand, was bigger than our house in Phoenix. It looked like a playground. There were slides and a trampoline, making me excited already just looking at it. She saw me staring at the trampoline and gripped my hand again, helping me up as we jumped on it over and over again.

Alice had me in hysterics, falling on her butt when I'd land hard on the trampoline. We'd fall down at the same time to see who would be pushed back up the highest. And we definitely hit each other more than enough times. It hurt, but our laughter made the pain go away.

We were on our sides, doubling up in laughter after I almost fell off of the trampoline when a boys voice boomed at us. "Alice! What did mom tell you about going on the trampoline by yourself? Oh, hi."

I looked up to the boy in front of me. He was pretty big, and definitely much older than I was. His short, dark hair curled up and he had his arms crossed around his chest. I thought he was kind of cute, actually. I never thought much for boys, but my mind was slowly changing. Especially after seeing him there. I smiled at him and waved, about to introduce myself before Alice interrupted.

"This is Bella Swan. She's Charlie's daughter, and she just moved back to Forks. She's from Phoenix, and she's really pretty. And funny. She's my best friend," Alice rambled, barely fitting in a breath in between her explanation. I turned back to look at her with a dazed expression before looking back at the boy and started laughing again when I saw that he looked just like I was.

"Slow down, Al," He chuckled and waved back at me. "What's up? I'm Emmett. Alice's brother. Nice to meet you Bella."

"Same here." I smiled back at him, and sat up on the trampoline with Alice doing the same. "So, are we all going to the same school next week?"

"Nope. I'm in junior high. Eighth grade," He puffed his chest out a bit, obviously trying to look impressive.

_Boys and grownups. Two groups that I'll never understand._

"That's pretty cool, but you don't need to act so macho about it." I slapped my hand on my mouth quickly, realizing how rude that must've sounded. I really had to work on my control. And work on some censorship at it. Emmett's jaw dropped, but the side of his mouth started to twitch up in a smirk before we were interrupted by another boy's voice.

"Whoa! Better watch out with that one, Emmett." I leaned my body over to the direction of the voice, this time my own jaw dropping when the boy walked towards us. If I had said anything about not being all that interested in boys before, I totally change my mind. He looked like an angel, copper hair messed around like he rolled around in the grass, but it looked perfect. His eyes were green, like his siblings, but much brighter. He looked about my age, but there was just something about him. My mind was shouting off comebacks, but my body was in complete shock. He waved at me and smiled lopsidedly, making my heart do back flips like an NFL cheerleader.

"H, I'm Edward." His voice was just… _perfect_, making me gulp loudly. I was still gaping at him when his brows furrowed and he let his hand fall back to his side before stepping closer to me. "Hey, are you alright?"

I shook my head and blinked hard a few times. "I'm Bella, and yeah, I'm fine."

If only I knew how completely wrong I was. But at that moment, I knew that there was more to Edward than what I had seen at our first meeting. If I didn't know any better, I would say that was the moment I fell in love with Edward Cullen.

**~.~**

I iced my ribs, wincing at the pain I felt. I was starting my first year in junior high the day after, and the last thing I wanted was to cover myself again so no one would see my bruises. My mother's mood with me had only worsened since we'd moved to Forks, but she wouldn't let that get away from making things right with my dad. I still didn't know why she pushed so hard to get into his good graces, but she kept pushing. He was still a little harsh with her and there was no affection between them at all. I didn't blame him. Hell, she was a crazy bitch. But all the same, I never told anyone about what she would do to me. I didn't even know what I did this time, but when she'd came home from work and seen that Charlie wasn't home yet for dinner, she went completely off on me. Her waitressing job wasn't as good as the pay she got from doing whatever, or whoever, in Phoenix. And apparently I was to blame. I didn't look too bad to cover up, other than my cut lip when she punched me. My ribs hurt like hell from those same punches, but the ice would help a little bit. I might as well have been a doctor by then, knowing how and when to treat myself. I raised my white tanktop a bit higher, putting the ice directly on my skin and sighing at the sensation. There were going to be some pretty nasty bruises on there, I knew that for sure. Charlie had gotten home a bit after Renee went off, and I told him I wasn't feeling well so I rushed up to my bedroom, locking the door as I did. Thankful for the joined bathroom to my own bedroom, I tended to myself. I wasn't sure how long I was in my bathroom for, leaning against the counter with one hand as the other kept the ice on me when I heard footsteps come into the bathroom.

"B, you have no idea what Jessica Stanley just said to me. I swear to God, she… what the hell happened to you?"

I dropped the ice into the sink, swearing under my breath at being caught. Edward had made it an often occurrence to climb up the tree outside my window and into my room whenever he pleased. And that's why I made sure to always change in my bedroom in case he dropped by. He still made me nervous and giddy when he was around, but it was never uncomfortable. Yes, I definitely had feelings for him, but I would never tell him that. That would just make it awkward.

But now, it couldn't get more awkward. His face was flaming as his eyes zoned in on my ribs, the bruises already showing. Not only that, but the healing bruises on my arms. My eyes darted between him and the ground, my mind completely blank. I didn't know what to say to him. I couldn't lie to him, but I was too scared to talk about what my mother did to me, and had been doing for years. He probably would've thought I was pathetic. Snarky, confident Bella to everyone else but pathetic, stupid girl behind closed doors.

No, I couldn't let that happen.

"It's nothing, I fell," I said, letting my lips turn up to a small smile before turning back to the mirror and looking back at my reflection. I had never felt so ill in my entire life. His footsteps came closer until I saw his face in the mirror, looking back at me. As Edward grew, he only got even more handsome. He was much taller now, his chiseled face more defined as well. And it didn't help that he was an avid sports player, what with having a big brother who was the same. Emmett made it a priority to have Edward playing whatever sport he could, coaching him in everything.

I felt his fingers softly touch my skin, and I gasped at the feeling. It felt like a surge of electricity went through me, with no pain from having touched my ribs but rather another sort of pain. But it was… _good_. Nothing I'd ever felt before in my entire life. I looked up at his reflection and saw him gulp, wondering if he felt it too. His eyes were locked to my side, his jaw tensed as he took deep breaths.

"Bells, what _happened_?" His pained voice and usage of his personal nickname for me brought tears to my eyes, and I bit my lip like I usually did when I didn't want to cry. It had been something I would do as a child when Renee would hit me, and it just stuck as I grew. I never cried anymore when Renee laid her hands on me. Hell, I barely ever cried at all. But right then, with Edward touching me so gently, it made my heart ache. My world shattered, and as I took a breath to try to calm myself, a sob erupted instead. I turned my head away from him, embarrassed, my tears falling down my cheeks. My shoulders shook slightly while I attempted to hold my sobs in. I felt Edward's hand hold my own, still cold from the ice, and another placed under my chin. He gently brought my face back to his, and when I looked back to his eyes, I couldn't hold my sobs in anymore.

"Edward, I'm… I can't…" I cried, letting myself hold onto him as he pulled me into his arms and rubbed his hands soothingly along my back, shushing me lovingly.

"It's okay, Bells. I'm here." He held me while I kept crying, my tears staining his tshirt but he didn't care. He just held me and whispered into my ear that it would be alright. And I believed him. Anything Edward told me, I would believe him. It was always how it was.

I wasn't sure how long he had held, but it felt like a really long time. I sniffed and tried to pull away from him, telling him I was fine but he wouldn't let me go. He was holding me as tight as he could without hurting me. I knew I looked fragile to him now after seeing my marked body, and that was the last thing I wanted him to see me as, but I couldn't bring myself to let him go. After a few moments, he finally broke the silence.

"Was it Renee?"

I tensed immediately, frozen completely as he asked me what I knew he had already found out. There was no need for me to deny it. With the way he asked me, he already had his answer. Edward knew more about me than I knew myself, seeing through me and helping me find my way when I was lost. And that's exactly what he did that night.

I sighed softly and snuggled into his chest more, nodding to answer him.

I would never let him go.

**~.~**

"Thanks for the ride, Alice!" I leaned over into the passenger side window and smiled at my best friend behind the wheel before heading into my house. Even at seventeen, Alice still looked like she did when she was a kid. Don't get me wrong, the girl filled the curves in all the right places, but she was still short and donning that wicked hairstyle of hers. The annoying girls at Forks High had tried to pull it off, but with no luck. There was only one Alice hairstyle that looked good, and that was on her. Esme and Carlisle had bought her a slick, black Mercedes for her birthday. It was barely pocket change for them now, considering Carlisle had been promoted at the hospital. He basically ran the entire place, and Esme was more than successful at her interior decorating gig. The only downside of everything was that they had moved from living down the street to living into a secluded area in Forks, which made them farther from me. But Alice and I hung out at school and after as well, so it wasn't too bad. And if she didn't drive down, I'd drive to her place with Big Red, the old pick up my dad had fixed up for me for my seventeenth birthday. It wasn't the best working truck I'd seen, but it brought me from point A to point B. And I wasn't picky. The fact that Charlie had gone and done that for me was more than perfect. Our relationship had gotten much better over the years, and we were inseparable. Although, that didn't work very well with Renee, who seemed to just get even bitterer through the years.

Luckily for me, since the night Edward had seen my bruises, he didn't tell. He kept my secret, though he was more than angry when I told him he couldn't tell. He wanted to understand, but he thought that I was being too good to Renee by not acting. But I couldn't do it. In the beginning, I kept quiet so she could finally make things right with my dad. But now, I didn't know why my mouth was shut. Yes, I was still scared like a little kid, but damn, I could've done _something_. Up and until the night the Cullens had moved, Edward would come up to my bedroom and help tend whatever new injuries I would have. We wouldn't speak a word while he cleaned me up, just staring at each other when we did. As I grew older, I found the whole exchange so intimate, but I couldn't let my feelings for Edward get in the way of anything. I wanted nothing more than to be with Edward, but I couldn't. And plus, Edward and I were friends. And with friends, comes with sharing all of your secrets. Edward never did tell me about hooking up with the girls at Forks High, but I always heard the rumours from the girls. They were all jealous of how close Edward and I were, but I never let that bother me. Plus, they knew better than to try to get off on me. All the anger I harbored against my mother would be unleashed if anyone even did as much as snap at me. I didn't give a shit who was around me, be it a parent or a teacher, I went insane. It only happened a few times before they learned their lesson, but luckily, Edward was always there to calm me down before things worsened. I think the worst it had ever gotten was me punching Jessica Stanley, giving her a black eye, after I had heard her rambling to her skanky friends in the washroom about sucking Edward's dick the night before. I told her she was wrong, that he was with me at the exact time she had said, and she just started spewing insults at me. She was way too overdramatic, so her yells and screams were heard from outside the washroom doors. Just as my fist collided with her face, I felt two arms pull me away and out of the washroom. Edward brought me outside, sat me in his silver Volvo, and waited until I calmed down before hugging me tightly. Those were the small things that Edward did for me that made me fall in love with him even more.

Pathetic, right? Not only do I have a psychotic, crazy bitch of a mother who beats the shit out of me every single day, but I'm completely head over heels in love with my best friend, who has no idea and doesn't feel the same way.

But that was my life, and there was nothing I could really do about it.

I walked into my house, locking the door behind me and holding in the groan when I saw my mother sitting in the family room. I knew my dad wasn't home because his cruiser wasn't outside, so I planned on making a quick escape to my bedroom. I kicked off my shoes and hung my jacket in the closet, turning around and gasping when I saw that my mother had moved from her spot. She was standing right in front of me now, and I could smell the alcohol already. She had obviously drank a lot for me to smell it when she was a few feet away from me, but that wasn't what scared me. Her eyes, they were darker than they usually were. She didn't look angry, her face wasn't twisted in that way, but by the way she looked at me, I had a horrible feeling in my gut.

"Where were you?" Her dead voice made me feel even worse, so I quickly answered her.

"Alice and I went to go dress shopping. Emmett's twentieth is in a couple of days, so she helped me find something to wear," I explained quickly, trying to do whatever possible to keep her wrath away from me.

"Who permitted you to go, and where did you get the money?"

"You were working this morning, so – "

Her growl shut me up immediately as she interrupted. "Did I fucking as you where I was? I asked you who permitted you to go and where the hell you got the money from, Isabella. Answer the fucking question properly!"

"Ch-Charlie did. And I used my own money, I just got my pay from the diner."

"Oh, you used your _own_ money, Isabella? And who said that was okay?"

She looked furious, stepping towards me while I backed up against the wall.

"It's the money I get from working there, so I assumed it would be alright."

I didn't manage to get another word out before her hand grabbed my neck and pushed my head into the wall so hard that my vision blurred for a moment. I could barely breathe as she tightened her hold and snarled right into the face. "You fucking pathetic little brat, that's not your money. I own you, so everything you have is mine. So that means that you went out and spent _my_ money. You stole it from me."

She pulled me to her and pushed me back into the wall again, harder than she had the time before. Whatever breath that was in me left my body as my legs buckled underneath me, but her arm kept me up. With her free hand, she winded back and punched me in the stomach, making me lurch forward and grab it in pain. Before I managed to react from her punch, she pushed my head back to the wall, making me cry out in pain. I could feel something warm on my face, realizing it must've been my blood. This had been by far the worst that she'd gone on me, and I could feel myself slipping into unconsciousness as the pain ripped through my body. I couldn't scream, I couldn't make any sound but cry in pain. I couldn't tell her to stop.

"Don't you even think I'm done with you yet, Isabella." She gripped my hair and pulled hard in her direction, then slamming my face to the wall. She pressed my cheek into the wall and leaned over to whisper in my ear. "You stupid, pathetic brat. I can do whatever I want to you and you'd never say a word. Why is that, huh? You could have ran by now. Could've told your annoying best friend or that fucking boyfriend of yours. Or even your damn father. But I've raised you well, little girl. You know when to keep your mouth shut."

I whimpered in pain, wanting to snap back at her for insulting Alice and Edward, but she punched me in the stomach again before I could even attempt to. She let go of me and my body dropped to my knees as I clutched my stomach. I knew I only had a little longer left before I was knocked out, but I tried to hold on for as long as I could. The tears of pain started falling down my cheeks and I was silently praying for someone, _anyone_ to find me. To hear my screams and come save me. I knew if she saw me crying, she would've done worse to me. But I couldn't help it, there was no way for me to hold anything in any longer. My body was shutting down, and I was losing my control.

"What are you doing, Isabella? Are you… are you_ crying_?" I could hear the surprise laced with anger in her voice and I tried to brace myself for the next impact. Another shooting pain ran up my spine when she kicked me and I fell face first to the floor before she kicked me again. My eyes fluttered closed as everything went black, her continuing to beat me as I started to let go. I could hear her screaming, but also another deeper voice as well before slipping into unconsciousness.

When I opened my eyes again, even though my sight was still a little hazy, I knew that I wasn't in my house anymore. Or on the floor, but rather in a bed. I squinted against the bright lights, feeling the start of a brutal headache, and tried to figure out where the hell I really was. There were monitors, beeping every time my heart pumped I guessed, and this random pole to my left. I looked a bit higher up and saw the IV bag hanging onto it, so I knew I was in the hospital. Problem was, how did I get there? I tried moving my hands, which hurt like hell from all the needles that were in me. There was no way I could lift my left hand, so I looked to my right hand to try and froze.

Barely a couple inches away from my fingers was a sleeping Edward, his usually frowning or amused face void of any expression. He looked years younger than his seventeen years, but I found nothing wrong with it. Really, it was comforting how peaceful he looked. I realized my right hand was better to move when I unconsciously ran my fingers through his hair. He looked so tired, even when he was sleeping, and I felt pretty protective of him right then. To be honest, if I had ever thought about waking up in a hospital, I would've expected Alice to be waiting for me to wake up. Or even my dad. But never Edward.

He started shifting in his sleep, sighing my name under his breath, and I couldn't help but gasp. But I was being stupid and naïve, he was just concerned for me. Him dreaming of me was nothing like the way I dreamt about him. He probably just hoped I would make it through this. I kept running my fingers through his hair, remembering when he had told me how much he loved it, but he would never let anyone else touch his hair. It did make me feel a lot better the night he'd told me that after hearing a rumour about someone catching him in the boys washroom with Lauren on her knees in front of him. I never told him what I had heard, but I was definitely hurting. So knowing that I could do something that could make him feel good that those other sluts couldn't made me feel better than I had been for a long time.

He sighed again before his eyelids started to flutter, taking a few moments before opening them and looking right at me. His eyes shot open when he saw that I was awake, moving his chair closer to me and pushing away the few strands of hair that were on my face. His touch always had the strangest feeling to me, making me giddy but giving me this weird shock at the same time. I played it off like I usually did and groggily smiled.

"Bells, you're awake?" It was more of a statement than a question, but he frowned as he looked my face over before breaking out into a smile. "You're awake."

"Yeah," I managed to croak out and licked my dry lips before trying to talk again. "How did – what hap-"

"You don't remember?" The frown came back as he stopped me from talking, realizing that it wasn't working out very well and my throat was probably sore. His jaw tensed and lips formed a straight line as he turned his head away from me. My stomach sank as I tried to figure out what was going on, and what had happened to me. But I knew that it was bad either way with the response I was getting from Edward.

_Okay Bella, start from the beginning._

I went shopping with Alice. She drove me home, and I remember waving bye to her. Charlie wasn't home yet so dinner wouldn't be ready. I walked in to the house and saw Renee in the family room. The smell of alcohol filled my senses until I realized what happened.

"Mom," I whispered, my heart rate beginning to race as I started to panic. Where was she? Was she looking for me? Oh God, I was in the hospital, so I had to make up an excuse with what happened to me. Would she be waiting outside for me, hearing what I would say? Would it be enough for her, or would she get angry again? My throat tightened even more as I kept freaking out, and I tried to breathe but I couldn't get enough into my lungs. My sight was hazy again, and I could only hear muffled sounds through my ears.

I felt something on each of my cheeks, the warmth from them spreading throughout my body. But it was soothing, and I could feel a slight improvement. It wasn't much, but my sight and hearing were almost back to normal. As soon as my eyes were fine, I was met with Edward's face, and I heard him say my name over and over again.

"Bells, look at me," He commanded firmly, and I brought my eyes up to his, trying to breathe but I could barely even get a breath in. "Bells, I'm here. Look at me; it's going to be okay. I'm here."

I listened to his comforting voice and felt my eyes well up with tears, but I wasn't upset. I was rather overwhelmed with the love I was feeling for him at that moment. And when my body started relaxing and I could breathe properly again, I didn't stop slipping into his stunning, green eyes. For a moment, I thought that he must've felt the same way. But I didn't want to ruin anything, so I ignored that feeling and let myself relax under his words. I heard scuffling behind him and felt other hands on me, making Edward's hands leave my face. In a panic, I quickly grabbed his hand with both of mine, whimpering in pain as I pulled against the needle in my left hand.

"Bella! What are you – "

"Don't go Edward, please," I begged, my eyes pleading for him to stay even though the nurses that had entered my room were giving him their dirtiest looks. He looked back and forth between them and me, trying to tell me he couldn't stay but I wouldn't have it. I was too scared to be alone with them, even if they were just trying to help. I needed him with me. "Please, don't leave me."

The nurses hesitated, looking at each other briefly before one nodded. He walked back to his chair and sat down, cradling my right hand in both of his.

"I would never leave you, Bella. Ever."

Everyone was in complete awe when they walked into the Cullen household, amazed at how beautifully the designers had decorated the place for Emmett's birthday. I wished I could've seen everything, but I was confined to the couch in the living room. Edward's rules.

I guess it was only fair, considering I had only been let out of the hospital for a few hours. But it didn't matter what had happened, I wasn't going to miss Emmett's birthday. Over the years of living in Forks, he pretty much became like the big brother I never had. The best part was, even when his friends were making fun of Alice and I, he wouldn't have it. He was never embarrassed for standing up for us, even with us being four years younger than him. Emmett Cullen was different, but in an entirely good way.

And plus, he came down from university to come to his birthday party organized by his family and friends. He could've partied away in Washington, but he let his U Dub friends wait another day instead. He definitely needed some R&R time though, especially with all his medical studying. At first look, anyone would've thought that the big, handsome guy in front of them was just a typical jock, but not Emmett. Not only was he totally model material, but he had some wicked brains to go with it. He took following in Carlisle's footsteps seriously, and that's why he went into following his career path. Everyone was proud of him, and we couldn't wait to see him again.

Problem was, he was on his way and I was completely terrified. I knew everyone had found out what Renee had done, and that it was going on for years. When I had gotten home, Charlie's cruiser wasn't in the driveway again. I was abso-fucking-lutely terrified, wondering if Renee was still in the house. But when Edward brought me inside, he told me that she was gone. And that Charlie was out taking care of something, which I assumed was related to Renee, and that he would be at the party tonight.

I didn't want everyone to know. I was embarrassed, to say the least. But what helped me out a bit was that no one had brought it up. No one looked at me weird, and no one had questions on why I was all taped up. Or where the stitches on my head came from. Or why my lip was busted.

God, I looked like a fucking mess.

But Edward assured me that I looked beautiful when I walked out of my bedroom, wearing the new dress Alice and I had gone out to buy. It was strapless, fitted until just above my waist and then flowed out to right above my knees. Edward had always complimented me on how much he liked blue on me, so that's what colour I chose. It was simple, the lace along the fitted part the only thing that kept it from being too plain. But I liked it, and blushed when Edward had agreed before helping me down the stairs.

So, anyways, according to Edward, if I were to go to the party I would have to adhere by his own rules.

Rule number one: I don't move from the couch. If I need anything, I'm to ask him and he'll get it for me. He'd only leave the living room if he were to get something, but he would stay other than that.

Rule number two: I was not to answer anyone's questions, if they brought it up, about what happened to me. According to him, "it's none of their fucking business". I told him I obviously couldn't say that, so he said to just ignore them or make a witty comeback. Yeah, I was good at those, so that was fine.

Rule number three: Do NOT move from the couch.

He made that really clear. I mean, the same rule repeated twice, so obviously he was serious. And after what he'd done for me, I wouldn't have denied him. He didn't go into how I got to the hospital. Hell, he'd changed the subject more times than I could count when I would bring it up, but I knew it had to do with him somehow. Alice started to cry when I walked into the house and started talking about it, but Edward quieted her quickly before she could say anything. Esme and Carlisle didn't say a word, but instead hugged me gently like I was about to break, and I saw Esme's shoulders shake when Carlisle had pulled her into his arms once we'd walked away.

There was something going on, I knew it. And I needed to find out.

I started to plan things out, backup plans to my own backup plans starting to form before I heard everyone yell 'Surprise!' in the other room. I looked up and saw everyone cheering before it went silent too soon. They started to huddle to the wall, and Edward yelling Emmett's name angrily before seeing him emerge out of the crowd. He pushed the last person out of the way, trying not to be harsh but it still scared me when they were stumbling to the wall, and then he froze when he saw me. I swallowed nervously and said hi to him.

"Don't you fucking do that, Bella. I swear to God, don't you even try to act like there's nothing going on," He growled, and I saw Edward come up from behind him, his eyes narrowed as he grabbed Emmet's arm. He told him to stop before Emmett wretched his arm out of his grip and pointed his finger right at his face. "Don't you fucking dare, Edward. I won't sit here and pretend to enjoy myself like the rest of you."

He stomped his way to where I was sitting, and I instinctively pushed myself back further into the couch, trying to brace myself for whatever was coming, but found myself in pain instead. I gasped, but it sounded more like I had sobbed, and my eyes started to tear.

_No, no. This isn't happening._

I didn't know why I was scared, it was only Emmett. But from having this same thing happen every time before Renee would beat me, it was an immediate reflex. When I looked up at Emmett though, I realized it was the wrong one. He stood like a statue in front of me, jaw dropped, his deep breaths the only sound in the room other than the whispers of Esme and Carlisle as they sent everyone into the other room. Emmett took a small step towards me, watching if I would sink back again, but I didn't. I sat there motionless, waiting for whatever he would do. Me not flinching again gave him enough courage to slowly come right to me, kneeling in front of me. His eyes ran over my body, looking at the marks on my arms and the other injuries on me before looking back to me.

"Bella," he said softly, which was unusual for Emmett. "I would never hurt you."

A treacherous tear fell when I realized that me pulling back upset him. I had hurt him. Emmett, one of my best friends. I knew he would never hurt me, ever. Especially not in a physical way like Renee would do. I didn't trust myself to talk, knowing I would've started sobbing right there, so I nodded and gave him a small smile. Instead of him smiling back though, his eyes started to glisten with his own tears, which was another thing that was very unlike Emmett. My heart was breaking just watching him.

"But I am mad at you. Hell, I've never been so pissed off at you before, ever." He tried to be firm, and I knew he was trying to hold it together, but his voice cracked at the end. "You're my little swan, Bella. You know I'd do anything to keep you safe. Why wouldn't you just come to me?"

I bit my lip, holding everything back, but it was hard with the way he was acting. Calling me Little Swan was one of the names only Emmett called me, everyone knew that. But I couldn't blame him for feeling like he did, any of the people I loved for that matter. Even til that day, I never really knew the exact reason why I never told anyone. I knew I would be embarrassed if I had, which was one reason. I didn't want people to think I was weak, or frail. But I also thought that Renee would change once Charlie came into our lives again. But I was wrong, so wrong.

"If you didn't trust me enough, I understand. But you could've went to Alice, or Edward. Hell, even my parents. But why, Bella? Why couldn't you just tell us so we could _stop_ her?"

A tear slipped down his cheek, and I broke down. Emmett leaned over and wrapped his arms around me and whispered in my ear. "I'm sorry Bella. I'm sorry I couldn't save you."

He held me, being careful not to hurt me but I needed more from him. I pulled my arms around his neck and squeezed him as tightly as I could, needing him then more than anything. Sobbing into his shirt, I kept crying that I was sorry. That I didn't want to hurt them. That I loved him. But it wasn't enough for me, I would still be guilty no matter how long it took for him to forgive me. Or for any of them to forgive me. I wasn't sure how long Emmett held me until I stopped sobbing, but when I looked around, I saw that everyone had left. I apologized again to Emmett for ruining his birthday, but he told me that he didn't give a shit. He wouldn't let me go, even when I'd stopped crying, until I heard another voice behind him.

"Bella?"

My head shot up to my dad's voice and Emmett let me go before I stood up, running towards him while ignoring any pain it caused. He immediately pulled me into his arms and kissed my forehead, his own tears now falling down onto his shirt with my own. Now, the guilt was completely drowning me. My dad had lost his chance to be with his one love all because of me. The whole point of us coming to Forks for my parents to get together again was completely pointless now.

"Baby, I'm so, so sorry," He whispered, gently rubbing his hand on my back. "I can't believe it was so obvious, even the first day that you came. I never knew baby. I'll never let her hurt you again, I promise."

I nodded my head, but I couldn't help but wonder where my mother was during all of this. And even though my dad had promised to keep me safe from her, I wasn't sure if he could do that exactly. She was conniving and insane. There were a lot of things that she could do to get her way.

Charlie pulled back a bit, eyeing me closely but I saw the pain and guilt in his eyes. I couldn't help but let my eyes droop a bit, the whole thing plus the heavy medication I was under having a toll on me. "Damn, you must be exhausted. Do you mind holding on for a bit longer, Bella? I just wanted to talk to Carlisle and Esme about something, and then we'll head home."

I nodded again but yawned, saying it was okay before I felt the familiar surge through my body. "Charlie, I can bring her home if you'd like. I'll stay with her until you get home."

My father's arms left my side, and I turned to look at Edward, but he didn't look at me. Charlie nodded, patting his shoulder with his hand and thanking him. But there was a sort of undertone to it. He was thanking him for more than just bringing me home. Edward let go of my hand and placed it on the small of my back, leading me out the door and to his car. The ride home was silent. The speakers were void of any music, which was the first time since Edward had gotten his car. I gazed up at him a few times, but his face was staring straight out of his window. I felt worse than I had before, but I wasn't able to think about it too much before I dozed off.

I woke up when I heard my bedroom door open as Edward carried me in his arms and placed me onto my bed. I don't think he realized that I was awake, even though I was still a little groggy, and he started to take off my flats. When he did, he sat on the edge of my bed, and I turned my head to look at his form through the dim moonlight coming through my window. He pulled his head into his hands, pulling his hair slightly with his fingers, which was a habit of his when he was frustrated. I pushed away my sleep, needing to talk to him and find out what was wrong. More so, what happened when I was unconscious.

"Edward?" His figure jumped a bit, startled that I was awake but he wouldn't turn to look at me. I swallowed against the fear I had, rolling over to my side, which hurt like hell by the way, and spoke again. "Hey, talk to me."

Still, no answer, and I grew annoyed. He never acted that way with me, and I wasn't going to sit there and feel like shit while he sulked over whatever he was sulking over. I sat up, but turned a weird way which did something to my ribs and gasped as I lost all the oxygen in me. That got him moving, making him spin around quickly and reach out to touch me, but his arm hung in the air instead. He looked me over, seeing where the damage was while I started to get my breath back.

"Bella, are you alright?" He asked, genuinely concerned about me, but I was already frustrated with being left out in the dark. I didn't want to be treated like some pathetic, weak girl, and that's exactly how I felt.

"No, Edward. I'm not alright," I snapped, wincing again when I put too much force into it. He leaned over to try to help me, but I stopped him by putting my palm up to him. "I'm not alright at all. I've had to deal with this hushed bullshit from everyone, whispering behind my back about things that I have no idea about. No one will answer my questions, and no one will treat me like they did less than three days ago. I'm not a piece of glass, I won't break. And especially you, you've barely talked to me all night!"

"Me? You're blaming this on me?" He was shocked, but his anger came back immediately. "Don't you even try me, Bella. I'm not to blame for anything. Blame that fucking disgusting mother of yours, she's to blame for everything. And if you don't want to do that, then blame _yourself_."

I froze, narrowing my eyes at him as he pulled the unthinkable. "Blame _myself_? Right, that's perfect, I'll do just that. I didn't ask for her to give birth to me, Edward. I didn't ask her to leave my dad and move to Phoenix, where God knows what she did as a living. I didn't ask her to take care of me, and I didn't ask her to bring me back here. And I sure as hell did _not_ fucking ask her to beat me whenever she felt like it!"

I definitely made him stop whatever he was planning on doing at that moment, his frown still there but it wasn't because he was angry, but rather because he was upset.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that at all. You're obviously not to blame for any of this fucking mess. I'm just angry at the whole thing. I just wish you could've listened to me back when you first told me and said something."

"It's alright, I know," I sighed, reaching out and running each one of my fingers over each of his, something that I'd started doing when we'd have our heart to hearts together. "I can't say why I never said anything, I still don't know why myself. But I know that I didn't want people to think I was weak, or treat me differently. I mean, you saw everyone in there Edward, that's exactly what they were doing."

"Everyone's still in shock, you just need to give them some time, trust me." I nodded, because I did trust him, before I reached his pinky. Instead of him doing the same to me like we usually did, he intertwined his fingers in mine. I looked up to him and saw the same green eyes I always loved holding back unshed tears. "Bells, you have no idea what I went through these last couple of days."

I swallowed back the lump in my throat. "Edward, what happened?"

He looked away, taking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly before looking back at me. "I wanted to come by to see if you wanted to see the present I got Emmett. On my way to your place, I passed by Alice and talked to her for a bit before getting back to driving. But right as I got out of my car, I could hear the screaming from inside your house. And I recognized your voice, so I ran in there. The door was unlocked, so when I opened it, I saw Renee kicking you and I flipped.

"I was so fucking angry Bells, I swear, it's as if I was watching everything happen in slow motion rather than doing it myself. So, I went up to her and pushed her. But I pushed her hard, because I knew about everything between you two. It was all that pent up anger towards her, you know? So I pushed her and she fell right on her ass. I dragged her to the washroom, pushed her in there and propped up a chair underneath the doorknob so she couldn't get out. But when I got to you, you were already unconscious. God, Bells, you were bleeding so badly. And your heart rate was way too slow, so I panicked. I picked you up, put you in my car and drove you to the hospital. I called your dad and mine on the way, so he would be there when we got there.

"Your mom, well, your dad found her. I don't really know exactly what he did, but I'm guessing that's why he wanted to talk to my parents. I don't really give a fuck what he did to her though, as long as you're safe."

He took a deep breath, caressing my hand with his free one, looking down at our joined fingers. "Bells, I was so scared. I really thought that I was going to lose you. I wish I could've came sooner, or that I hadn't stopped to talk to Alice. Because none of this would've happened." He chuckled deeply, and I saw the shine of a falling tear fall down onto my bed. "But I can't do anything now. I can't change the past, but I can change the future. Our future."

Edward looked back up at me, and I couldn't help but start to cry again. He reached up with our locked hands, brushing away my tear with his thumb. I let go of his hand, placing my palm on the back of it as he cupped my cheek.

"Bella, I can never lose you. I wouldn't be able to live if I ever did." He took in a shaky breath and leaned in closer. "I love you."

And once those three glorious words were spoken, Edward Cullen gave me my first kiss.

His lips were warm and soft against mine, moving slowly against my frozen ones until I quickly reacted and kissed him back. It was short, but it meant more to me than any other thing in my entire life. He was still gentle with me, but it was all I needed.

"I love you too. I always have," I whispered once he pulled away, giving me one more chaste kiss before he smirked through his tears.

"Hey Bella, will you be my girlfriend?"

I couldn't help but laugh as he changed the mood between us, making me laugh even though I was hurting inside. And outside, for that matter. I tapped my finger against my lips, pretending to be in thought. "I don't know. I'll have to think about it."

His crooked smile lit up his face as he leaned in and kissed me again. "Well, how about now?"

"S-still t-thinking," I sputtered, completely dazzled by him. He leaned in again, kissing me the smallest bit harder.

"And now?" He said softly, his voice deeper than usual.

"Maybe," I whispered, closing my eyes before he kissed me again, but this time grazing his tongue softly against my bottom lip.

"What about now?" I kept my eyes closed and nodded before I felt him shuffle off the bed. I shot my eyes open and saw him walking away, asking where he was going. "You can't sleep in that dress, even if you do look beautiful in it. It'll get ruined."

I nodded again stupidly, still in some state of shock after that amazing kiss. Or, kisses for that matter. Edward took out a pair of flannel pants and tshirt out of my drawer, placing them on my bed before leaving my bedroom so I could change. I went as quick as I could to get my dress off and put on my clothes, calling him once I was finished so he would come back in. He took the dress off of my bed where I had left it, hung it up in my closet before turning back to me. He stood there awkwardly, knowing he was supposed to wait for Charlie to come back, but I needed him near me. I moved back slightly and patted the bed beside me, pulling back the covers and putting them around me. He still stood there, probably wondering what his next move would be.

_Boys_.

I wanted to roll my eyes, but I knew it would've given me a bigger headache than the one I already had. "Edward, stay with me? Please?" He took in a deep breath before pulling off his shoes and walking to my bed. I pulled back the covers for him as he gently settled in beside me, keeping a safe distance away from me. I shot him a look and he sighed, giving in as he moved closer and shifted to his side, settling his arm on my waist softly. I reached and intertwined my fingers in his free hand, rubbing my thumb on the back of his hand. "Thank you, for everything." I yawned then, managing to tell him that I loved him before closing my eyes.

"I love you too, Bella." I heard him whisper as I drifted off. "Forever and always."

**~.~**

"Alright Bella, that's the last one. Anything else we need?"

I looked over the college application papers in front of me, frowning in thought while I tried to remember if everything was right.

"Nope, I think that's good, Dad. Thanks for helping." I smiled up at him, sincerely thankful that he had helped me. There was no way in hell that I could've filled the boatloads of papers out _and_ finish all the essay writing in time. They really weren't joking when they said to start early.

College, I will never doubt you again.

But I was glad that I did finish everything early, because tonight was date night with Edward. Okay, that sounded lame, it wasn't date night. It was more that I was going to stay over at the Cullen's and spend as much time with Edward as I could. Esme and Carlisle had some sort of seminar to go to for the night, and would be back the day after, so I thought it'd be cool if Alice and I had a slumber party.

That was the story for the outsiders. But really, it was something else.

It was more than a year since Edward and I had been together. Everyone was more than accepting of our relationship. I mean, who wouldn't? We grew up together, our families knew each other, and he treated me better than anyone else. Hell, if Charlie accepted him, than anyone would. After he filed for sole custody, and after bringing Renee to court, he was severely protective of me. I didn't blame him all that much, even when we were beyond furious when Renee had gotten off with barely a slap on the wrist, but it did get a little overwhelming at times. But, he was a dad, it was expected.

I hadn't heard from Renee since that day she got me into the hospital. After some talking with Carlisle, he figured it'd be best if I saw a professional about all I'd gone through. I wasn't comfortable with it, but Edward said it would help me, so I did it. I wanted to be good for him, even if we were still just hopeless teenagers in love, so I went along with it. And it really did help in the end. There was no guilt when it came to what Renee had done to me, or with anything related to her for that matter. She meant nothing to me.

Don't get me wrong, it would upset me at times when I'd go through something that needed some sort of maternal advice. But I didn't exactly tell anyone that, because of the situation being what it was. So I let those feelings slide. I wasn't really angry at her, or upset with her, or anything. I just didn't care for her.

Edward ended up staying an extra year, saying that he wanted to fit some extra studying, but I knew that it was for me. He was just as protective of me as Charlie was. And it didn't help when not only did your girlfriend grow up to be a fine piece of ass, but so did your sister. Age did well with Alice and I, but don't get me wrong, it did amazingly with Edward. I couldn't imagine how he'd look ten years from now, or twenty, or thirty. I was lucky, beyond lucky for that matter. Not only was I in love with the most perfect boyfriend ever, but I had the highest chances into getting into the top schools in the country.

Life was definitely good.

But tonight, I wanted to make it a bit better. I was seventeen, with my boyfriend for more than a year, and we hadn't even had sex yet. I knew I was a bit young, but being with Edward was a decision I knew I wouldn't make a mistake about. We hadn't really talked about it, but it had almost happened a few times. It always started with us kissing, then there was tongue, then there was groping, and then there was nothing.

I didn't know what sexually frustrated meant until there was nothing.

Problem was, I was a little insecure when it came to sex. The rumours related to Edward were kind of hard to ignore. I mean, I'd heard everything. But it made me a bit nervous to know that I wasn't as experienced as he was. I wanted to be good for him, to be good with him.

So I grabbed my nicest boy shorts with a matching bra, threw on some jeans and a fitted v-neck tshirt, running downstairs with my overnight bag to pull on my Vans and head out. Once I'd gotten to the Cullen's house, I saw that Carlisle and Esme's car was gone, realizing that they'd left already, and walked into the house. Alice already knew of my plans, and was strangely excited for me, so she played the part. Edward was still at football practice, showing off whatever a quarterback does, so he wouldn't be back for another hour. I made dinner, being one of the few good things I learned through the years, while Alice helped. By the time everything was almost finished, I heard the door open and Edward's voice call out to us. I kept stirring the pasta until I felt his arms wrap around my waist and a soft kiss placed on my neck.

"Hey beautiful, I missed you." His touch still made me feel electrified, but it was comforting now when he'd told me that he felt the same way. I leaned back into his arms, letting his body heat warm me up. Not that I was cold before, but I wasn't going to _not_ snuggle into him. That'd be ridiculous.

"Missed you too. Hungry?" I picked out a piece of chicken out of the pasta, turning my head and placing it to Edward's lips. He opened up his mouth, and _licked_ the remaining sauce on my finger, and then moaned.

Okay, definitely sexually frustrated.

"Starving. I'll just wash off quickly and be down in a couple minutes." I nodded, leaning up and kissing his jaw, but was grossed out when I felt a sweat bead trickle onto my lips. Edward laughed and pulled his arms off, smacking my butt gently. "That was your fault, I told you I needed to wash off."

I wiped off my lips and laughed at him, winking back at me before running up the stairs.

Dinner went well, Alice and Edward definitely loved my cooking so there were no leftovers. Emmett called us from Washington, filling us up with what was up with him and we did the same. Mine and Emmett's relationship was tighter than it ever had been after his birthday. We had a pretty intense heart to heart the day after when he'd dropped by. He was definitely a topic that was usually discussed during my therapy sessions too. I was hurt that I'd hurt him, and he was hurt that I was hurt, especially that I was hurt that he was hurt because I hurt him.

Yeah, it was fucked up. But we were better than ever, and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

Before I knew it, we'd finished watching the movie we rented and started to get ready for bed. And considering I wasn't at my place for Edward to climb through the window, which by the way Charlie had forbid him to do once he found out we were dating, I figured I'd head over to his bedroom. I changed into a pair of flannel pants and tank top before walking into his bedroom. He was listening to music, but turned when he saw me come through the door and smiled crookedly at me. He patted the bed beside him and I closed the door, walking to his side and snuggling beside him. Pulling out his headphones from his stereo and letting the music play out loud, he wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled his face into my hair.

"Thanks again for dinner tonight Bells. I'd tell you how good it was, but I have a feeling you already knew that."

I giggled and poked his chest, pulling my head back to look at him. "I did, actually. But you can keep complimenting me if you'd like."

He quirked his eyebrow, smirking as whatever dirty thoughts were going through his mind. "And what do I get in return?"

_Well, time for the game plan to begin. It's now or never._

"Anything you want," I told him softly, looking down at his lips. When Edward noticed, he leaned down and kissed me chastely.

"Well, you're sexy. Ridiculously smart. And you've got this crazy fucking tongue. "I mock gasped in shock and started to squirm but he held me in place. "I meant with the way you talk, dirty girl. But you do use it pretty well on me too."

He kissed me again, gently but he used a bit more force than he had before. I pushed my body flush onto his, running my fingers through the ends of his hair on the back of his neck. He pulled his lips away and leaned his forehead on mine, leaving us to catch our breath.

"I love you," I whispered, softly stroking his jawline with the back of my hand.

"I love you too, baby. Forever and always."

I leaned back and my lips on his, pushing him onto his back and kissing him deeper. My tongue grazed his bottom lip, making him groan as he brought his hands to my hips and pulled me to straddle him. He rarely ever went that far with me, but I didn't mind at all. I liked feeling him under me. He parted his lips and massaged my tongue with him, causing me to moan too. But I knew that he was about to stop right then. That's how far we always got.

But, he never did.

He kept kissing me, harder after every moment, and started to lift the hem of my top and made circles on my stomach with his thumbs. I moaned again, letting him know that it was more than okay for him to keep going, and he did. His hands slowly went up to the bottom of my bra, still kissing me hungrily, and grazed the wire.

"Bella," Edward whispered, but it was more of a request than that. I sat up, pulling up the bottom of my top and throwing it onto the floor. He groaned, seeing more of me than he ever had before, and I went down to kiss him again. His hands ran up and down my sides while I started to do the same to his stomach as he did to me. I placed both of my hands underneath his shirt, slowly running them up to feel every single muscle underneath my fingers. He groaned again and started to sit up, pulling me with him. I figured we'd gotten farther than we ever had, so he was going to stop then, but again, he didn't. Instead, he lifted up his shirt and threw it onto the new pile we were making before grabbing my waist and pulling me closer to him. I whimpered when I felt how hard he was, knowing right then that we were going to have sex, no matter what. But, knowing how Edward was, he took my whimper as a bad thing and pulled away quickly.

"Are you alright?" He asked breathlessly, his voice husky, hair a bigger mess than it usually was. I could only imagine how I looked like.

"Perfect," I whispered, placing my lips back on his and wrapping my hands around his neck. Feeling more confident than I ever had been, I shifted my hips against his and moaned louder when I felt him. Edward pulled away and made the same sound as I did, trailing kisses down my jaw and to my neck, sucking on the skin there. I pulled my hands from his neck, running them down his chest and stomach before settling on the waistband of his pants and pulling against them slightly. He immediately stopped kissing me and held onto my wrists to stop me.

"Bella, we can't –"

"Edward, we can," I interrupted him and let my head drop to his shoulder, feeling like shit from rejection already. "Please."

He breathed in deeply, still holding my wrists for a few moments before slowly letting them go. Instead of letting me start back with his pants, his hands went straight to mine after he pushed me back to the bed on my back. He stared back at me, waiting for me to tell him to stop, but I wouldn't. This was exactly what I wanted, and I knew he did too. I leaned up and kissed him, giving him more motivation to keep going. He pulled down my pants slowly, throwing them off the bed and trailed his hands up my sides to my back where he unclasped my bra and threw it off too. I felt a little self conscious from being practically naked, but it didn't bother me all that I'd thought it would. I was comfortable with Edward, and always would be. He kissed my neck, moving down to my collarbone before kissing the tops of my breasts. He took in a deep breath and cursed silently before licking my nipple, blowing on it after and making it hard. Placing his tongue back on it, he began to massage my nipple with it and massaging my other breast with his hand. I bit my lip to keep myself from moaning, not wanting Alice to hear anything even though her bedroom was a safe distance away from Edward's. After spending some time getting to know my right nipple, he moved over and introduced his tongue to my left one.

I whimpered his name, wanting him to stop with the damn foreplay before I spontaneously combusted, and started to play with his waistband again. He let me start to pull them down before moving to take off my panties first, and then getting off of the bed. I heard him open up a drawer and then come back, but minus his pants.

And holy fuck, Edward had been blessed when it came to his dick.

He ripped open the condom package and placed it on him before hovering over me again. "Bells, this is going to hurt for the first little bit, but then it'll feel better. Promise you'll tell me when it hurts too much, and I'll stop."

"I promise," I replied and after a little bit more hesitation on his part, he put one arm under me and wrapped his fingers on my shoulder, using his other hand to guide him into me. I felt his tip touch my heated core, and I moaned again, waiting for him to finally enter me. Slowly, very slowly, he pushed himself into me. I could feel myself being stretched around him, and because he was so big it hurt like hell, but not enough that I couldn't handle. He kept pushing in until he was completely in, popping my cherry right then. I wanted to laugh at that, wondering why the hell someone would relate such an amazing feeling to a damn fruit, but it was definitely not a time for that. I heard Edward whisper if I was okay, so I reassured him that I was, and he put his other hand around my other shoulder, placing his lips back on mine. Pulling out gently, he pushed back the same way. Slow, still painful, but it was starting to feel better. Definitely pleasurable.

He kept his slow pace for a while and then began to speed up a bit, making me moan his name even louder. There was barely any pain left, and I was feeling him fill me over and over again. I lifted up my knees and wrapped my heels around him, whimpering as he went deeper. He pulled away slightly, his bottom lip quivering and eyebrows furrowing as he groaned. Placing his forehead on mine, he started to go faster, whispering my name and that he loved me over and over again.

It was sooner than I'd hoped, but I couldn't hold back any longer before I climaxed, and I felt him follow me shortly. He stayed hovered over me, breathing in shallow breaths before pulling out of me, making me wince. Panicking yet again, he asked if I was alright and I told him I was fine. And I was. Hell, I was more than fine. I just had sex with my boyfriend who I loved more than anything, and it was the most amazing thing I'd ever experienced.

**~.~**

"No way, you've got to be fucking kidding me!" I screamed, jumping in the same spot with the paper in my hands.

"Bella, language!"

"Sorry, Dad," I apologized, but kept jumping until I saw Alice and Edward walk in the door. I ran towards them and pulled Alice into a hug, squealing a good few octaves higher than normal. I was sure the dogs in the neighbourhood were plugging their ears by now. "I got in! Harvard gave me an early acceptance!"

Alice started to squeal and jump with me as we celebrated my great news, but it was short lived when I saw Edward frowning in the corner. "Hey, what's wrong? Why aren't you celebrating?"

He immediately wiped his frown off his face and smiled, but it never reached his eyes. "Sorry Bells, just doing some thinking. I'm really happy for you."

And that's when it all started. For months after I'd gotten my acceptance letter, Edward had started to become distant. It wasn't much at first, we were still together all the time, and we had sex together too, but I could tell when he was holding back from me. But I loved him and respected his privacy, so I waited for him to come to me.

But he never did. He started making excuses for not being able to see me, and spent more time with his guy friends. It didn't bother me that he was hanging out with them, because I wasn't some clingy girlfriend and I knew he needed guys in his life too. But it was more than just needing some guy time. It felt like Edward was ignoring me, or ignoring something that had to do with me. Hell, I was so damn frustrated, I had no idea what the hell was going on. But I figured being a good girlfriend meant that I would still love him regardless, so that's exactly what I did.

Graduation came up sooner than I'd thought, and I'd gone out with Alice to find the perfect dress for prom. She always had the best sense of style, so she brought me to this boutique out in Port Angeles. I told her of my concerns with Edward, and she said she felt the same way.

"I don't know Bella, he's been like that with everyone. And when we ask him, he just gets pissed off and leaves."

"But why? I don't get it," I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose as I felt the headache come when I'd try to figure out what was really going on. "He's never been like this before. I don't know what I did wrong."

"Hey, don't blame yourself. I'm sure it'll all work out," She said, pulling me into a quick hug before running off in search of my dress. And she found the perfect one. It was midnight blue, Edward's favourite again, an off the shoulder dress that bunched up around my waist and cut off above my knees. It definitely flaunted my figure, and I felt super hot in it, so I didn't hesitate to buy it.

The night before prom, I had practically begged Edward to come through my window. And when I say begged, I mean I kind of pulled him into a guilt trip about how I barely saw him anymore. And that I loved him. I even pouted, knowing that he obviously didn't see it, but hoped that it'd still make an effect on him. Sighing, he agreed and said he'd be there in 15 minutes. And right on time, I heard him climb through my window and sit on my bed.

"Hey," I said softly as I walked out of my bathroom, sitting beside him on my bed. I leaned up, placing my lips on his before he pulled away. Frowning, I let it pass because he was obviously in some sort of a mood, and I didn't want him any worse than he was. Especially with prom being the night after. "Everything alright?"

He sighed and shook his head. "No, everything's not alright Bells. Everything's pretty fucked up right now."

He shook his head again and turned away from me, so I placed my hand on his cheek and pulled him back. "You can come to me about anything, and I'll be right here for you. You know that, right?" He sighed again and nodded, so I waited for him to open up.

"I'm not going to Harvard. I'm going to Stanford." I let my hand fall from his cheek and looked down at it, letting his words sink in.

"But, you said it was your first choice. That we'd be going together," I whispered, my mind denying everything that was going through my head.

"I know, but there were some issues, and I didn't get in. And Stanford's a great school too, so I'm going there," Edward explained and looked back at me, his face void of any emotion. He didn't feel upset, or pained over what he was telling me, not like I was.

"Why wouldn't you tell me, Edward?" I swallowed the lump that was forming in the bottom of my throat and begged for my voice not to let me down. "I had applied there too, I could've picked it instead."

"But Harvard is your dream. I'd never take that away from you."

"But you'd rather leave me instead?" I spat, completely pissed off now that I was with him for months and he had kept such a big thing from me.

_Respect his privacy my fucking ass._

"This is exactly why I didn't want to tell you!" His voice rose as our discussion began to get heated and I ran my fingers through my hair, pulling slightly in frustration. Yet another habit learned from Edward, and one that I wouldn't see next year.

"Why, because you knew I'd be upset? Why the fuck wouldn't I, Edward? I love you, and you kept this from me, and expect me to just be okay with it? Are you insane?" I started to yell before he clamped his hand on my mouth and told me to keep quiet or else Charlie would've came to find out what was going on. I took a few deep breaths, willing myself to calm down because I didn't want to fight with Edward, that was the last thing I wanted to do. "So, what now?"

"I don't know," He breathed out, reaching over and clasping my hand in his. "But we'll figure it out. Anyways, I should go. You've got a big day tomorrow."

I nodded before he kissed me chastely once more and began to make his way out my window. I watched him climb down the tree until he landed safely to the ground before calling out to him. "Hey! I love you."

He turned back to me and smiled again, but a sad smile that never reached his eyes. "Forever and always."

**~.~**

The party at the Cullen's house was definitely better than everyone had expected it to be. Esme and Carlisle, after much pestering by Alice, allowed for our immediate friends to come by after prom, which is what everyone did. Plus, prom was pretty lame, so we left about an hour in. The place was decorated beautifully, keeping up with the Bond theme that we had for prom. Edward had left before Alice and I, saying that he had to take care of something at the house before we got there. I didn't bring up our conversation from the night before, wanting him to enjoy his time tonight with me without any disruptions. Plus, we would figure everything out later.

But why did I have this sinking gut feeling that everything wouldn't be alright?

It worsened during prom. Instead of enjoying himself, Edward had drank alcohol like you would drink water. He stumbled everywhere, luckily not getting caught by any of our teachers, and barely danced with me. I was beyond annoyed at him, considering he barely ever drank at all, but he could have at least kept in check for my damn prom. So when we got to the house and he wasn't there, I was even more pissed off. He left way before we did, having got a ride to our place from a friend, so there was no way he could've been later than us.

I was drinking a beer with Alice in the kitchen before hearing Jessica giggling behind me.

"Did you see Edward? God, he was so smashed. And that chick he was with, she looked like a fucking Barbie doll. Like, excuse me, but you really don't need that much makeup."

I spun around to see her gossiping to Lauren and some other girl I didn't know, so I asked her where she saw him. She gave me possibly the dirtiest look ever before smirking and telling me that she saw him go upstairs with the girl she was talking about behind him. The horrible feeling I had only worsened, and I let my legs take over as I headed up the stairs, straight to his bedroom. I heard sounds coming from inside, praying that it wasn't him. I reached over to the doorknob, holding onto it for a few moments before turning it and pushing the door open.

The pain I felt from Renee punching me and beating me senseless was nothing compared to what I saw in front of me.

Edward was lying down on his bed, his dress pants pulled down to his knees while some blonde was riding him. As the door opened and hit the wall, she immediately stopped and glared at me. Before she had a chance to say anything, Edward took her off of him and pulled his pants up before walking over to me.

"Did you want something, Isabella?"

The air that I had gathered left me again when he called me by my full name. The name that only my mother used, especially before she would hit me. He frowned as I stood there, completely in shock and speechless over what was happening to me.

"Hello, are you fucking retarded or something? You interrupted a pretty good fuck, so if you don't need – " The sound of my slap across his face echoed the hallway, fresh tears falling down my face as his face whipped to the side from my impact. His cheek pinked from where I hit him and he chuckled darkly. "Nice hand. I wonder where you learnt that from."

"Edward," I managed to sputter as everything he was saying to me was ripping a whole into my chest.

"Yes?" He smirked, still swaying slightly from the alcohol in his system.

I looked up to him, hoping I would find him in his eyes, but they were dark and completely lost. "What are you doing?"

He frowned, looking confused as I stood there and waited for him to just explain what was happening. "Well, what does it look like? I'm getting a head start."

"Head start?" I was so confused, wishing he would just tell me what the hell was going on.

He nodded his head and leaned on his doorframe. "Yeah, for next year. I mean, you have to realize I only picked Stanford so I could get rid of you. I'm not a commitment guy, Isabella. So I'll be going to college single, picking up whatever hot bitch I want, and fucking them whenever I please. I couldn't do that with you dragging along."

I took a step backwards, holding myself so my knees wouldn't buckle. My tears kept falling, but I wouldn't allow myself to sob in front of him. "Why, Edward? Why are you doing this?"

He tapped his finger on his lips, pretending to be thinking. "You know, now that I think about it, this could've been so much easier. I could've just left Renee to do whatever she wanted to you that day. That way, I would've never been stuck in this situation in the first place."

The next sound that echoed the hallway was the sound of the crack from my fist punching his nose. He yelled in pain and clutched his nose, the girl that he was with running up and seeing if he was alright. Once she touched his arm, I grabbed from her neck and spun around to the other wall, pushing her head hard to it. But the memory flashed back to when my mother did the same to me, and I immediately let her go. She slouched to the ground and I looked back at Edward, who was still holding his nose. There was nothing more I wanted than to hit him again, show him how much he hurt me, but I couldn't. I _wouldn't_. I wouldn't be like her, in any way.

"I never want to see you again, Edward. You're dead to me."

I turned away and left the two of them in the hallway, in pain, but they were together. And I didn't give a shit if they were. I would leave Forks two days after, spending my summer in Massachusetts with Charlie before moving into residence, leaving all of my memories spent in the town and all of my loved ones.

But most of all, leaving any love I had for Edward Cullen.


	2. Night of the Hunter

A/N: Terrible ending. Don't hate me, yeah? Alright, let's fast forward a bit into the future, shall we?

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 2**_

_**Night of the Hunter**_

_Pray to your god, open your heart  
Whatever you do, don't be afraid of the dark  
Cover your eyes, the devil inside_

_One night of the hunter  
One day I will get revenge  
One night to remember  
One day it'll all just end, oh_

"Night of the Hunter" by 30 Seconds to Mars

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

"Thank you, gentlemen. We'll be in touch soon."

The sharp looking, suit-clad men stood up from their seats, smiling confidently and gathered up their presentation before leaving. If only those morons really knew how God awful their presentation was, that stupid smirk wouldn't be on their faces. But I couldn't bring myself to break their egos just yet. They were smooth. Polite, even. And even though it wasn't the usual me to let them off without breaking them down mercilessly, I thought I'd make a bit of a change and give them a brief dismissal. That meant no insults, no crying, no nothing.

Hell, I could be nice once in a while. And they were the lucky ones this time.

"Miss Swan, the pleasure is ours," One of them boasted, his name I had already long forgotten. Not like I gave a fuck either way. "It's not like we were complaining about sitting in front of a gorgeous woman as yourself. Think of it as you doing us a favour."

_Men_. They were bad as it was, but the business ones were always the worst. Apparently flirting and shots at my self-esteem would give them an easy pass. If only if it were that easy.

I sighed. _So much for that brief dismissal._

"If only I could say the same about the group of you," I began, leaning into my leather chair comfortably, my voice as flat as it could be. "Your presentation was nothing better than what I would expect from an amateur high school student. No spark, no interesting material whatsoever. Your introduction failed to captivate my attention, your explanation lacked the passion needed to sell your idea, and your follow through had me forgetting what it even was that you had. The only emotion you received from me was utter repulsion that you would honestly believe I would invest in that terrible idea of yours. Now, I suggest you take your worthless ideas, throw in those pathetic pieces of paper you call your degrees, and escort yourselves off of my property. Once you've done that, burn them. There's no need for them anymore. You may leave."

Now, _that_ was more like the Isabella Swan I knew and loved.

Their jaws all dropped, gaping at me like I had grown a third head before the one who had spoken up narrowed his eyes at me. I quirked an eyebrow, waiting for him to use his balls, if he even had them, and stand up to me. Though, really, it was always the same reaction.

Wait for it. Wait for it…

He opened his mouth once. Twice. And then realized he had absolutely nothing against me, not to mention I scared the life out of him, and hurried out the door with the other dogs hot on his tail.

Typical. They just never changed. But I didn't blame them, I couldn't really. They knew what they were in for before they even stepped foot into the building doors. They knew what they would be facing if they disappointed.

And that before was just a mild example.

I sat in my seat, remembering everything I'd gone through once more to get to where I was. Harvard kicked my ass, _hard_. But it was a fresh start, one that I'd needed after everything. And when I say everything, I mean after _him_. I never bothered myself to even think about him anymore, it didn't matter to me. Edward Cullen was a piece of my past that I would thankfully not have to relive again, which was definitely a good thing in my books. After all those kickboxing and martial arts classes during college, a broken nose would've been much nicer than what I would've done to him.

So, back to Harvard and thinking everyday was going to be the death of me, it was hard. It was tough. But it made me stronger. Their business program was notorious, not only for its prestige but also for its difficulty. I knew that living under the same Bella Swan would've left me at a disadvantage, so a new start in a new environment meant a new me. So instead of having people call me Bella, I stuck with the one name that I despised the most. The one that my mother would always cal me, _Isabella_. Yeah, it was my actual name, but the name brought back pieces of my past that made me literally want to throw up. But what it also did was remind me of how I was manipulated and taken advantage of, and how I wasn't making that happen anymore. So I stuck with it.

I pushed myself at Harvard, striving to become the best, and that's what I was now.

At the mere age of twenty seven, I was one of the youngest and most successful CEOs in the world. Swan Enterprises was built by my very own hands two years ago, inventing and handling technology that would benefit our world. Supporters came worldwide in thousands, either wanting to get their hands on whatever new technology we had for their own economies, knowing that if they managed to be successful with it then their homelands would've grown drastically or trying to get their own ideas to be included. Swan Enterprises was nothing like the world had seen before. Regardless, it was making effective changes in the world. Not only did we deal with boosting economies, but also providing better means in services that would contribute to making a greener Earth.

Representatives from around the world came to my home office in New York, bringing whatever new ideas that they had in hopes that I would invest in them. Occasionally, I did. But don't get me wrong, you definitely had to show your skills for me to even think about it. I won't lie, I wasn't the easiest person to get around.

Not like you had to guess that, really. I was always a stubborn person, but now with power and respect, I was as stubborn as a brick wall. Scratch that, make that a solid metal wall. Yeah, that sounds more like it.

But could you really blame me? After having a psychotic, abusive lunatic as a mother ripping me physically apart whenever she could, and then having again being ripped apart but emotionally by my pathetic so-called soulmate, there was no way that I was going to let myself become vulnerable again. I wouldn't allow people to walk all over me, no fucking way. And that's why Bella Swan was thrown out the window. Isabella Swan, corporate titan and wealthy CEO of Swan Enterprises took shit from absolutely no one. I was the one person that could either make or break your career.

So those boys from before? Their careers were broken, especially the mouthy one. And they knew that.

A soft knock on the door broke me out of my thoughts and I turned my head towards the door where my secretary was standing.

"Miss Swan? Sorry to disturb you, but Riley's on hold. Would you like me to tell him you're busy?"

I shook my head at Angela, telling her that I would take it from the phone where I was in the conference room. Angela was surprisingly the only secretary I had that had lasted more than a week under me. She reminded me of myself in several ways – headstrong, independent and intelligent. Which is why I liked her. And why she had been my secretary for over a year now.

She nodded her head and turned to leave, but before I could pick up the phone she came back in.

"Oh, I almost forgot. The girl interviewing for the secretary position has arrived, she's waiting outside of my office in the waiting room. Your schedule is clear for an hour until your next meeting, so should I still continue with what you'd planned?"

I couldn't help but smile at Angela. The innocent girl had no idea what tricks were up my sleeve. I gave her a slight over of what I had planned for this interview, mostly that it was just something I needed to take care of and she wasn't losing her position.

"Of course, Angela. You remember everything I'd told you?" I asked.

"Yes, Miss Swan. Everything's prepared. I'll tell her that you will be visiting her shortly when I go back."

"Perfect, thank you Angela. I'll be throwing in an extra something to your pay for your help, I appreciate it." I winked, smiling at her. She blushed and thanked me before leaving the room.

My smile only seemed to grow when I looked back down on the phone, picking up my personal line and throwing on my sweetest, seductive voice.

"Riley, how nice of you to call."

I heard him sigh, whispering my name. "You ran out so quick on me last night, I never had the chance to say goodbye to you properly."

"Properly?" I chuckled, crossing my leg over my thigh. "And how _would_ you say goodbye to me properly, Riley?"

"Isabella," he warned. "Don't tease me or I'll have to come down to your office and _show_ you how I would've said goodbye to you. You really have no idea how hard you make me, it just makes me want you more. I can't get enough of you."

Oh, Riley. The poor thing had no idea what 'just fucking' meant. He was already growing emotionally attached, and what a shame that was. He really was good in bed. Well, better than the others anyway. I was lucky to even get off when I was with anyone; they just weren't it for me. Hell, they could do things to me that I had no idea about, but it wasn't that. It wasn't always enough for me. Every time I was mid-fuck, my pathetic teenage memories would come back to me, reminding me of how good it felt when I was with Edward. So, those times where I would get off, it would either be because I did it myself or because I remembered being with Edward, but those memories faded as the years went on. More recently, it was all me with pleasure. But Riley, he was the first in years that brought me to my brink before I had to deal with it myself. I really was looking forward to trying it again with him, see if he could make me orgasm all on his own.

Well, so much for that anyways. He had to go and ruin it.

"Riley, I told you I had an early meeting which was why I left. Plus, you know I don't do sleepovers." I rolled my eyes, ignoring the pending headache.

"I know that, I really do, Isabella." He breathed deeply a few times into the phone, hesitating before speaking again. "It's just that last night got me thinking. I want us to be more than just this, more than just sex. I want you, baby."

All the air left my lungs at that silly nickname, remembering the numerous times that Edward would call me that. How much I enjoyed his pet names for me, giggling when he'd kiss me after. How I fell into his words and believed I was in love with him. How childish, pathetic, and _weak_ I was.

Alright, this needed to fucking stop, and now.

"I thought we had an agreement on our arrangement, or did you not listen to a word I had said when we first discussed this? I don't need or want someone that way, Riley. I don't now, and I don't need one down the road either."

"Isabella, please, just listen –" He sputtered, trying to rectify himself but I was already done with it. My anger had already pent up from remembering my past with Edward all because of him, and he was going to hear it.

"No, you listen to me Riley," I snapped, unable to help the growl that left my lips. "Fucking is just fucking, no strings attached. That's what we agreed on, and that's what we would've been doing until it somehow ended. I don't need your pathetic feelings, and I don't need any attachment to you romantically. Your dick was all that mattered in our arrangement, even if you couldn't even get me off, as pathetic as that sounds. So no, I don't want us to be more than _this_. And as far as I know, there is no _this_ anymore either. Enjoy the rest of your life Riley, let's hope you find yourself a naïve little girl to have more with, and then you just treat her like a simple _fuck_ just as you all always do."

I slammed the phone down, surprised that I'd let out more than I'd planned. Those last words seemed more directed to Edward to Riley, and I really had no idea where it came from. My heart was racing, hands trembling as I pushed myself to calm down. My anger was always an issue when I was younger and even after taking different classes to settle it down, I still couldn't help when it would arise unexpectedly.

I leaned back into my chair, taking in deep breaths through my nose and out of my mouth, closing my eyes as I did.

It took a few moments for me to calm down after clearing my head before I opened my eyes and slowly stood up. I straightened out my black high-waist pencil skirt which ended right above my knees and adjusted my teal blue sleeveless blouse before taking care of the other business.

I walked into Angela's office, biting my lip to cover my grin when I saw the familiar plastic looking blonde sitting in the chair, tapping her finger against the armrest impatiently. Angela looked up from behind her desk when she heard the elevator doors chime open and smiled at me mischievously.

Oh yeah, definitely a little replica of me.

"Hey _Stacy._" Angela winked and nodded her head towards the blonde. "Here's Miss Swan's interview, but she won't be back for a bit, so she asked for you to show Tanya around by the time she got back."

I nodded, putting my front up and scowling. "She's late again? That's typical Swan, she's always got other shit to do. I have no idea how she's the big boss sometimes."

"I know right? Anyways, just do a quick tour, no big deal I guess." Angela smirked and turned back to her work when I looked back at Tanya.

And right then, I remembered everything just as it had been all those years back.

There she was, Tanya Denali. Twenty eight years old Stanford grad. Strong critiques, reputable references.

_Fucked_ my boyfriend, Edward Cullen, on the night of my prom.

Came to his rescue when I punched his nose. The same one that I threw against the wall.

And now, she was applying for a position in my very own company.

Funny how fate works.

"Nice to meet you, Tanya. I'm Stacy, as you just heard. Let me show you around the major parts of Swan Enterprises."

She sighed dramatically and I held back a smirk as she sat up, clearly not recognizing me whatsoever, pulling down her way too short dress. Apparently she didn't get the memo that clothes suitable for streetwalking wasn't meant for business attire.

Classy, _bitch_.

I brought her down to two floors beneath my office, ignoring the curious stares from my employees. I rarely came down to any floor other than mine, so seeing me was a surprise. Some may have seen me for the very first time right then. But that wasn't the point, I had another thing to deal with.

Like I said, the fates worked in weird ways, and I was definitely going to be using that to my advantage.

"So, this is one of the sales floors. They deal with incoming opportunities worldwide, analyzing whatever possible sales they might have and then send them over to our sales manager who would gather all the information to present in our weekly meetings." I continued to explain everything in full detail, throwing in that she would want to know all of this if she was chosen as secretary, wanting her to break and interrupt me. When she did, I turned towards her and faked a frown.

"Listen, I don't really care about this boring bullshit," She droned, admiring her artificial nails. "To be honest, I either think that HR made a mistake by applying me under the secretary position, or that your boss is just as crazy as I thought."

I looked at her confused silently, waiting for her to keep going. When she didn't, I asked her to explain.

"My God, this is pathetic," She sighed, and my hand twitched as I imagined wiping that look right off of her face. "I know the bitch, this Isabella Swan. High school prom, I dropped by this house party and fucked her boyfriend. Not saying I regret it, I'm not some home wrecker or anything, because he was so damn sexy and definitely knew what he was doing. But she pulled some crazy stunt and threw me against the wall. I didn't swing back, I was making sure her boyfriend, or ex I guess it was then, was okay because she broke his damn nose. Seriously, how is she this huge CEO? The woman is clinically insane. She probably sent me off to be her secretary on purpose, even though I'm way too overqualified for that shit."

My jaw clenched and I flexed my fist unconsciously, but when she gave me a curious look, I pushed it away. I couldn't help but imagine reliving that night again when she pretended to act as if I didn't hurt her.

_Come on, your head broke the plaster, I'm surprised I didn't cause permanent damage._

Then again, after giving her a quick look over, I probably did.

"That's quite the story, Tanya. I've never heard that about Swan before."

"I'm not surprised," she scoffed and looked at me shortly before opening her mouth again. "Has anyone ever told you that you look like her? I swear, you two could be sisters."

I shook my head and smiled. "Get that all the time. Anyways, since it seems like she's clearly setting you up, how about I show you the floor upstairs? The CFO and vice president of the company both have their offices there, so you can meet them and talk to them about this if you want."

I waited for her to take the bait, and once she threw on that overly excited and malicious smile, I knew that she did.

_Oh, you poor, stupid little girl. If only you knew._

The elevator doors chimed open again once we'd reached the floor, Heidi and Gianna, Rosalie and Jasper's secretaries, smiling up at me. Of course, they knew the same amount as Angela, so they said hello and told me that they'd call Rosalie and Jasper to come out.

Rosalie Hale was the chief financial officer of Swan Enterprises, and basically my most treasured friend. I had met her in my final year at Harvard and our relationship sparked right then. The gorgeous and intimidating blonde kept many away, and her attitude got rid of the others. But when I first met her, I swear we just clicked. Even though we enjoyed competing against each other in our classes, it was always playful. She was the only other female that I'd gotten myself to trust after leaving Forks, having Alice been the only other one, and I barely spoke to her after I had left. There was the occasional email, but their regularity lessened as the years went by. She would email me at least once a month, but I would respond back very rarely. So getting close to Rosalie was hard for me, but I never doubted myself with her. She was hard on me, critiquing me where it was necessary. So the two of us discussed ideas which ultimately brought us to New York and Swan Enterprises. Finance was her forte, so that's what she stuck with. And as far as I knew, she loved her job, and that was more than okay with me.

Jasper was the vice-president of Swan Enterprises, and evidently, Rosalie's twin. The blonde locks and stunning looks that Rosalie donned were given to him as well. A McGill graduate, he joined Swan Enterprises a year ago after much hassling from Rosalie for me to give him a chance with the company. I wasn't planning on giving him any look over until he surprised me by walking in with Rosalie into my condo one afternoon, wearing a crisp pinstripe suit and presenting ideas to me that I never even had go through my head. I sat there, in shock over those ideas and that I was actually _in_ shock, and told him that he was hired. He initially looked forward to becoming head of operations, but I opted for him to become vice-president, which threw him into the shock I had felt.

And that's what made up the key corporate personnel of Swan Enterprises. Over the years, the two of them became my closest and most trusted friends. And they were the only two that knew about my past in Forks. They didn't know the entire story, mind you, especially not about my mother, but rather that I left Forks in a haste mainly due to a bad breakup. That's all they got, and that's all they settled for knowing that it was a touchy subject. My past was rarely discussed between us.

In fact, they were the only two who I allowed to call me Bella. It took so long for me to trust the both of them that I knew there was nothing to be worried about when it came down to it. Rosalie, Jasper and I were in it 'til the end, whenever that was.

The two of them both walked out of Rosalie's office, wearing similar black suits, the only difference being Rosalie's red blouse and Jasper's white shirt. As soon as they saw me, smirking beside Tanya, they wore similar grins.

"Lovely to see you here. Anything we can help you with?" Rosalie said sweetly, looking from me and to Tanya. Before I could say anything, Tanya outstretched her hand and shook Rosalie's and Jasper's quickly.

"Tanya Denali, pleasure to meet you both. Stacy here was showing me around for this secretary position I was offered, but I insisted on meeting the two of you, considering you're both clearly the ringleaders of Swan Enterprises."

I rolled my eyes at her blatant attempt to suck up to them and heard Jasper chuckle.

"I don't know about that, Miss Denali," He crooned, working up that southern accent of his that he knew had all the ladies melt. _Cue another eye roll._ "I would say that Isabella Swan would be the one up there, considering it's her baby and all."

"Of course!" She sputtered, trying to pull herself together when she realized that they weren't going to be outing me out so easy. "What I meant to say was, well I was telling Stacy that –"

"Hold on," Rosalie interrupted, raising her hand up. "Who's Stacy?"

_Ladies and gentlemen, let the games begin._

Tanya's mouth opened and closed several times, looking back and forth between me and Rosalie, eyes widening in confusion as she pointed at me. "Sh-she's Stacy."

Jasper let out a loud guffaw and I narrowed my eyes at him, silently telling him to hold himself together. For the love of God, the guy couldn't hold his own for five fucking minutes. He stopped laughing, chuckling quietly and looked back at Tanya.

"Sorry sweetheart, but she is definitely not Stacy. And I don't know what you're talking about with this secretary position, because as far as I know, Angela's not leaving her job anytime soon. Isabella here wouldn't let her go that easily."

His grin widened into a full blown smile when her breathing deepened, face flushing of all colour. Her eyebrow knitted as she let everything go through that little brain of hers, so I waited for her to hopefully make a proper conclusion about it all. A few moments after, she turned back to me and her eyes widened in fear.

"I-if you're not Stacy, th-then that means…" She gasped.

_Bingo._

"Well, what do we have here Jasper? Seems like Tanya here can put everything together without spreading her legs apart." I gasped dramatically. "Shocking."

I grinned as her jaw dropped and she looked frantically between us, mumbling rambles under her breath.

"Would you look at that, she's in complete shock. She really had no idea!" Rosalie laughed and I joined in with her.

"Yeah, you would think she'd recognize the face of the girl whose boyfriend she fucked at her own prom, and the same one who almost ripped her head off of her shoulders."

Tanya's head whipped back to me, face reddening as her eyes narrowed. "Listen here, you crazy bitch –"

"No, _you_ listen to _me!_" I snapped, her steps faltering backwards as I threw her off guard. "I don't give a damn about what you think, or what you plan on saying to prove yourself to me. As far as I know, you were a worthless whore back then and you still are now. But aside from that, you walked into a prestigious corporation's doors and mouthed off the CEO whatever chance you had, having God knows how many people hear you. Not to mention her secretary, CFO and vice-president. How fucking _stupid_ are you?"

I flexed my fists again, trying to push away the urge to punch her and ruin all those dollars spent to all of that Botox. "You've just ruined whatever reputation you had. You could've done what you did in some no name company walls and possibly gotten away with it, but you did it here. In Swan Enterprises. You have no idea what you've done. And you also have no idea what I dealt with during my childhood and obviously don't give a fuck, considering you jumped my boyfriend in the bedroom of someone who you didn't even know."

I stepped towards her, scowling at her when she stumbled backwards again and almost tripping over her own feet. I saw Jasper step towards me to hold me back from actually attacking her, which I was pretty sure I was about to do if I didn't control myself, but I raised my hand towards him and stopped him in his tracks.

"So not only is your reputation completely useless to my company, but you've also brought it upon yourself to spread about as much pathetic rumours about me as you could possibly conjure. In your hopes in ruining my career, you failed to realize that I'm untouchable, and ruined your own career instead. So, for that, you have no interview. In fact, consider your degree worthless, along with your resume and references. Your future in this field as you know, it is _over_."

Tanya let out all the air she'd been holding as her face flushed again, stance completely slumped over in defeat. I felt my anger slowly dissipate, letting my smug expression take over.

"Now, unless you'd like your face plastered all over the daily news for being escorted off of the premises, I suggest you get the _fuck_ out of my building."

Her eyes darted back to Rosalie and Jasper, who were wearing similar disgusted expressions before looking back at me.

"This isn't over," She threatened under her breath and my self-satisfied grin widened.

"I would hope not. There's still more where that came from."

She opened her mouth once more, but shut it as I saw the glassy look in her eyes as she stared off distantly before walking back into the elevator. Once the doors closed, the four people around me broke out into applause.

Damn, it felt good being Isabella Swan.

* * *

How was that little taste of revenge? Delicious? A bit much? Let me know what you think!  
As always, reviews get a nice teaser in their inbox :)


	3. Photographs and Memories

A/N: As done in the past, any chapters that have specific outfits will be linked to my profile. Look under Forever and Always for this chapters outfits as well as the next. They will be written under 'Chapter 4'.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

**_Chapter 3_**

**_Photographs and Memories_**

_I keep your picture by my bed for when I'm feeling sad.  
And I don't know why I would be.  
The way your smile looks so real.  
I feel like I could start to understand your grace.  
And I don't understand why you're not here with me.  
And I don't even wanna know where else you'd be._

_I need you back, I need you back,  
I need you here.  
I need your smile, I need your eyes,  
I need you dear.  
Cause every line on your face makes a beautiful maze  
For my eyes to trace._

"Photographs and Memories" by Jason Reeves

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

"I swear, you should've seen her face. Priceless!" Jasper burst out into laughter again, causing Rosalie and I to both roll our eyes.

"Jasper, pretty sure we were both standing right there. We got it, it was funny," Rosalie sighed. It wouldn't have surprised me if she was regretting introducing Jasper to me in the first place.

Apparently Jasper wasn't done yet, however. "Funny? It was hilarious! Do you remember when she-"

I groaned, pinching the bridge of my nose. "Jasper, you're killing me. And definitely killing the moment too. Seriously."

"Sorry Bella," He said, pulling off his signature puppy dog look. "But in my defense, it's not every day we get some good girl-on-girl around here. Hell, I was getting excited watching you two at it!"

I knew better than to think Jasper was being innocent, but the undertone of what he was saying gave it all away. "You, are a pervert." I pointed at Jasper before looking at Rosalie. "Never again am I hiring anyone remotely related to you."

Rosalie sighed and shook her head. "Trust me, I won't be making that mistake again." She looked down at her watch. "We should be heading out soon to get ready. We're still riding together, right?"

"Yeah, the driver will pick you up first Rose, then me and Jasper's the last stop," I said, nodding before narrowing my eyes at Jasper. "Let's not have a repeat of last time, yeah?"

Jasper scoffed and crossed his arms around his chest, glaring back at me. "Oh, what the fuck ever. A guy throws up one time and you two are on his ass forever. How was I supposed to know my stomach couldn't handle alcohol and limo driving? It was my first damn time!"

Rosalie and I exchanged the same amused look and burst out laughing. I quickly said my goodbyes, reminding them to be ready on time for tonight before heading back to my office. Angela was still in so I sent her home considering I was about to head out anyways. Plus, I needed her energy by my side tonight. She seemed grateful, but a little anxious as well so I asked her what was up. Turns out, Angela was getting pretty serious with her boyfriend Ben and was hoping he'd be able to attend the gala tonight. Ben was also in the business scene as well, though I hadn't been informed of all the information by Angela yet, but I couldn't really say no to her. The fact that I could ask her to do anything for me and she'd do it with no questions asked was really important to me. Not in the way that I liked her doing what I said and when, but more that it was really warming when she trusted me as much as she did.

I told her to call and add his name to the list before she left, but to remember that she was to fulfill her duties first before anything else, which she automatically accepted to. Not like I really had to explain it to her, but a quick reminder was good. I left her to finish off what she had to do and walked into my office, sitting back into my chair. Glancing at the time and figuring it was good to call, I pressed the first number on my speed dial and leaned back into my chair.

"Chief Swan."

I couldn't help but laugh at his gruff formality, but worry a bit at how tired he sounded. "Well, that takes care of asking how you are. Seems like you're having some day, Dad."

A deep chuckle came through the line and I smiled, my worry easing a little bit. "Was. It's a whole lot better now that I get to hear my baby girl's voice."

"Jeez, Dad. And they wonder where I get my charm from." I teased, smiling wider when I got an even louder laugh out of him.

"Alright, enough kidding around. How've you been?"

And that's how our conversations always were. No matter how long it had been since I'd seen my dad, we'd always have conversations as if we saw each other the day before. Other than the catching up, of course. It was always the same, and I loved it. Our relationship had only strengthened since Renee had left, or rather gotten kicked out of our lives for good. He was my rock, the one person that kept me grounded and sane really, especially now with everything I had going for me. Not only that, but he was the one that kept me going when I thought I couldn't. More during the time after my rough breakup with Edward, really.

And to be honest, it made me appreciate him so much more. But, at the same time, hurt when I couldn't be with him as much as I wanted. Sure, I had my own jet and could fly out whenever I could, but I just had no time for anything anymore. I made it a personal goal to see him at least once a month, if not more. I hadn't seen him for a couple of weeks, and the phone call with him now was digging into me even more, especially considering I'd missed his birthday. The first time I ever had missed his birthday. We had a routine for our birthdays. It was never big, just the two of us. I'd cook dinner, even on my birthday considering the best he could do was make cereal, and we'd just spend time with each other. We'd wake up in the morning, take the entire day off, and just lounge around in our pajamas for the entire day.

Those were the two most important days to me, and I missed his already.

I guess he realized that I was zoning out during the conversation when he stopped halfway through his story of his fishing weekend and asked if I was alright.

I sighed, feeling vulnerable for the first time in the longest I could remember. "I missed your birthday, Dad."

I could hear him take a deep breath in and out, a habit of his when he'd try to channel his emotions. "It's alright, baby girl. We'll do something together when you come down again. It's just a day, no big deal."

From the tone of his voice, I knew he was trying to comfort me, even though he was hurting too. I felt the prickling of tears forming, but for once, not bothering to push them away.

"Dad, it's not just a day. It's more than that, so much more," I sniffled, my voice cracking at the end.

"Bella, what's wrong?" He asked, concerned as usual.

I shook my head, even though he obviously couldn't see me. "I just miss you, Dad."

"I miss you too, baby girl. But I know there's more to it. Talk to me."

I took in a deep breath and sighed, looking around my office. It wasn't all too simple, but it was professional. I had very few personal items, just a picture of my dad and me at my graduation. And then another with Rosalie and Jasper several months back at an event that we had, its cause in support of the Children's Aid Society. It was one of my greatest achievements, raising more money for them that they had gotten in years. I figured that even though I couldn't save myself all those years back, I could help to save other kids.

But other than that, there was nothing. There were no pictures of me smiling with family members, or any other photos of loved ones. There was nothing, and it made me feel so empty.

"I just… I just don't know about me sometimes, Dad," I began, running my finger down the frame holding the picture of us. "I love my career and I love where it's taking me. But I just miss being me sometimes. I miss you. I miss being _home_. It's all so overwhelming at times."

I knew he understood what I meant about being home, not just physically there. I missed feeling like I was home, instead of feeling like I was somewhere completely alien to me. It was a feeling that had been slowly building since I had left Forks, but I kept ignoring it. But I couldn't help but spill to him now. I didn't know why it was now, out of all the other times I had talked to him, so I assumed my heart was just aching now because I missed his birthday.

"Bella, I understand completely. But you need to know that I am so very proud of you, sweetheart. What you've accomplished in your life is infinite times more than I had ever dreamed for you. You're a fighter, baby girl. You've always been a fighter. And when times are hard, you just keep doing what you've always been doing and keep on throwing those punches. Hell, they're probably harder now with all of those damn kickboxing classes you've been taking."

I couldn't help but laugh. Figures he'd pull his own jokes to make me feel better. It was yet another thing I loved about my dad. Always needed to throw humour in when he could, but it always worked.

"I know it's hard, Bella. I know you wish you could be home, but sometimes there are more important things. And I promise, we'll make up for all the time lost when we get together again. You just keep your head up and everything will work out."

I sighed and wiped away the tears on my cheeks. "Thanks Dad. I really don't know what I'd do without you."

"Hey, what can I say? Your old man's got skills."

We both burst out in laughter, and I didn't even have it in me to tell him not to ever say that again. After a hesitant goodbye, and a promise for me to call tomorrow to fill him in on the gala, we hung up the line. I checked my makeup in my washroom, adjusting myself to look somewhat presentable before filing everything away and gathering my belongings before heading home.

My condo was one of the best in New York. I didn't want to indulge all that much like the celebrities that lived in New York, but I definitely wanted a place that I wouldn't get sick of in a few months. Not only that, but I wanted a home that I could have as my own safe haven. One where I'd have everything at my fingertips, regardless if it was in my house or just outside. So, yeah, I spent a good fortune on my condo now, but it was so, _so_ worth it.

Seriously, the fucking epitome of amazing.

Yes… I loved my condo.

Four bedrooms, not like I needed any other than the master bedroom, personal gym, swimming pool, large balcony which had a beautiful patio and Jacuzzi, huge kitchen, yadda yadda yadda.

Like I said, epitome of amazing.

Did I say I loved it already? Oh, yeah, I did. But seriously, I couldn't have found anything more perfect.

Well, other than the fact that it was almost always empty what with me working so much. And considering that Rosalie, Jasper and my dad were the only people to be in it other than me. And my real estate agent, of course. Not like that really mattered anyways.

I tried to clear my head away of my loneliness, pissed off at myself for feeling like I did at the same time. I didn't like having silly issues like that take me away from things that were much more important. I thought I had grown up from feeling sorry for myself, but apparently things weren't as easy as I had thought. But it just meant that I had to work harder for it.

Grabbing a quick bite to eat, I showered and started preparing myself for the gala tonight. My dress had been hanging in my closet for the last couple of days and I smiled just looking at it. It was gorgeous, a deep blue strapless gown with gold and silver beads and sequins outlining the front portion of it. The back was bare other than the wide tie across the centre of my back. It had taken forever for me to find something that I had actually liked. My smile slowly faded as a memory of shopping with Alice suddenly flooded through my mind. It had been so easy shopping with her back then, as if she really had some sort of psychological gift when it came to fashion. Before I knew it, I wondered how long it would've taken if Alice had helped me.

_Bella, get your shit together._

What was going on with me? I didn't understand why all of these memories and holes from my past were being brought up once more all of a sudden, but it was extremely frustrating. I didn't want to feel like that childish, weak teenager again. I was a new person, a grown fucking woman. What in the hell was wrong with me?

I ended up trying to stop think of anything that had to do with my past, and instead focused on getting myself ready for the gala tonight.

Finishing off after doing my hair and makeup, as well as throwing on my outfit for the night, I applied the last touches of my makeup before stepping back and looking at my reflection.

The years between high school and now had done well to my body. The skinny, simple looking girl had grown up to become a curvy natural beauty. I wasn't conceited, but hell, you _know_ when you look good. And I did. And even if I didn't, the men around me would make sure I figured it out some way or another.

The physical image of myself did help with my career, but it wasn't the thing that I was proud of most. It was my strength with everything else. I had more knowledge related to my career than anyone else. I was a solid entity in the business field, my smart decisions impacting millions. Not only that, but I was respected by just as many because of my work. Because I was tough, headstrong, and had a great mindset to follow with. All things that lacked when I was younger.

But, just looking at myself and all the things I had, I couldn't help but feel like I lacked. I had billions under my name, people who admired me, and a career any student would dream of. But I just felt like there was something missing. I knew I missed my dad, and that was one reason behind the empty feeling, but there was always that something else. I only wished I knew what it was so I could fix it, something I was always used to doing since I was a little kid. But I was on my own with this one. I just had to wait it out and see where it would lead me.

Tonight though, I couldn't let that feeling swallow me whole. Tonight was another milestone for Swan Enterprises. Delegates from around the globe were flying into the city, preparing themselves for the gala, organized by the company. Tonight was a new beginning for Swan Enterprises.

If only I knew how big of a beginning it would be for me rather than the rest.

If only I really knew my past was eagerly waiting for me.

Tonight, it would all come back.

* * *

Uh oh. Thoughts? As always, share me some love and I'll give you some back in a nice teaser form!


	4. Running Up That Hill

A/N: It's a bit concerning after reading some reviews. Many of you are calling Bella out for being a huge bitch, which she may be to a certain extent, but it doesn't exactly shape her entirely. She's put up those walls for a reason, remember that. When you've been hurt once, you make sure not to be hurt that way again, hence the hard front. Trust me, that's not the only thing about her. Thank you to everyone for your reviews, I hope you enjoyed your teasers!

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

**_Chapter 4_**

**_Running Up That Hill_**

_You don't wanna hurt me,  
But see how deep the bullet lies.  
Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.  
There's a thunder in our hearts, baby.  
So much hate for the ones we love?  
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?_

"Running Up That Hill" by Placebo

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

I loved the summer weather in New York. Well, more like the end of summer really. It wasn't all that hot, nothing that I wasn't uncomfortable with really, but it was actually perfect. Not too hot, but with a light breeze that kept you at the right temperature regardless of what you were wearing.

Luckily, for Rosalie and I, that meant that there was no need for some bulky coat to hide our dresses.

Rosalie always had impeccable taste, and the gala tonight was just another reason for her to show it off. Her gown was floor-length and red, which was inevitably her favourite colour, with a cinched waist and bare back other than the few straps running across it to show off her flawless body and curves, and a low neckline to show off the rest. I swear, she had the most perfect cleavage, and that shit was all natural too. It was obvious that all the other women around her would get jealous about it, but really, Rosalie would just eat that shit up for dinner.

Nothing boosted up Rosalie's ego than some good, healthy jealousy.

Our driver, Tyler, had opened up the sunroof of the limo when I'd asked him, allowing the breeze to come in. It was really much too soothing, and that was exactly what I'd needed after the rough day I had earlier. And it did help, other than this weird feeling I had in the pit of my stomach, but I just ignored that as much as I could.

We stopped in front of Jasper's building and waited for God knows how long until he dragged himself into the limo, wearing a form fitting black suit and black tie. Of course, being the charmer he is, he wore his shirt in his favourite colour as well – light blue. Why? Apparently it brings out his eyes. If I hadn't walked in on him fucking some brunette in my living room, I would've seriously questioned his sexuality. Then again, I'm pretty sure I was ready to kill him for somehow bringing that broad into my condo in the first place. According to him, my condo was a real 'pussy magnet'.

What did I learn through that experience? Never again ask Jasper Hale to watch your condo while you were halfway across the world. A rabid dog would've probably done a better job.

"Ladies, you're both looking absolutely stunning tonight," Jasper crooned as he sat down before earning himself a resounding smack upside his head. "Ow! What the fuck, Rose?"

"What the fuck? What the _fuck_?" She seethed, glaring at him with as much intensity as she could. "While the two of us have been sitting here waiting for your stupid ass to hurry up so we're not late, you're taking your sweet time to finish primping like you're going on a date with a new boyfriend. _That's _what the fuck!"

I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from laughing at their sibling rivalry as they bickered back and forth. It was funny how they could be so similar, yet so different at the same time. While Rosalie acted like the uptown New York woman, Jasper would never get rid of his southern roots.

Their arguing grew on me sooner or later, making me feel a little more like I was with family rather than just friends. And hell, that was exactly what I needed in this city. You could really get yourself lost here, and I mean in more ways than one. There were more ways to fuck up in New York than in Los Angeles. But they kept me grounded and I was thankful for it, regardless how many times they made me want to pull my hair out and scream in frustration.

I figured I'd been daydreaming for longer than I'd thought when the limo stopped and the flashes of cameras started to hit the windows. Thank God for the tint job, because there was so way in hell we would be able to recover if people really saw what was going on inside of the limo. I could already imagine the front cover of the papers, announcing how the straight-laced executives of one of, if not the most prestigious corporations in the entire world really acted like a bunch of immature morons.

Well, that comment went more towards Jasper. But they still wouldn't give it up if they ever heard me mutter the word 'fuck' in public.

So we always made sure to keep up our front when we were in attendance to big events like the Swan Enterprises gala tonight. And by looking back at Rosalie and Jasper, I realized I would have to remind them on that.

_Yet again._

"Okay, settle down. Rose, do a quick check before we go in. Other than your face being a bit redder from all that hollering, you're good," I informed her as she quickly pulled out a compact mirror from her clutch and got to work, then turning to Jasper. "Jasper, fix your tie, it's crooked. And your hair. Damn, stop pulling it so much when you get mad or else you'll be bald by thirty."

He grabbed Rosalie's compact from her hand and frantically checked his hair in it before smirking back up at me. "Hair or no hair, I'd still be sexy at thirty." I rolled my eyes at him but couldn't hold back the slight upturn of the corner of my lip. "Oh come on, Bella. Admit it. You think I'm sexy."

Okay, so I may have thought Jasper was beyond gorgeous when I first met him. But there was no way I was going to get into it with him. First of all, he was Rosalie's brother, and that was just wrong. Second, he was going to be the vice-president of my company. There was no way in hell that I would risk my company over some guy. And third, well, there were things about him that just reminded me of memories that I wished I could just bury and spit on.

_But if only it were that easy._

"Bellaaaa," Jasper drawled, trying his own stupid Southern charm on me.

"Oh, for the love of God," I rolled my eyes and laughed. "Yes, Jasper, you are sexy. Those other guys have nothing on you. Now are you two done? We need to get out before they start making shit up on why we were taking so long."

"Ugh, don't remind me," Rosalie shuddered. "Remember when they said we were having some sick threesome?"

Jasper and I returned her shudder and got up to leave before he brought up the headline again. _"Incest: not always as bad as it looks!"_

The flashes were blinding, as usual, but we were used to it. A few poses here, some smiles there, a handful of questions answered. But as I stood there, I took it all in like it was a new experience.

This here was what I was good at. _This_ was me. I wasn't some insecure, inexperienced girl. Hell no. I was Isabella fucking Swan. That's right, and this was all mine.

The luxurious life. The perfect fantasy career right at my fingertips.

All mine.

I was the one that worked for it, to have all of this. And I made my own dreams come true.

My smile widened as I felt more like myself than I had in a while, cueing the photographers to take even more pictures. I could hear them all around me, calling my attention from different angles to catch a picture perfect shot.

It should've been overwhelming, but in some strange way, it was entirely comforting.

I turned back and signaled for Rosalie and Jasper to head inside. There wasn't a single event where we would attend separately. We'd always stick together, no matter where it was. And that's why event holders realized that if you wanted one of our attendance, you'd have to make it for all three of us. We would enter and leave together, stick close when we could, and charm the living daylights out of these people.

Not only did you need to have a strong company, but you needed to have strong figures leading it. And that's exactly what Swan Enterprises had.

I could already feel the eyes on us once we'd walked into the building, holding several of the best men and women in the field of business. Many would dream to step foot into a gala held by my corporation, especially those who were still new in the field. It was a strong starting point. Not only would you be within the walls of the building holding one of the most prestigious gala's known to man, but would also be surrounded by the best of the best.

However, they had no idea of what the reason was behind the gala exactly. I had a new project to show, but it was extremely confidential. Rosalie and Jasper didn't even know about it, it was something that I had wanted to work on myself. I wanted to see the outcome first before putting any planning into action. Really, it was that big. It would've been unbearable to see such a powerful innovation to be put into work, only to see it fail.

I wasn't going to settle for any failure. Not now, not ever. I'd had enough failure to deal with through my life as it was, and I wasn't going to start dealing with it again now.

So that's what made this gala even more important than the rest. Of course, like I said, it was secret so no one really knew what it was exactly about. Rather, they knew I had it completely under wraps but that it was one that they needed to be in attendance for.

Angela had immediately settled to my side once she saw me enter, giving me a quick brief of how everything was going. Of course, so far so good, and I was only hoping for it to get better.

Hell, with the mood I was in, there was no need to hope. I had everything under control. Or so I thought.

"Okay Miss Swan, you have about ten to fifteen minutes before your speech," Angela informed me, listening in to the others on her headset. "Would you prefer to just relax first, or should we go through the guests?"

I looked around at the full building and nodded towards her. "Let's start getting rid of some names. I don't think I can handle dealing with them all at once."

Smirking at her, she did the same and started leading me through everyone, whispering in my ear when someone would approach me. It was the usual, of course. I didn't have the patience to remember every single person I dealt with through the company, rather just the ones that were actually important. And those were slim as it was. So, considering the fact that Angela basically had photographic memory or something, she was the pro on the guest list.

A waiter walked by, offering champagne which I accepted though Angela hadn't. Always professional, that girl. Angela was one to deal with business first, which meant helping me go through what I needed to before she would go off and enjoy herself. I really had no idea how I managed to snag her.

She leaned over and I could hear the sudden nervousness in her voice. "Demetri Volturi, Miss Swan."

_Fuck. And I was in a good mood, too._

I plastered on a fake smile as Demetri walked towards me, but hell, did he look _good_. He had the most masculine body, broad shoulders and slightly narrower waist compared to it, making a perfect v-shaped body. He was tall, though not much taller than average, but taller than me regardless. He was always one to go slightly more casual than others, still wearing his full black suit but instead of pulling everything together with a tie, his white shirt underneath was unbuttoned slightly, the start of his muscled chest slightly peeking out. And just for God to tease me even more, he gave Demetri the most beautiful face ever, blueish grey eyes striking out against the chiseled cheekbones and strong jaw line.

God, he was gorgeous.

But at the same time, he was complete asshole.

And really, I had dealt with enough handsome yet completely fucking arrogant men in my lifetime.

Since the first time I had met Demetri, he had pulled every single trick in the bag to try to get with me somehow. I had to stifle my laugh when I remembered the shocked look on his face when I showed no interest and turned him down that first time. But if only he would get it. I was like a game for Demetri, the one who resisted him, which made him want even more. He would somehow weasel his way into getting into any events held by Swan Enterprises and seek me out. I swear, he was almost like a bloodhound with how quick he'd track out and find me, no matter where I was.

And to make matters so much worse, Demetri Volturi was the son of world-renowned Aro Volturi, CEO of Volturi Industries. The only actual competition I really had to worry about, and the only one that's done anything possible to get their nasty, pathetic hands on my work. Seriously, I couldn't even count how many moles I had since Swan Enterprises was first up and running. The part that pissed Aro off the most though, was the fact that only one of them actually managed to get anything before I figured it all out. And let's just say that I had my doubts before, so I did some planning with a fake project. Except, Aro didn't know that.

So, in all, Demetri Volturi was this unbelievably sexy, God of a man that wanted me in every way possible. And in some way, I wanted him too, just for a good fuck if that, really. Everything was great, other than the fact that he was a giant asshole _and_ the son of yet an even bigger asshole. Two very major turn offs.

"Isabella." His eyes darkened slightly as he raked them up and down my body, but I couldn't help but smirk at how obvious he made it. "Don't you look absolutely edible."

"Subtle, Demetri," I laughed. "Let's keep this professional, no?"

"Oh, you know I'm all business, Isabella," He cooed. "But I am a firm believer in mixing business with a little pleasure. Do you agree?"

He was gazing at me with a little too much intensity, but nothing I wasn't used to really. Problem was, this wasn't the time or place for any of that. And as much as he wanted to make me squirm, I wasn't going to stand there and take it from him.

"I do, actually." I grinned when I saw his eyes light up in excitement, thinking that I was really finally giving into him. "I get all the pleasure I need with my business. As you can see, not only does it bring in the largest amount of money, but it also brings in the most well-known business figures. In a way, I give myself pleasure."

Cue the not-so-subtle shifting of legs and slight tightening of pants.

I really couldn't wipe the smug grin off my face. "Speaking of business, I have much to take care of."

Demetri's face contorted into a mix of rejection and anger, an expression that I had grown well-accustomed to. "Yes, we'll have to do this again soon," He said, and I nodded in agreement, though I was definitely not going to be taking that offer up anytime soon.

Turning around, Angela let out a deep whoosh and her shoulders slumped. "Damn, that was close."

"Tell me about it." I nodded, finishing off the rest of my champagne. "But you know me, Angela. I won't be giving in that easy."

She laughed and winked. "Of course not, Miss Swan."

The waiter walked by once more, and my hand reached out for another glass of champagne. Hell, after what I'd just dealt with, I needed it. After a few more guests done with, Angela leaned over once more.

"Um, okay, this one is new," She stuttered and I gazed towards her to see her brows knitted in frustration. "I can't remember the first name, but I know for sure that the last is Cullen. Mr. Cullen, that's him right there."

I felt the glass slip out of my fingertips before Angela whipped her hand up to steady it. I closed my eyes tightly, to the point where it almost hurt, and prayed.

_No. Please, God, no. Not here, not now, not ever._

I could hear Angela calling me and asking if I was alright, but I tuned her out, as well as everything else around me. At that point, I just wanted to be invisible.

"Bella?" I heard the recognizable voice call my name, but it wasn't the one I was dreading.

Opening my eyes and whipping my head towards him, I was looking straight at the familiar blonde-haired man from my past.

"Carlisle," I said softly, standing frozen in my spot because at that point, I had no idea what to do, or how to act. I was fucking _lost_. Angela had taken the glass from me, probably worried that I would've dropped it again, which I had no doubt that I would've.

It was hard enough not keeping in touch with Alice over the years, even though there were times where I'd just wanted to give in. But I couldn't, everything reminded me too much of Edward, of all the years between us. But right then, looking at Carlisle and seeing those same features he had passed onto his son as well, my heart was absolutely aching to the point where I could feel it.

All those stupid emotions I had came rushing back and I instinctively pushed them down. I wasn't going to do this again, especially not now when I'd gotten this far.

"Bella," He said again, smiling this time. "I can't tell you how good it is to see you."

And at that moment, I ignored the screaming protests in my head and walked towards him, wrapping my arms around his waist and putting my cheek on his chest. His arms went around me, and I could feel him take in a deep breath and let it out slowly, tightening his grip slightly. I recovered a bit and began to pull away; a little embarrassed with how I had reacted to him being here and with how I reacted with all these people around me.

"It's been too long, Carlisle," I said, giving him a small smile even though I wasn't sure if our relationship would still be as strong as it used to be. "I had no idea you were invited. How is everyone? Is Esme here?"

He frowned slightly and shook his head. "No, it's just myself as well as Alice and –"

"Bella?" I heard another familiar voice call my name, or rather, shriek it before I felt the entire weight of someone's body on me.

"Alice!" I hissed, looking around at the new attention we were gathering.

Alice pulled back, her smile fading as she looked back at me sadly. "Sorry! It's not like I haven't seen you in years, or anything."

I lost the earlier smile I had from seeing her again. "Alice, please…" I trailed off, not exactly knowing what to say to that.

"Alice, that's enough," Carlisle said firmly, settling that for me as Alice solemnly nodded towards his direction before recovering again.

"Damn, Bella!" She pulled back, still holding onto my hands so she could get a good look at me, at the same time letting me do the same to her. Alice always had impeccable taste, and seeing her just showed it off once more. Her dress was beautiful, hugging her petite curves and draping down to just above her knees. It dipped down into a v-neck cut, an empire waist highlighting her features. The metallic colouring matched perfectly, as well as the different textures of material. "Don't you look like you just came off the New York runway. And trust me, I would know!"

I laughed and shook my head. "That's not important. What is important is how you're both here at the gala."

"Well, if you would've read my last email I sent you, you would know," She said softly, but waving me off as I started to explain somehow to her. "Never mind, you were probably busy. Anyways, we're here because of you."

A waiter walked by us once more, giving them each a glass as I took mine back from Angela.

Carlisle probably noted the confusion on my face and stepped in. "To be honest with you, Bella, Alice was the only one who knew that. I speak for myself and the others when I say that I had no idea that you were behind Swan Enterprises. You've done extremely well for yourself, I'm so proud of you. It's hard to believe that same young lady from Forks that I'd grown to love as my own child has made herself into this astoundingly successful women in front of me."

I felt my cheeks heat as I blushed, the first time in… well, shit, I couldn't even remember.

"Hey, that same Forks girl is still in there. That blush proves it!" Alice teased as we all let out laughs, becoming more comfortable with each other. And as strange as it was, especially with how easy it seemed, it was oddly consoling and yet, extremely confusing. The lonely mood and emptiness I had felt earlier had just completely disappeared when I was around them.

But, before I could even figure that feeling out, I felt my chest slightly tighten and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. It was the same familiar feeling I had felt years before, and all the dread came back to me at full speed.

"Hey, what'd I miss?" The same velvet voice rang through my ears, louder than spoken.

Instinctively, my body turned slightly to face him, meeting the same piercing, emerald eyes that had me hooked since I'd first seen them. But they weren't the same; the usual vibrant green was duller, completely lost of life and replaced with pain. The next thing I heard, replacing the ringing of his voice in my ears, was the shattering of the glass that left my hand.

"Excuse me," I whispered, spinning around and bolting, getting as far away from Edward Cullen as I could.

* * *

He's baaaack! Did any of you expect that? Shocker!

As always, reviews = teasers!


	5. Everything We Had

A/N: Hey loves. Just an update on why this chapter has taken so long, and why the following chapters will have uneven and length gaps between updates. My grandfather unexpectedly passed away at the end of January, so it's basically left my family and I in pieces. Needless to say, my focus on writing has decreased drastically and has impacted this update and will also impact those to come. Just giving you all a heads up so you're not wondering where the hell I've gone.  
Thanks to beegurl13 for polishing this chapter up and making it look good.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 5**_

_**Everything We Had**_

_Well, you saw for yourself  
The way it played out  
For you, I am blinded  
For you, I am blinded  
For you_

_I am no gentleman  
I can be a prick  
And I do regret more than I admit_

_You have been followed  
Back to same place I  
Sat with you drink for drink  
Take the pain out of love  
And then love won't exist_

_Everything we had  
Everything we had  
Everything we had  
Everything we had  
Is no longer there, longer there_

"Everything We Had" by The Academy Is…

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

Going as fast as I could in my heels and with Angela trailing behind me, I managed to get myself to the women's restroom without having a panic attack. Well, not necessarily a panic attack; in my case that would have involved hyperventilating, nausea, and that other crap. It was more like I was seconds away from punching my fist through the nearest wall.

Anger issues, remember?

Growing up, and especially after leaving Forks, I had no doubt that my anger issues must've been hereditary or something. Like mother like daughter, right?

Pathetic.

Angela closed the door behind her and locked it, scurrying around the restroom to make sure it was empty, which thankfully it was. I was at the point where I probably would've lost it on some random person if they were in there and I was in no mood to deal with the press that would come with the unprovoked beat down. Once everything was clear, she stood a few feet away from me and waited. The poor girl knew what I was dealing with. Well, not the fucked up part with me seeing Edward, but the part that I was seconds away from flipping the fuck out. Let's just say she witnessed the one time someone made the mistake on grabbing my wrist when I was in a similar emotional situation. Hell, they were only trying to comfort me, but my brain didn't manage to process that.

One thing led to another—in other words, really sore knuckles, a hospital trip, and an almost-lawsuit.

I sat down on one of the small loveseats, wondering why the fuck they would decorate a washroom like it was a goddamn family room. For Christ sakes, washrooms were meant for dealing with your business and fixing your make up, not for a goddamn tea time.

My shit-hazy mind began to clear and I suddenly remembered that I seriously cursed like a fucking sailor during these clearly fan-fucking-tastic breakdowns.

I tried focusing on taking deep breaths in through my nose and exhaling them out my mouth, though that all went to shit pretty quickly. My hands were trembling so I clasped them together so that they'd stop, but with no success whatsoever. I was at the point where even my shaking hands were pissing me off, so I grabbed the sofa upholstery on each side of my thighs. Hard. Hard enough for my knuckles to be even whiter than my pale skin naturally was.

The entire situation was completely _fucked_.

Simply, yet blatantly put.

Seeing Carlisle and Alice was hard, but I knew I could handle it. I only managed to break slightly when I saw Carlisle, but there was a quick recovery which would've followed with short chat and then I'd make my own exit shortly after, going on with my regular life. It was nothing I couldn't deal with and move on from.

But now, now that Edward had fucking strolled into our conversation like any other day, all those plans had been completely shot to shit. All of those years that I'd spent convincing myself that he was nothing to me, and legitimately believing that, were completely bullshit once I heard his voice. Hell, I could barely even _look_ at him!

It wasn't helping now, considering I was basically making permanent marks into the seat with how hard I was clenching it. Plus the memories of feeling like such a failure and coward were _not_ settling down my red-hazed anger either.

I looked up to see Angela fidgeting nervously with the material of her dress, her eyes shooting to the door and back to me several times which, of course, just pissed me off even more.

"Will you fucking stop with fidgeting already?" I seethed, making her jump back towards the wall and eyes widen in fear. "If you can't handle it, then get the fuck out!"

There was no guilt for what I'd done, or any other emotion that I could possibly feel at all. There was only anger. That was the only feeling my body understood, and it was literally consuming me.

Angela's hand slowly shot out to reach for the door knob before there was a loud knock on the door. She jumped again and looked back at me, unsure of what to do. I was seconds away from flipping on her again before another knock, though louder this time, came through.

"Isabella, open the door." Angela immediately jolted to unlock the door, letting Rosalie in and slipping out after Rosalie motioned for her to do so.

I focused on my breathing again while Rosalie locked the door behind her and stood in front of me, crossing her arms across her chest. Knowing Rosalie, and having gone through this with her many more times than I had with Angela, I knew she was waiting for me to start explaining. But this wasn't like any of the countless times before. This time…well this time it was completely different—_I_ was completely different. I was right at my breaking point, and the knowledge of what I could do in front of all of these people scared me.

"He's here. Edward, he's right here in this goddamn building," I said through clenched teeth, getting nothing but silence from her and a face void of any emotion. "Jesus fuck Rosalie, are you a fucking mute?"

Well, it wasn't void of any emotion now.

"Don't you start directing your shit on me, Bella. I don't give a fuck how angry you are, I'm not planning on standing here and taking it from you." She spat all in one breath, and took a moment to take in a few deep breaths to calm herself down before addressing me again. "I heard you loud and clear. I'm just waiting for your explanation."

"Explanation to what?" I was beginning to want Angela to come back because all Rosalie had done was make me even more furious.

Rosalie rolled her eyes, sighing as if it was the most obvious fucking thing in the world. "Explanation to why you're sitting here, about to strangle the next living thing that walks by you."

"I just fucking told you," I said as I managed to clench my hands even harder, to the point where it actually hurt, but the pain was strangely comforting. "The one person that I gave _everything_ to, that I actually thought I loved, only to walk in on him fucking some whore on _my_ prom night…he's _here_."

I stood up and starting pacing, stretching out my aching fingers while suppressing the need to throw something across the washroom. Before I could entirely control myself, my hand reached out to grip one of the flower vases sitting on the counter. I picked it up and chucked it at the wall, watching it shatter into a million pieces.

_Nothing_ was working. Nothing was helping me calm down and I honestly believed that I was just about ready to have a heart attack with how hard my heart was beating. I turned to face Rosalie again, surprised that she was looking at me with a sort of nonchalant expression, her eyebrow quirked as she shrugged her shoulder.

"So what?"

Those two simple words stopped me in my tracks, physically and emotionally.

_So what?_

Edward was here, right in this very building only feet away from me. I spent my entire childhood with him, and grew up with him and his family. For years I had shared the same experiences with him and had confided in only him whenever my mother hurt me. Many of the teenage experiences were entirely shared with him. I loved him, gave him my all, and dreamed of spending my entire life with him.

That was then, that was when I was a child—a teenager. I had matured quickly, especially after having dealt with all that Renee had done to me, but I was still naïve. I was blinded by love, as pathetic as it sounded, but that was a long time ago. It was not now, and I wasn't that person anymore.

So what if he was here? He meant nothing to me. He was a part of my past; a part of my past that I had long forgotten about and dealt with. Of course I didn't care about him, I hated him—there was nothing left in me for Edward Cullen.

_So what?_

"Exactly." Rosalie answered. Apparently I hadn't only thought that last one, instead I murmured it aloud. "So what if he's here. What does that mean for you? Nothing. You're still Isabella Swan. You're still the intelligent, insanely successful, and not to mention fuck-hot, CEO of Swan Enterprises, who manages to beat out any competition that is stupid enough to try with you. So what that he's here, because that changes nothing."

I stared at her long and hard, letting all of what I'd thought and she'd said go through my head. She was right. I was right. Before I knew it, my lips quirked up in a grin.

"You know I fucking love you, right?"

Her face matched the same expression as mine as she let out a chuckle. "You damn well better. The shit I do for you. Seriously, I basically walked right into hell itself right now." I laughed at her and gave her a tight hug which she returned immediately. "Now come on, time for you to dazzle these rich snobs."

I double-checked my appearance in the mirror, making sure I didn't look like I just came out of some horror movie before walking back into the hall with Rosalie by my side. Angela was waiting outside, still a little jittery when she initially saw us, but quickly morphing back into the perfect assistant she was. She pressed on her microphone, announcing that I was ready for my presentation.

I definitely needed to get her something to apologize the next day.

"Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen," the MC's voice rang through the speakers, gathering everyone's attention. "My name is Tyler Crowley, and I will be your MC for this evening. I sincerely hope you are all enjoying yourselves. If you would please take your seats." Jasper had joined us beside Rosalie, trailing behind me as Angela led us to the corner of the stage while Tyler waited for everyone to be seated. One of the tech guys handed me a microphone earpiece to put on.

"Thank you," Tyler announced again. "It is with immense pleasure that I present to you the woman who's gathered us here this evening, bringing together people from all around the world. She has single handedly built a multi-billion dollar corporation in a few short years, knocking down every obstacle that has came her way. The astounding technology her corporation has created has launched our Earth on a path of hope, rather than the one of destruction that we've all become accustomed to. Without a doubt, she has given us that hope and made our world a much better place. Ladies and gentlemen, Isabella Swan."

The hall erupted in applause and I drank it in, smiling at Rosalie and Jasper before I walked up the steps to the stage.

This was it. This was me.

This was exactly what I'd worked so hard for, and I was never going to give it up.

"Thank you Tyler, for that wonderful welcome. Though I would love to say that I did this all on my own, I must admit that I did string along a few extra people with me." I winked as the crowd's short chuckling filled the room. "And thank you, every single person in this room, for joining us tonight in celebration of yet another way for us to improve our Earth and its inhabitants. I'd like to take this chance to stress the extreme importance of this project; because of this I've had to hold its contents in complete secrecy. My two colleagues that you are all very well acquainted with, chief financial officer Rosalie Hale and vice president Jasper Hale, have also been completely in the dark. Let me remind you that this is not something that I do very often, creating projects that are confidential from the rest of the company. In fact, the last time I'd done so was when I first created Swan Enterprises; our second project which led our shares and revenue to skyrocket.

So, ladies and gentlemen, it is my extreme pleasure to unveil to you Project Gaia."

The screen behind me lit up, presenting the computerized visuals as I held the remote, clicking away as I smoothly presented Project Gaia effortlessly. Project Gaia was a new innovation that I had created once the tech team of Swan Enterprises invented the technology required for it. In ancient Greek mythology, Gaia was known as the primal Greek goddess personifying the Earth, basically the Greek version of Mother Nature, you could say. The name, as well as the mythology behind it, went well with the entire project.

Project Gaia revolved around creating ways for those living in low poverty to be able to afford the necessities that millions took for granted each and every day. It was by far my greatest accomplishment to date. It was essentially a space, called a Gaia Shell, holding an insane amount of technology, giving users a chance to have those same necessities—shower, food, water and so on. All of this would replenish itself, and the space would gather its energy from the sun, earth and from the oxygen in the air. The way it gathered energy was entirely harmless, and while it would take from the earth it would also emit nutrients back into it as well. Delegates from these countries holding a Gaia Shell would be given packages once the computer sent us its statistics, telling whether it was low on materials or if it required assistance. Thousands would be able to use the Gaia Shell every day, with them entering the space at an extremely low cost and being able to use and take whatever they might need. It was astounding really, the little bit that it would cost would give them back so much more than they had hoped for.

Basically, it was a mall of essential needs for all human beings.

The crowd erupted in applause, standing to their feet once I'd finished the presentation of Project Gaia. Rosalie and Jasper moved to my side, smiling at me before turning back to face our audience.

"In honour of Project Gaia's unveiling, I am throwing in one Gaia Shell for every two purchased at no cost whatsoever."

The roar of the audience became even louder, all in excitement and awe over Project Gaia and my offer. My cheeks were literally starting to hurt from grinning so hard, but I couldn't help it. The reaction I was getting was more than what I'd dreamed of and I could only imagine the benefits it would bring to the millions of people in dire need of it.

My eyes traveled across the room, taking in every single face and their reaction before settling on the one reaction that surprised me the most. Sharp, green eyes were staring back at me, dark and loaded with emotion that was so familiar, yet I couldn't place it. I stared back at Edward, watching as his jaw clenched and teeth grinded against each other before he shook his head sharply and sat back down.

Huh, not exactly what I was hoping for. But, what was I hoping for?

I turned away from my obvious distraction that I _so_ did not need and followed Angela off the stage. Many approached me and shook my hand, offering their thoughts and congratulations, doing the same with Rosalie and Jasper before taking their seats once more.

"Bella, Nigeria just offered to purchase four." Rosalie whispered in my ear. "And India's taking eight. You sly little minx, keeping this from me. Damn, I'm so proud of you right now."

I turned to face her, swallowing down the lump in my throat and winked at her. "Thanks Rose. But this just shows that I've upped myself in our competition."

"Oh, don't kid yourself sweetheart. We both know who's on top." She smirked back and laughed before we were led to our seats.

We were served a delicious dinner and spoke to every person in the room, that was worth speaking to mind you, before the night shortly came to an end. I had luckily avoided the Cullen's for the rest of the night, hoping that they wouldn't realize how obvious I was being, that they were making me more than a little uncomfortable. Hell, I wasn't the same Bella Swan they had grown up with; I never would be again.

Just as Rosalie, Jasper and I began to leave the hall, that whole plan was shot down when I heard Alice's shrieking voice a short distance away.

"Are you kidding me? How could you just forget to register our names? Get your manager on the line, now!"

I was barely focusing on my goodbyes with the other people around me, or Rosalie's subtle pushes to get me out of the door. Rather, I was trying to figure out what was going on with Alice and Carlisle, who was standing next to her with an extremely frustrated and exhausted expression, and fuck me if that didn't make me walk over there myself.

"Carlisle, is everything alright?" I asked, surprising myself when I placed my hand on his bicep.

_Uh, where the hell did the uncomfortable part go?_

Carlisle seemed to be a bit shocked as well but quickly recovered and shook his head. "I'm afraid not, sweetheart. It seems like our hotel suite was given away, and there aren't any other openings."

"Have you checked with other hotels? There are a lot of –"

"I've already checked, all full," A velvety voice interrupted beside me. I didn't even need to turn to see Edward's face, there was no point.

"Bella, this is awful!" Alice cried, her eyes filling with unshed tears. "The stupid moron didn't write down our names for registration, and now we have nowhere to go."

"Alice, calm down," Edward said, "we'll just have to settle for a motel, there's one nearby that has a lot of rooms available. I'll just give them a call."

I watched as Alice's face contorted into an expression of sheer horror and Carlisle shook his head. He just looked so _tired_ and I couldn't just sit back and let Edward bring them to some dirty, New York motel. Carlisle didn't deserve that, and neither did Alice.

Edward, on the other hand…

"That's not necessary, _Edward_." I was hoping he'd caught the way I spat his name out like it was some vile insult. "You're all more than welcome to stay with me."

Cue the jaw drops and wide eyes.

"Bella, are you sure?" Carlisle asked softly and I waved him off.

"There's no way I'm letting you sleep in some filthy, insect infested bed when I have more than enough room at my place." He started to speak again but I stopped him. "Please, I insist."

I still hadn't bothered to look at Edward to see his reaction because it honestly didn't matter to me. Yes, my heart was beating a mile a minute just thinking that Edward would be sleeping in my own home before I thought back to what Rosalie had said to me before.

_So what?_

Carlisle looked at Edward and Alice before turning back to me and nodding his head, "Thank you, Bella."

"There's nothing to thank Carlisle. Did you all drive here?" I asked, wondering if they had their own way back or if they'd ride back in our limo.

"Yeah, Edward drove. Our bags are in his car." Alice said.

_Wait… their bags are in _his_ car?_

Did that mean that Edward lived in New York?

But they just said that they have nowhere to go.

So how could he have his own car here but not have his own place?

I'm sure they saw my confused face but I wasn't able to ask about it before Edward rushed them out.

"Alice, take her number so we know the address. Let's go, it's late." He clipped and walked out with Carlisle who smiled sheepishly at me before leaving.

I narrowed my eyes, staring daggers into his back and gave Alice my number. I was surprised when she reached out and held my hand, squeezing once before letting go.

"Thank you, Bella," she said softly, smiling sadly and then following her family out the door.

I felt someone grip my wrist and I immediately yanked it away, sighing in relief when it was Rosalie.

"Sorry," she said and I waved her off. "Okay, so who in the hell were they? Seriously, that older guy was legit DILF material."

I was pretty sure my face showed complete disgust which made her she back away. "Okay, first of all, that's gross. Carlisle's basically my second father. And second, those were the Cullen's. They're stranded, so I offered for them to stay at my place." She gawked at me, causing me to roll my eyes. "Yeah, I know. But what else was I supposed to do? Carlisle and Alice are basically family."

"Yeah, pretty sure families actually keep in touch with each other, Bella," Rose scoffed.

I shook my head and started walking out with them. "Thanks Rosalie, but I know what I'm doing. Trust me."

"Hey," she held my shoulder and turned me back towards her. I was a little surprised to see her worried expression. "I do trust you, but I do care about you too. I don't want anything to happen to you."

I patted her hand on my shoulder and nodded. "I'll be okay. It's just one night, no big deal." I looked around to call Jasper over but he was nowhere in sight. "Where's Jasper?"

"Oh, don't even ask," Rosalie rolled her eyes and we walked over to the limo. "He's been all googly-eyed since he saw that little pixie looking chick you were talking to. He was lame enough to ask if he was in heaven."

"Has he been drinking?" I quirked my eyebrow and Rosalie's lip curled up in a smirk, giving me my answer. "That's what I thought. Let's hope he doesn't embarrass himself even more."

So much for hoping; Jasper was curled up in a fetal position at the end of the limo when we sat in, passed out like a baby. We had to have our driver and the doorman to his condo help get him out and bring him upstairs. Rosalie was dropped off next, letting me know that she'd drop by my office in the morning to check up on me, which I immediately argued against. Of course, Rosalie was stubborn as hell and wouldn't give it up so I really had no choice but to settle. We were right in front of my place when I heard my phone ring, the number unknown.

"Hello?"

"Hey Bella! We're waiting right out front." Alice answered and I told her I'd be there in a second.

I took a moment to take a few breaths and relax before stepping out of the limo ever so ungracefully. My heel somehow got into a crack and I prepared myself for a hard fall but was instead pulled up against a solid object. Well, more like a solid chest. I really didn't want to look up to see his face because I already knew who my savior was. I felt those familiar sparks shoot through me right when he touched me, causing my past to hit me straight in the face yet again.

"I knew my Bella was in there somewhere," he chuckled, but immediately stopped when I whipped myself out of his arms and stepped away from him.

"I am _not_ your Bella," I snarled, watching as pain etched all over his face. "And I _never_ will be."

With that, I turned and stomped over to the entrance of my building, telling Carlisle and Alice to follow me. Edward had slowly trailed behind, hauling luggage as did Carlisle while Alice, surprisingly, was entirely quiet. I had no doubt that they saw me and Edward's exchange outside, but I didn't even care. It felt like an eternity passed while we waited for the elevator to make it up to my place and I let out a breath that I hadn't even realized I was holding once the doors opened for us.

I showed them their rooms and was about to ask if they needed anything before I heard my phone ring, Charlie's name showing up on the screen.

_Weird_.

I had told my dad about the banquet tonight, and I knew he wouldn't call unless it was really important.

"Hey Dad."

"Don't you dare 'Hey Dad' me, Bella." He growled. _Uh oh_. "Not when you've been deliberately lying to me for years about Renee. You're still supporting her!"

I sighed, rubbing my forehead roughly. "How'd you find out?"

"How'd I find _out_?" I cringed when his voice started to rise, which was never good. "I think the better question here Bella, is why are you doing this? Why do you continue to let Renee off with everything she does?"

"It's kind of hard to explain, Dad…" I trailed off, which only seemed to make him even angrier than before.

"Oh, really? Try me." He chuckled darkly and didn't give me a chance to begin explaining myself before cutting me off. "I can't believe you, Bella. After everything that's happened with her, you still let her walk all over you."

"She said she was going to get help!" I couldn't help but get angry now with how he was treating me like some fucking child. "She's been going to counseling and it's working. I'm helping her get better!"

"For what?" He roared and I almost flinched away from the phone. "Why do you care? Did she care for you when you were left alone in Phoenix for days? Did she care for you when she would break you both physically and mentally? _When_ did she care, Bella?"

"She didn't!" I screamed, walking into my living room and flopping down onto the couch. "She never did, but I wanted her to then and I still do now. I want my mother to care about me!"

My hand flew up to my mouth, stifling a sob and gasp from what I'd just admitted.

There was a brief silence between us, and I could hear him breathing deeply to calm himself down while I kept my tears at bay.

"You need to face the facts, baby girl," Charlie broke the silence, his voice much softer and slightly broken. "She's never going to change. She's never going to be the mother you need, and I wish I could fix this but I _can't_. Nothing can fix this. No counseling, no amount of money, nothing." He let out a deep breath. "I'll call you in the morning, baby girl. I love you."

"I love you too," I whispered shakily and dropped my phone to the table, tensing when I felt the familiar energy surge through me. I turned my head to glance at him over my shoulder. "What do you want?"

"Are you okay?" Edward whispered from behind me.

"You know what?" I snapped and stood up, striding over to stand in front of him and glared straight into his eyes. "No, I'm not. And you know what would make it better? If you would just disappear. But because of your father and sister, that's not going to happen, so for now, you could stop with the pity party and leave me the fuck alone."

With that, I turned on my heel and left him in my living room, entirely alone.


	6. Before The Worst

A/N: Thank you all for your kind words and understanding. They're very much appreciated.  
Special thanks to beegurl13 for making my words pretty.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 6**_

_**Before The Worst**_

_There was a time that we'd stay up all night  
Best friends, yeah talking 'til the daylight  
Took the joys alongside the pain  
With not much to lose but so much to gain_

_Are you hearing me? Cause I don't wanna miss  
That you would drift on memory bliss  
It was Grafton street on a rainy night  
I was down on one knee and you were mine for life_

_We were thinking we would never be apart  
With your name tattooed across my heart  
Oh, who would've thought it would end up like this_

_But everything we talked about is gone  
And the only chance we have of moving on  
Was trying to take it back before it all went wrong_

_Before the worst, before we met  
Before our hearts decided it's time to love again  
Before too late, before too long  
Let'st ry and take it back before it all went wrong_

"Before the Worst" by The Script

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

For the first time in years, I was wide awake before my alarm went off in the morning.

Having been completely restless throughout the night, my thoughts continued to revolve around the spur of events over the last 24 hours: seeing the Cullen's again, my dad finding out that I was supporting Renee behind his back, and the weird attitude coming from Edward.

It was like, one second he couldn't stand to be near me, and the next second he would act as if we were still together. Hell, his comment about still being _his_ Bella irked me to no end—how dare he think that I was his? For fuck's sakes, I hadn't been _his_ for years! To be honest, I had practically convinced myself that I never was his, that he never even really wanted me, considering the way that he'd ended things between us.

Aside from that, the disappointment from Charlie was eating me up inside. There was that small part of me that knew I was making a mistake every time I would help Renee in some way. At the same time, there was a part of me that ached for the motherly love that I never really had. The closest thing that I had to motherly affection was from Esme, and Edward had taken that away from me.

So whenever Renee would call, asking for money most of the time, I would wire it to her. Of course, I wasn't stupid enough to send it to her without asking what it was for which she'd always say it was to help her out, to get her back on her feet, basically. Several months back, I had contacted a rehab facility for her anger and alcoholism which she finally agreed to the month before. The first week she was there, I contacted the facility every day to see how she was dealing with everything. Surprisingly, after the first couple of rough days, she started doing much better. The man I'd spoken with every day that week had insisted that he contact me instead of me having to find a time in my hectic schedule to make the call. So after that initial week, he would leave me voicemails regarding her progress. The scariest thing about those calls were having to hear that she wasn't doing as well as I had hoped, or worse—that she'd quit the program. Thankfully, neither were a problem and for the last three weeks, she had been on the road to a full recovery.

Was it childish for me to believe that she would come back and welcome me into her open arms? Of course, but was it wrong for me to try to get even something close to that? Absolutely not.

I deserved happiness. I wasn't going to sit idly by and wait for everything to come to me—I hadn't done that since I left Forks. If I wanted something, I would go out and get it.

That's what I did with Renee. I wanted a mother—a real, loving mother—so I did everything and anything that I could to help her become that mother. So maybe it was stupid of me, or maybe I just wanted something that could possibly never happen. Either way, I wasn't going to give up on getting the chance to make everything right.

Angela hadn't scheduled in any early meetings after the gala so it gave me the chance to throw in an extra session with my personal trainer, Jacob Black.

Shortly after Swan Enterprises was launched, I realized that my anger issues weren't dissipating anytime soon. In most cases during college, Rosalie was the one that had my back when I was out of line and in times where she wasn't, I wouldn't have to worry about the consequences. People were stupid in college – they didn't think about taking someone to court for assault because they were usually embarrassed or just didn't want to go through the entire process.

In the corporate world, however, the smallest little mishaps could land you with million dollar lawsuits. I couldn't take that chance, regardless, even if I made billions myself. It wasn't the money issue that worried me, it was my reputation.

And that's where Jacob came in. Sure, having an extremely fit, absolutely gorgeous trainer may seem a little bit intimidating to some, but that wasn't anything of the sort with mine and Jacob's relationship. Though Rosalie and Jasper were the only ones who really _knew_ me, Jake was another that I somewhat trusted. The fact that he never tried to hook up with me helped that trust as well. Don't get me wrong, the first time I saw him the only thing I thought about was the possibility of him being the one to finally satisfy me, but those thoughts slowly but surely disappeared. Though I would never have admitted it out loud, it wasn't only his training sessions that comforted me, it was simply him being there during those tough times.

For example, right now was _definitely_ a tough time.

"Whoa, easy there, killer." Jacob laughed, pushing back the sweaty tendrils of dark hair that had fallen over his face. "Any harder and you'll either be punching a whole through the bag, or really messing up your hand."

I pulled my hand back, wincing slightly at the pain from all the force I put into hitting the giant punching back he was holding and took in a deep breath. "I've got a lot on my mind."

"Yeah, no shit." He said sarcastically, gripping his large hands into the bag again when I started whipping my fists at it again. I must've had hit a certain spot again because I immediately recoiled my hand and hissed in pain. "Are you alright?"

I flicked my hand a few times to ease the pain, though it did absolutely nothing and nodded. "Jake, I pay you to train me, not to tend to some little aches." I continued attacking the bag, using my uninjured hand as well as throwing in some kicks as well.

"You always were a frigid bitch. Not surprised you would be even when you're hurt," he said with a smirk.

I looked up at him and tried to stifle my smile. "Fuck you."

"Want to?" He retorted and I rolled my eyes at his antics.

That right there was our relationship. Cold one minute, joking the next. Even though it might have annoyed the shit out of some people, there was really no other way for the both of us.

Jake smiled and shook his head, stepping around the bag to face me and took my injured hand in his large ones. I attempted to pull back but the sharp look he gave me stopped my attempts and I honestly just didn't have the energy to deal with anything else at that point. Once he put pressure on one of my knuckles, I winced in pain, realizing that I definitely had gone a little too far with our session. He began to speak but stopped, raising an eyebrow as he looked over my shoulder. As I turned around, my grin faded into a deep scowl.

"If you're done here, Carlisle would like to speak with you," Edward snapped, spinning around on his heels and storming out of the room.

"Who's the asshole?" Jake asked when I turned back to face him.

"He's not important." I shrugged indifferently, even though Edward's previous curt tone didn't sit well with me. At that point, I wasn't all that sure if I wanted to snap back at him, or if I wanted to ask what was wrong.

_Stupid Bella, who cares what's wrong?_

Jake scoffed and stared at me knowingly. "I beg to differ."

"And I don't care," I said. "Anyways, we'll end early this morning. Same time tomorrow?"

"Whoa, Isabella, there's no way you're having another session tomorrow with that injury," He informed me, pointing towards my aching hand. "You need that to heal before putting any more work into it."

I rolled my eyes, waving my hand at his comment and turning to leave the room. I had only taken a few steps before I felt him grab my wrist, and I instinctively snatched my hand away. The next thing I knew, my forearm was pushing into Jake's throat as I pinned him against the wall. I gasped quietly when I finally came to realize what I'd done and jolted back away from him, moving backwards until I felt the wall behind me.

_No… no, this can't be happening._

"I didn't mean to… I just… I'm sorry…" I rambled, stopping when I heard Jake say my name softly. His face didn't show the anger I'd expected—it looked as if he was genuinely concerned. Seeing an emotion other than anger lingering in his eyes made me tense and straighten back up.

He felt bad for me.

Pity.

I didn't need pity, nor did I want it. Not then, and not now.

"I'll call you when my hand gets better. Have a good day, Jacob." I said brusquely, grabbing a towel and making my way to the kitchen.

I could hear Alice and Carlisle chatting as I dried the sweat from my face, but stopped right in my tracks when I pulled the towel away and was facing Edward again. His eyes were fixated on my injured hand, his expression one that I faintly remembered when we were younger but didn't quite give a shit now to figure out what it meant.

"Bella, what happened?" He asked frantically, taking a step forward to take a better look, but stopping once he realized I was reclining away from him. "Are you alright? What'd he do to you?"

My jaw practically dropped to the floor and I shook my head at him. "You're kidding me, right? Seriously Edward, your mood swings are giving me whiplash."

I figured by not answering his question and basically implying that Jake had hurt me was eating him up inside, but I really couldn't have cared any less. When his jaw tensed and emerald eyes were cold once more, I took it as a sign to continue heading over to Carlisle. Him and Alice seemed to have both woken up shortly before and were sitting by the kitchen island, mugs of steaming hot coffee in their hands.

"Morning, Bella!" Alice chirped, running over and giving me a quick hug. Before I could tell her that she'd probably not want to do that, she pulled away and grimaced. "You're gross."

"Thanks, Alice. That's just what I like to hear," I said and rolled my eyes at her.

Carlisle chuckled and offered me a cup of coffee. "Thank you again for allowing us to stay, Bella. I'll have to apologize for Alice's behaviour this morning. I told her that we'd wait for you to finish up but she was adamant on making coffee."

"It's my liquid energy!" Alice protested, jutting out her bottom lip. "I need it every morning."

"I don't think you need any more energy than you've already got, Alice." Carlisle and I laughed as Alice pretended to be offended, but immediately joined in right after. "Well, I'm sure coffee won't fill us up, so how about I make some breakfast? Omelets sound good?"

Edward walked in sullenly as Carlisle protested that they would help, but I was obviously not going to let him cook for the whole load of us. I didn't mind cooking, it was another thing I was good at. That wasn't really the reason behind it though; I just really wanted to do something for Carlisle and Alice. Though I hadn't exactly realized it the night before, seeing them there made me miss them so much more than I had through the years. I began to regret not keeping in contact with Alice as much as she had with me, and I was even more pissed off that Edward was the reason behind it all.

Carlisle and Alice both asked what I had been up to since I'd left Forks, listening intently to the years they had missed. Carlisle looked at me proudly when I spoke of my graduation at Harvard and the start of Swan Enterprises, but his expression slowly turned sad as I continued. When I finished, the silence was literally deafening.

"Bella," Carlisle sighed and clasped his hands together, "You have no idea how proud I am of you. You've done extremely well for yourself, but I'm sorry, sweetheart, even though I want to be happy for you, I can't get over the fact that you left us so abruptly."

"Dad!" Alice hissed as Edward glared at their father.

"No, Alice. Bella needs to hear this," Carlisle said firmly before looking back at me. "How could you do that, Bella? After all that we'd been through together, how could you just leave us like that without a simple goodbye? Don't you understand how much we loved you, how much we still love you? Esme was heartbroken when you left; she thought of you as her own daughter, for God's sakes!"

Every angry word that left Carlisle's lips was a dagger through my heart. I knew of the pain I had to deal with over the years, but never did I think that my leaving would've had such a strong impact on them. I knew they loved me, I really did, but I was in no way capable of seeing them before I left Forks. I felt without a shadow of a doubt, that if I had seen them one last time, I'd never have been able to leave. Other than Charlie, they were all I had.

"And then we don't even get a phone call from you, not one in these nine years." He continued, ignoring the silent pleas from Alice and death looks from Edward. "We tried so hard to just hear your voice again, but even when you came to see Charlie you seemed to do everything you could to avoid us at all costs. I don't understand, Bella. I don't understand why you would do this to us."

My eyes shot to Edward's when I realized why Carlisle was so much more hurt than I had expected. When his gaze locked with mine, an almost pleading look etched over his face, confirming exactly what I had thought.

_He didn't even have the fucking balls to tell them._

I was definitely not going to let him get away with it.

"Carlisle, I'm sorry for everything. I really am," I said softly, placing my hand on top of his and squeezing gently. "You know that I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you or Esme. The same goes with Alice and Emmett." His eyes held a confused look when I didn't mention Edward. "You've all been there with me through everything, and there really is no way I can thank you enough. It hurts hearing how you really feel and I thank you for telling me this, because if you hadn't then I would've added more to my regret list. But, there's more to it than what you believe."

Alice gasped quietly and Edward's deep breathing filled my ears, but I wouldn't allow him to live this lie. Not when he'd ruined so much for me.

"Carlisle, I left for a reason. I left because of Edward," I informed him as his head turned to face his son. "I walked in on him having sex with another girl the night of our prom."

I wanted to tell him Edward said he'd basically wished Renee had gotten her way with me the day he found me, or that I was tying him down to a relationship he never wanted, but for some reason I just stopped. I didn't have it in me to say those things again because strangely, those words still hurt. It shouldn't have, but I knew that feeling when I had it. Carlisle's eyes narrowed furiously at Edwards and I was suddenly struck with the need to not be there for his wrath.

"I'll be in my bedroom if you need me," I whispered, turning and walking away, but not before hearing the sound of a slap resonating from where they were sitting.

* * *

I get the feeling that this may make readers hate Edward even more... whoops?  
Reviews in my inbox means teasers in yours!


	7. Break Even

A/N: Oh yeah, definitely right on the hating part. Don't junk punch Edward just yet... might want to hold off for now. Just sayin'.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended****

_**Chapter 7**_

_**Break Even**_

_They say bad things happen for a reason__  
__But no wise words gonna stop me bleeding__  
__Coz she's moved on while I'm still grieving__  
__And when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even, no_

_What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?__  
__What am I suppose to say when I'm all choked up and you're OK?__  
__I'm falling to pieces, yeah__  
__I'm falling to pieces, yeah__  
__I'm falling to pieces__  
__I'm falling to pieces_

_You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain__  
__You took your suitcase, I took the blame__  
__Now I'm trying to make sense of what little remains__  
__Coz you left with no love, with no love to my name_

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing__  
__Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in__  
__Coz I got time while she got freedom__  
__Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break even__  
__No it don't break, no it don't break even, no_

"Break Even" by The Script

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

Heading over to the office wasn't the easiest considering my thoughts were completely fucked up from the numerous events that morning.

First, I basically threw Jake to the wall, pretty much mimicking the exact same thing Renee did to me the day she sent me to the hospital.

Following that, Edward had some bi-polar moment, snapping at me one second and then trying to comfort me the next.

Then, to put that delicious fucking cherry on top, not only has Edward made me look like the bad guy all of these years since I'd left Forks and hadn't told anyone why we'd split, but then I completely clam up and give him the easy way out.

Seriously, what in the _hell_ was wrong with me?

Without a doubt, if I had told Carlisle and Alice those exact words he'd said to me the night of our prom, Carlisle would've flipped his shit. Now, I'm pretty sure the only time I'd seen Carlisle pissed was… okay, probably never. He'd always have his fatherly frustration moments with us when they pulled some stupid crap and gotten caught, but that was about it. Now, those moments put quite a bit of fear in us as it was, so just wondering how Carlisle in full blown fury would look made me shudder.

As much as I would have enjoyed that, and I _knew_ I would, I couldn't do it. The best part of the entire situation was that I realized it hurt just thinking about it.

_Did you want something, Isabella?_

_Well, what does it look like? I'm getting a head start._

_I couldn't do that with you dragging along._

_I could've just left Renee to do whatever she wanted to you that day. That way, I would've never been stuck in this situation in the first place._

Just replaying those words in my head had me clutching the end of my desk, gasping for my every breath and trying to will away the pain in my chest. What I never admitted to anyone, most of all myself until now, was that thinking about what Edward said to me that night was one thing that never contributed to my anger issues. Yes, I was angry, but most of all I was so _hurt_. As pitiful as it sounded, those words broke me. Those words broke me to the point where I still had no idea if I could piece myself back together again.

Edward Cullen broke me.

It wasn't me walking in on him fucking Tanya. It wasn't him moving to Stanford. It was him siding with Renee that tore me apart, breaking me into millions of pieces.

I could take Renee's beatings. I would have taken every single punch, kick and slap that she'd give and put myself back together, but I could never do that with what Edward had done to me.

Those feelings and thoughts had been harbored within me for years – I never really found a reason to think about it. I was in a new city, went to a new school, met new people and had an unbelievable career. Of course there were times that the past would come back to me either in my thoughts or dreams, but I'd push them away as quick as I could.

Now? Well, now there wasn't enough energy in me to push them away, but I wasn't planning on giving up anytime soon.

Scratch that – I was never going to give up.

Edward could go fuck himself. Not only was he a selfish bastard, but he was also a pitiful asshole for keeping our break-up a secret from everyone we knew just to make it a little easier on him.

Oh, poor Edward. Well, guess what, Edward? I'll be giving you just what you deserve.

Revenge is a bitch.

But she's _my_ bitch.

"Miss Swan?" Angela's voice sounded from the telephone speaker. "Rosalie and Jasper Hale are here to see you."

"Send them in, Ang," I answered, smiling a real smile for the first time that day when they walked in. "Well if it isn't my two favourite people."

"You don't have to be so nice to her, Bella. We both know I'm your favourite," Jasper cooed, smirking before Rosalie slapped the back of his head. "You're a bitch."

"Tell me something I don't know," Rosalie answered, rolling her eyes and heading over to my sound system. "Mood?"

"Pissed. Exhausted. Fed up," I said.

"Bored. Wanting self-fulfillment," Rosalie said, sparking my own curiosity.

"Sexually frustrated," Jasper added, earning a raised brow from Rosalie and I. "What? It's been a while."

I shook my head at him, stifling my smile as we went through our regular routine. After whatever night Rosalie and I had met, regardless if it was some random party or a corporate event, this was how we'd start off our replays of the night before. We'd start up our music systems, yell out our moods and throw on a playlist set up for it. As soon as Jasper joined the company, he'd joined in as well. It was much easier starting everything off with some good music to set up the mood before actually splurging.

The heavy sounds of guitar and drums filled my office once Rosalie had put it all together. Of course, Muse pretty much fit in with all of our moods.

"Okay, who first?" I asked, definitely not wanting to be the first one myself.

"I keep having the same dream about this short, dark haired angel," Jasper said dreamily, his eyes focused upon a random spot on the ground. "Not only is she gorgeous, but she also gets me so hard, that when I wake up –"

"T M fucking I!" Rosalie hollered, giving me a dirty glare as I laughed at her reaction. "Little brother, you're done. Bella, you're up."

My laughter immediately ceased and eyes widened when I realized that I wasn't really ready to spill just yet. Thankfully, Rosalie caught on and gave her own instead.

"I had an epiphany last night," Rosalie started.

"Did it hurt, Rose? Maybe you should get yourself checked," Jasper chuckled.

"Fuck off before I ruin your chances of ever getting hard over your dream chick again," Rosalie warned as Jasper flinched and shut himself up. "As I was saying before asshat over here interrupted, I had an epiphany. I'm 27 years old and have yet to have had any sort of serious relationship. I want a man – husband material, you know? Not some guy who just wants to fuck me day and night, giving me –"

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Jasper yelled, smacking his hands over his ears and closing his eyes tightly. "If I hear one word about your disgusting sex life, I'm going to hurt all over Bella's office."

"It's been done before," I glared at him, remembering when he thought it'd be a great idea to do birthday shots in my office with us. Except it wasn't his birthday, or anyone's for that matter, and he was the only one in my office.

"Okay, that was just one time!" He defended, causing both Rosalie and I to roll our eyes.

"Yeah, one time too many. It took forever to get the cleaners to get that God awful stench out of my office," I said, my face contorting into a grimace when I was once again reminded of the smell.

Jasper rolled his eyes in dismissal and took a seat in one of my office chairs, looking at me expectantly. Taking the chance to ignore him, I chanced a glance at Rosalie who'd sat down as well and was wearing the same expression.

_So now they choose to act alike. Siblings._

I took in a deep breath, holding it for a couple seconds and letting it out slowly in order to keep myself calm as I started to explain everything to them.

Except it was different this time.

"Before we talk about last night, I might as well bring you both up to speed with everything. I've been holding out on you both, so I apologize," I began, earning an incredulous expression from them both considering I'd never left them in the dark about anything before. "You both know I lived in Forks, Washington, before going to Harvard and that I left on a bad note because of a breakup. I won't lie to you, that's the rated G version of my life back then. I'll just say this now – my past is not exactly something I freely talk about and it's not pretty."

Rosalie and Jasper both nodded their heads in understanding, giving me their full attention.

"I moved back to Forks with my mother when I was nine to live with my dad, her ulterior motive being to finally make things work between them. Or that's what she said, at least. Anyways, Renee wasn't exactly the ideal mother. She was… let's just say she didn't treat me well and we'll leave it at that. I met Edward that day as well, and you could say the rest was fairly simple. I became very close with him and his siblings—we were best friends. Problem was, I was basically in love with the guy and knew he didn't feel the same way. I was seventeen when shit happened between me and Renee, and a few days after that, Edward basically confessed his feelings for me. We were even more inseparable after that, but things changed when college applications came around." I swallowed against the lump in my throat, a little surprised at my emotions skyrocketing when I came back to the time in my life when everything had changed—when I'd changed.

"I always knew I was going to Harvard and figured Edward was too, but he shocked me one night by saying he wasn't. I guess that was when I noticed him slowly slipping away but I was too naïve and in love to think about it much. I just assumed he had a lot on his mind with college and being far from each other, but that we'd work together on it. We always did, but I was stupid and didn't realize that we were never meant for forever, no matter how many times he'd told me. On my prom night when I walked in on him fucking some broad, and then the things he said to me…" I trailed off as my voice cracked, shaking my head and trying to get his voice out of my head. "I left after that, my dad being the only one who knew I was leaving and why. I haven't seen Edward, or any of his family for that matter, since. Until last night."

The silence overwhelmed my office, the only sounds echoing my ears being the heavy thumping of my heart and my deep breaths. It felt like hours had passed until Jasper slammed his fist loudly on my desk, starting both Rosalie and I.

"That motherfucker!" Jasper spat through clenched teeth. "He's a fucking dead man."

Jasper's anger surprised me entirely – he was never really one who showcased his anger very much. It was always him who attempted to calm the rest of us down, and was almost always successful in doing so as well. However, at that moment, I was looking at an entirely different Jasper.

"So, what? He thought he could just show up to the gala and act like nothing happened?" His hands tightened around the arms of his seat, knuckles whitening against skin. "If only I'd known this then, he wouldn't have left alive."

"Jasper!" I gasped in shock.

"He's right, Bella. And if he didn't, I sure as hell would have," Rosalie added calmly, though it was her cool voice that made me nervous. "This part of you, this broken, hurting side, I've never seen it and I know now that I never want to again."

My walls were completely down, no cold demeanor or bitchy persona to keep those away. There was no Isabella Swan, successful CEO and powerful woman to intimidate others. Right at that moment I was just Bella Swan; the girl who had lived with abuse for years, who sacrificed everything she'd ever known for the one she loved, and had then watched as he shattered her entire being into pieces.

With no protective wall or control came shuddering breaths, a tightening throat and bitter, salty tears. My hand instantly rose to my wet cheeks, tears streaming their own tracks for numerous reasons. Not only was I in shock over my loss in control, but I was also mourning once more over everything I had lost those many years ago – so many loved ones and the chance to be genuinely happy.

Edward took away so much from me without even realizing it. Times where I'd cried myself to sleep in my dorm, or refusing guys who reminded me in the smallest ways of him. God, Riley looked and acted absolutely nothing like Edward, but him just calling me 'baby' set me off.

"Bella," Rosalie gasped in disbelief, her first time seeing me cry being that very moment.

I sat motionless in my chair, staring at my pen lying on my desk, knowing that things would only get worse if I saw the pity in her eyes. It was when Rosalie knelt by my side and took my hands in hers that it finally felt so real. Everything that I'd fought so hard to leave as my past was back, leaving me to deal with them once more.

"It'll be okay, Bella. We're here, and we're never going to let him hurt you again," Jasper whispered, kissing the top of my head before wrapping his arms around me.

_But not the warm, comforting arms I ached for._

There was one thing I learned from that moment and from the thoughts and feelings running through me. One thing that brought an emotion back into my life that I thought I'd never have to live with again – fear.

Fear over having Edward so close to me again. Fear over the raging emotions I felt once more.

Most of all, fear knowing that a part of me still loved him, and would never stop.

* * *

See! The girl's not entirely cold, and those walls were meant to be broken, right?  
As always, reviews = teasers!


	8. The Mess I Made

A/N: You guys are amazing, you know that? Last chapter passed the 100 review mark. Sending loads of love your way, all in perfectly wrapped boxes.  
Thanks to beegurl13 for the beta work!

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

**_Chapter 8_**

**_The Mess I Made_**

_Should've kissed you there__  
__I should've held your face__  
__I should've watched those eyes__  
__Instead of run in place__  
__I should've called you out__  
__I should've said your name__  
__I should've turned around__  
__I should've looked again_

_But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made__  
__I 'm staring at the mess I made__  
__I 'm staring at the mess I made__  
__As you turn, you take your heart and walk away_

_Should've held my ground__  
__I could've been redeemed__  
__For every second chance__  
__That changed its mind on me__  
__I should've spoken up__  
__I should've proudly claimed__  
__That oh my head's to blame__  
__For all my heart's mistakes_

_But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made__  
__I 'm staring at the mess I made__  
__I 'm staring at the mess I made__  
__As you turn, you take your heart and walk away_

_And it's you, and it's you__  
__And it's you, and it's you__  
__And it's falling down, as you walk away__  
__And it's on me now, as you go_

"The Mess I Made" by Parachute

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**EPOV**

It wasn't supposed to be this way. The teenage dreams of my future still reigned, but I knew better than to hold on to them.

I couldn't do that to her. I just couldn't.

Bella didn't deserve any of that.

_Fuck_, I was such an idiot. My decisions cost me so much, I didn't even know who I was anymore. My childhood and all of those years growing up revolved around Bella. Once she was really out of my life, and I was sure of it, I did whatever I could to get back on my feet. I'd work everything out and get my life back on track.

If only I knew how fucking hard it would be.

If only I'd known… _Fuck!_

Everything was so fucked up now, everything! I thought it was all over with, that I wouldn't have to face my past or any of my mistakes made back then, but I should've known better. There was no way I could've gotten away with all I had without it coming right back at me. I knew, without a doubt, that I'd deal with seeing Bella again and just get out of there as fast as I could. There was no other way – I had no other choice.

I'm not sure if God was finally getting me to deal with all the bullshit I've dealt first-handedly throughout my life, but that's pretty much what it felt like.

Seeing Bella again… there really were no words. My head was all over the fucking place. Oh, and to just bring everything to the point where it really couldn't get any worse, she had to fucking grow up to be even more beautiful than I'd remembered. Those soft curves just slightly more enhanced, wavy chocolate brown hair fuller than all those years before and still making me itch to just run my fucking fingers through those soft strands. What shocked me the most though were her eyes. They were still those same big, brown orbs with golden flecks and so stunning you could feel yourself fucking drowning in them but they weren't as vibrant as I'd remembered. She just looked so… empty. So lifeless, and fuck me if I couldn't _not_ blame myself for that.

It was my fault, all of it. All of the bullshit Bella must've dealt with after she'd left, and before that even, it was all my fault. I'd accepted that over the years, or thought I had, until I finally saw her. Then I realized that I'd avoided it, and now had come face-to-face with my actions.

I wanted to fix it.

As strange and fucked up as it may have been, I wanted to fucking fix _her_, but she didn't want me, and really, who could blame her? She was always a smart girl – well, smart _woman_ now, I had to admit. It was a little difficult for me to see her as she was now, but I was definitely starting to get it. I mean, I'm pretty sure her basically letting me know that she was completely fucking disgusted of me got through my thick skull.

Again, not that I blamed her. I blamed me.

My revelation of wanting everything 'right' again came right after breakfast with my father, Bella and Alice. After she'd left, and some brutal lashing from my dad and Alice, I realized that it wasn't their disappointment and anger that had me feeling so hollow. It was the fact that Bella could barely even look at me as she told them what I never did.

Maybe… just maybe, Bella wasn't over it. Maybe there was still time.

Maybe I had another chance, and there was definitely no maybe on me finding out.

**~.~**

**BPOV**

Rose and Jasper left a little while after making sure I was alright, letting me know that I could give them a ring and they'd be right over if I needed them. I was completely grateful for having them there for me. Hell, I had no idea what I would've done without them, to be honest.

What they made me finally realize was that I had to get myself back together. This whole situation was entirely what I worked hard _not_ to deal with. I worked my ass off to get where I was, there was no way I was going to let my guard down and of all times _now_.

All it took was some straightening of the shoulders, a mental pep talk and a slight arch of the bitch brow, and Isabella Swan was back and in fucking charge.

With having Project Gaia in full swing meant my workload was almost doubled. Not that I minded, I completely loved it, actually. There was really nothing else I would rather do but to help those who were less fortunate have a better chance at life, because it was obvious that life was nothing to take lightly. With the Project, it was even better than I'd imagined and I couldn't have been more proud of myself.

That feeling was exactly what I needed to get me through the newest bullshit life had dealt me.

The sound of my office phone broke me away from my work, the short ringing letting me know that it was Angela calling through.

"Miss Swan, you have a call from an Alice Cullen. Would you like me to send her through?"

Of course, I wouldn't be able to have any more quiet days now that Alice was around. Letting Angela know to let Alice through, I couldn't help but make note to find out why the Cullen's were even here in the first place.

"Bella!" Alice squealed in typical Alice fashion, which had me smiling as I remembered all of the good times we had when we were younger. "I can't tell you how happy I am knowing that you're _actually_ picking up my calls now!"

"Alice, I –"

"Oh, shush," she interrupted me mid-apologize. "I'm just pulling your leg, sweetie. Anyways, have fun getting rid of me now. It's not like I'm staying at your place or anything."

I laughed at her teasing and shook my head. No matter how many years would pass and how much bullshit we'd face, the friendship between Alice and I would never falter. Hearing her giggling on the other line, getting the biggest and tightest hug from the smallest woman I knew the night before and just realizing that she was in my life again had me in a somber mood. I just hadn't realized how much I missed her. Not to mention how much I needed her throughout these years.

"Bella? Is everything okay?" Alice asked, breaking the silence between us.

"Yeah. Yeah, everything's great, Alice. I was just lost in my head there," I said in my most reassuring tone.

"You're sure?" Alice asked, obviously able to see through me, even if it was through the phone. After I told her again that I was fine, she hesitantly gave in. "Well, I was wondering if big time CEO Bella Swan could manage to spare some time to have lunch with her old best friend today. Whaddya say?"

I wasn't sure if it was the guilt or the real me that agreed, but I couldn't help but regret making that decision in the first place. Seeing her walking out of the elevator on my floor with a beaming smile on her face made that slight regret fade away entirely. Seeing her made me comfortable with feeling like my old self again, even if it was only with Alice. I had to remind myself of my morning, and how much of a fucking rollercoaster it was, so I wouldn't let my wall down again. Comfortable or not, I was not the same person they remembered and I was _not_ letting myself appear weak again.

We ended up going to a nearby Italian restaurant, choosing to walk and indulge ourselves in the amazing weather and fill the time with small talk.

Turns out, Alice's fashion dreams had come true – she'd been all over the world, gathering all of the research and experiences she could to make her ideas one of a kind. From what she told me, it seemed as if it all worked out for her. She was being modest, of course, but I knew quite a bit about her line after one night when I ignored another one of her e-mails and did some searching on my own.

Seriously, the girl had fan pages dedicated to her. There was no need to be modest, but I couldn't have blamed her. It wasn't like I did a lot of boasting on my part about my own successes. My work was a personal succession, and I knew Alice's was her own personal success too. I couldn't hold back my proud smile as she went on about her travels and how in love with her career she was.

I was happy for her – there was no reason not to be. Alice always had big dreams when she was younger and she was hell-bent on keeping them, but I couldn't help but feel a tang of jealousy while listening to her.

Why could Alice have her childhood dreams come true, when mine were so easily shattered?

I had to shake my head to clear those thoughts before I went overboard.

La Tua Cantante was an extremely popular Italian restaurant in New York, but luckily, it wasn't busy enough for me. Many of my business meetings were held here, which prompted the owner, Joey, to always leave a specific table open for me. Today was another day where he came up to welcome me himself before leading both Alice and I to our table.

"Wow, living the fast life much, Bella?" Alice said incredulously as the waiter immediately brought up my favourite bottle of red wine.

"Not really," I shrugged indifferently, thanking the waiter once he finished pouring the wine into our glasses. "Just a valued regular at this place, I guess."

"Valued regular, right," Alice scoffed, her eyes giving away more than she'd expected.

Needing some wine to settle down the nerves left over from earlier, I took a couple sips, eyeing Alice curiously before cutting straight to the case. "Alice, what's this about? I mean, I understand that it's been years since we've seen each other, but I'm getting the feeling that my status is actually bothering you."

Alice immediately shook her head. "No, that's not it at all, Bella."

"Okay, so what is it, then?"

She looked at me sheepishly, twirling her wine around in her glass for a few moments before taking in a deep breath. "I just feel like I don't even know you anymore. I mean, we basically grew up together Bella, and the woman I see now in front of me is nothing like I remember. Yeah, I guess it's because we were kids then, but it's just… everything. Sometimes I think I see the real you in there, but then you have this steel wall in front of you and you just won't let anyone in. Not even me, and it hurts. I can't even recognize the person you've turned into."

I was silently thanking the waiter even more for bringing the wine. It was definitely needed for where this conversation was headed.

"I understand what you're saying Alice, I really do," I began, staring into my wine as I tried to go about explaining things to Alice in the nicest way possible. Swallowing one more gulp, my tone immediately grew firm. "But you have no idea what I went through, none. Let me just make it clear that I don't expect you to feel bad for me after finding out about mine and Edward's breakup this morning. In fact, I don't want you to feel that way at all. I've dealt with everything in my own way, and that's brought me here. I've learned to be stronger so there would be no way that a repeat of the crap I dealt with when I was younger would happen again. Let's be honest here, did you actually believe I'd be the same vulnerable, naïve teenager now?"

"No, of course not," Alice answered quickly.

"So, what's your point, then? You didn't expect me to be the same Bella Swan from Forks, but you're surprised with the person you're seeing now? Why would I have any reason to be that same girl, when all it brought me was endless letdowns and heartache?" I argued, feeling the all-too familiar feeling of anger creeping within me.

"No! God, Bella, you're taking this the wrong way!" She said, reaching over the table and squeezing my hand. A part of me wanted to wrench my hand from her grasp, but a stronger part of me kept it in place, taking in her comfort and even squeezing back a little. "That's not what I meant. I am so, _so_ proud of you. The changes you've made in the world, not to mention this amazing person you've become in the world, how couldn't I be proud of you? I guess I'm just a little upset with seeing this major change between now and the last time I saw you. It's hit me pretty hard.

"I don't want to make you look like a bad person by saying this, because you're not. I get it. You had every reason to leave Forks, but did you really have to disappear off the face of the Earth like that? Was I really that bad of a friend to you that you couldn't even respond to my e-mails? Bella, I'd be happy if you just gave me a simple hi and bye. At least I would've heard from you instead of getting nothing."

As Alice's eyes started to glisten with tears, I sat up from my seat abruptly. She took in a startled gasp as I stood, taking in deep breaths and attempting to control my shaking fingers. Before she could act, I went over to her side and pulled her up from her chair before grabbing her into my arms. There was no hesitation as she immediately wrapped her arms around me, and silently weeping into my shirt. Even in 5 inch Louboutin's, her head just about reached my neck as she settled her head in the crook of it.

I knew my actions had caused more hurt than I had hoped after hearing from Carlisle, and it was eating me up inside. I guess hearing from Carlisle's point of view had me feeling guilty, but seeing Alice almost break down in front of me made me open my eyes to much more than before. At that point, I couldn't really blame Edward all that much. I blamed myself. It was me who didn't e-mail Alice back, or tell Carlisle and Esme that I was leaving, or keep in contact with any one of them.

It was my fault.

It was yet another thing that I managed to screw up.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, swallowing down the lump in my throat. Her arms squeezed my middle as she let out another shuddering breath. "I'm _so_ sorry, Alice. I don't know how, but I'll make it up to you. I promise."

Alice pulled back, laughing softly and wiping the tears from her cheeks. She shook her head as she looked up at me, a guilty expression written all over her face. "Pretty sure we're not even close to even right now. I owe you more than you believe."

Before I could question her cryptic answer, she left for the washroom to freshen up. I set my plans on getting more out of her since she'd now confused me more than ever, but when she came back looking as good as new and started right back into an upbeat conversation, it completely slipped my mind.

The rest of our lunch went by much more smoothly – talking about our careers had us smiling our heads off and reminiscing on old memories that had us in tears from laughing so hard. We were still talking about our childhood years as we walked back to my building. I wanted to introduce Alice to Rosalie and Jasper, which she agreed upon immediately – Alice never did give up on the chance to meet someone new. Hell, I could still remember the first time I met her, she'd asked if we could be best friends.

The memory of my first day in Forks filled my mind as the elevator doors closed, taking us up to my floor and I was immediately hit with another realization.

"Alice, how's Emmett?" I asked abruptly, her eyebrow quirking at my hastiness. "I mean, I haven't heard about him from you or Carlisle since you've been here."

"Oh! Emmett's great!" Alice beamed, her eyes lighting up at the mention of her big brother. "He finished med school, finally. Well, actually that's one of the reasons why we came here. Emmett's actually-"

"Bella?" My head whipped around as the elevator doors opened, my body tingling when it recognized how close it was to Edward's.

Not bothering to hide my shock and anger with him being in my building, I scowled at him. "What are you doing here, Edward?"

"Yes, I was wondering the same thing, _Isabella_" another masculine voice answered as Alice and I walked out onto my floor.

Great, now I had two assholes on my floor.

Demetri didn't bother hiding his blatant ogling as I walked in, as usual. I almost rolled my eyes at him before catching Edward's furious expression. His jaw was flexing and his emerald eyes were darker than usual as he glared at Demetri thinking God knows what.

_Well, well, well. I know that expression oh so well._

Edward Cullen was on the brink of jealousy, and clearly pissed that Demetri was practically undressing me with his eyes right in front of him. And fuck me if I didn't pass up the brilliant opportunity that was right in my face.

"Demetri, so good to see you," I practically purred, smirking at him as seductively as I could as his jaw dropped a bit. "And for what, may I ask, do I have this pleasure?"

Cue the smoke blowing out his ears, because Edward Cullen was on fire.

Shaking his head to probably clear the sinful thoughts he was having, a smug grin lit across his face. "Actually, Isabella, I came here to offer you dinner tonight. My treat."

Well, first time for that considering Demetri never bothered coming into the building to ask me out, rather had his 'people' call me. And what perfect timing he had, coming in when Edward had. Taking one more glance at Edward, his narrowed eyes moving from Demetri's and locking with mine. They widened slightly, almost looking apologetic and… pleading?

I didn't care though – I had enough of Edward's actions running my life.

"Isabella, I really insist," Demetri said, standing over to my side and placing his hand on my waist. Edward's eyes immediately zoned in on where he was touching me, his whole body noticeably tensing before.

"I would love to, Demetri," I said, my eyes remaining on Edward's as they shot up back to mine, looking as broken as I felt.

Revenge is a bitch, Edward Cullen.

It's about time I got mine.

* * *

Who else would like revenge? Please raise your hand so I can see it. What'd you guys think about her giving Demetri a chance now?  
Teasers for the next chapter will be delivered if you review!


	9. Easily

A/N: Thanks for the reviews, subscriptions, and favourites. You're all amazing. And thanks to beegurl13 for the great work on this chapter. My apologies for the lateness.  
Uh, and you also might want to hold onto your socks for this chapter, it's a bit of a rollercoaster. And if you don't have socks... well you may be screwed.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 9**_

_**Easily**_

_I want to touch you deep inside__  
__And find the secrets that you hide__  
__When you fears are cast aside__  
__Will you remember me?_

_Easily forgotten love__  
__Easily forgotten love__  
__It's not so easily_

"Easily" by Muse

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

"Perfect," Demetri said, smiling seductively. "Be ready by seven, my driver will come get you."

I had to stifle my laughter at his antics and his clear presence of raging testosterone. Not only did he try to set the time for our date, but he assumed that I would be riding with him. Poor Demetri, he had no idea what he was getting himself into.

_That's the fun part though,_ I thought.

"Actually, Demetri, that won't be necessary." I raised an eyebrow at him, pulling myself away from his grabby hand on my waist and walking over to Angela's desk. She immediately handed me the latest reports we had received, one in particular that had a note on top regarding a telephone meeting. Keeping my eyes focused on the papers, I replied "I actually have a late meeting so seven won't work for me. I will meet you at whatever restaurant you choose, given I approve first, at eight o'clock."

I turned around and caught Demetri's expression, eyes narrowed and nostrils flaring, moments before he masked it. _That's what I thought._ He smirked and moved to stand in front of me.

"Of course, Isabella. That'll be just fine," he agreed, though I knew he basically thought his balls might as well have shriveled up and fallen off. "I will call your assistant –"

"Angela."

"What?" Demetri asked, confusion written all over his face, and I rolled my eyes at his stupidity.

"Her name is _Angela_, and I would appreciate it if you called her by her name and not by her title as if she's some sort of item. Especially when she's sitting right in front of you," I said firmly, catching Angela's blushing face behind her desk. I wasn't going to tolerate him belittling her, much less in my own damn building.

I really wished I had a camera right at that moment, because it looked as if Demetri's head was going to explode. There was really no need for a scene, and I'm sure he understood that after looking around at his audience's watchful eyes. Like the well-trained prodigy son of Aro Volturi he was, Demetri rolled his shoulders and smiled deviously at Angela.

"My sincere apologies, _Angela_. It won't happen again," Demetri crooned before placing his hands on my hips once more and pulling himself flush with me. A_pparently being a bitch turns him on, how fabulous. _To top off his caveman act, he pressed me into him and snaked a hand down to grab an ass cheek.

Things would've been so much better if Demetri had a muzzle on, or was suddenly stricken and become mute. Seriously, what a waste.

"Tonight, my dear Isabella," he said, pulling my hand to his lips and I ignored the scoff I heard from behind him. "I assure you, you will have a _very_ enjoyable night."

With a wink and smile, Demetri pulled himself away and made his way to the elevator. As soon as the door closed, Alice let out a deep breath.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Bella?" She asked, placing her hands on her petite hips. "That douchebag just oozes trouble!"

"So what?"

"So _what?_" My body immediately tensed at the sound of Edward's furious voice and fingers clenched into fists. "What the fuck is wrong with you, Bella? You're seriously going to go out to dinner with that guy?"

I pushed my anger aside and instead focused on torturing him a bit more. Relaxing my tension, I put on a brazen demeanor to show that there was much more intended for tonight. My lips pulled into a slight smirk, eyebrow raised and my hand travelled down my waist to rest at my hip.

"Who said I was only going out to dinner, Edward?" I asked innocently, tormenting him even more.

As expected, his green eyes darkened in rage and his hands clenched at his side. I grinned at his reaction and continued, adding more fuel to the fire. "Demetri's made it clear that he's more than capable of… _satisfying_ me, you could say. His persistence adds to his charm, so I'll ask again, _so what?_"

Edward's chest rumbled lowly, and lips pursed hesitantly before he suddenly exploded. "So I don't like it! He's a fucking asshole."

"Well, now that makes me pretty curious on what the fuck that makes you!" I retorted, giving up on reigning in my anger. "And who do you think you are for telling me you don't like it? _You?_ Why in the hell would I care what you think, Edward?"

"Because I –" He began to yell but then froze, widening his eyes in shock before stumbling backwards. I had no idea what the hell happened and why the sudden change in demeanor, chancing a look at Alice to get some answers but my confusion only grew when I took in her glossy eyes. Frowning, I took a step towards Alice to comfort her, hoping to figure out what was wrong before Angela softly cleared her throat behind me.

"Um, I'm sorry Miss Swan," she apologized as I turned to face her. "New Haven Rehab is calling, would you like me to take a message?"

_What the hell is Renee's doctor doing calling me for now?_ Dr. Newton and I had specific schedules about when he would contact me on Renee's status at the rehabilitation centre. I had just spoken to him a few days prior and there were still several days to go before he was due to call again.

_Unless something's gone wrong._

"No, send him through. I'll be in my office in a moment," I told her before turning my attention back to Alice. "I'm sorry, Alice. I need to take this call."

"Bella, what's a rehab centre calling you for?" Alice bluntly asked, ignoring my apology.

Blame it on my still present anger or the fact that I still wasn't quite used to having Alice's nosiness in my life again, but I couldn't hold back my snappy answer. "None of your goddamn business, Alice! Jesus, is anything allowed to be private anymore?"

Edward recovered and stepped up for his sister. "Hey, don't speak to –"

"Listen, asshole," I barked, interrupting his almost yelling before he made an even bigger scene. "I want you _out_. You need to get the fuck out of my building before –"

"Before _what?_ Before you make me, Bella? What are you going to do, _hit_ _me?_" He snarled, looking more feral than I had ever seen him. "Then do it!" He shouted. "All it will do is make you the same as your mother!"

A startled gasp left Alice's lips and all the air in my lungs left mine. I could literally feel my body sag as every ounce of my energy left me because of yet another blow from Edward. I wanted to yell at him – scream at him and call him every name in the book. I wanted to strike him, inflict on him whatever physical pain I could manage if I was unable to cause him the same emotional pain he was inflicting on me. No matter how much I tried, I just couldn't bring myself to do any of it.

Edward's face immediately crumpled as did the clear tension in his body. There was so much remorse written on his face, it was almost believable.

"Bella, I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't mean…" His voice softened to just above a whisper, and for a moment, he sounded like the Edward I was once so hopelessly in love with.

I remembered the words he had said to me so many times, so long ago. _I love you baby. Forever and always._

They were only words, all of them, because the Edward standing in front of me was not the Edward I fell in love with. They looked the same – bright, enticing green eyes, tousled copper-toned hair, pouted lips and stunning features—but the Edward I saw now was heartless, cold and _cruel_, the same Edward that had spoken those shattering words to me on the night of our prom. It was the same Edward who left a large part of me empty since that night, having torn it out of me and taken it with him. That part of me would always belong to Edward, whether I liked it or not.

"Get out," I said, hiding my wince at how shaky my voice was. "Just _leave_."

I lowered my gaze, not wanting to show the emotions swimming in my eyes before I left them, returning to my office and shutting the door behind me. As I leaned against it, I held myself together with every ounce of strength I could muster. I wouldn't break down, not again, and definitely not now when I had other things to worry about. A broken sob left my lips, but it was enough for me to get angry at myself for being so weak and vulnerable once more. Bringing my emotions under control was difficult, and it was a few moments before I was able to take in a deep breath and make my way to sit at my desk. With slightly shaky fingers, I picked up the phone and pressed the line. Preparing myself to address Renee's doctor was pointless, because it definitely was _not_ him bickering on the end of the line.

"Stupid, fucking pointless daughter thinks she can put me on hold?" The shrill, furious feminine voice muttered into my ear. "I don't _think _so. I swear, if she doesn't take me off in one –"

"Renee?" I whispered in shock.

"It's _mother_ to you, Isabella," she growled. I hadn't heard her voice in months, and the very sound of it left goosebumps on my skin. "And what the fuck do you think you're doing, putting me on hold?"

"Renee, I –"

"_Mother!_" She screamed, and in that moment I knew there was something very, _very_ wrong. "You came out of me, you brat! How dare you call me by my name!"

"I'm s-sorry," I stuttered, grimacing over how much I resembled my teenage self when I spoke to her. I opened my mouth to continue but was interrupted by her loud cackling.

"You stupid, stupid little girl," Renee choked out through her laughter. "Even after all of these years you still have no backbone. I can still control you even on the fucking _phone!_ How does that feel, miss big shot corporate bitch?" I stayed silent, controlling the rage and disgust for how pathetic I was, realizing my mistake much too late as Renee started yelling once more. "Are you fucking mute? Answer me, Isabella!"

"I don't know what you want me to say to you, Mother."

"Well, how about an apology for sending me to that hell hole. That's a good start," she snapped. "Those stupid doctors thought they fucking knew everything, assholes. Good thing I had one wrapped around my finger, did you know that, Isabella?"

"What are you talking about?" I asked, frowning at the sudden change of conversation. She had willingly gone to rehab which was why I made the arrangements in the first place. She wanted to get better, that's exactly what she had said.

"Doctor Newton was so nice going out of his way by giving you reports on my… _progression_, wasn't he?" Renee chuckled darkly, her emotions jumping all over the place. "It sure was nice when his dick was in my mouth, too."

As I listened to her, everything started to make sense piece by piece. Dr. Newton's adamant request for being the only doctor to look over Renee. Telling me that he would contact me rather than me 'going out of my way' to call him. His cheery voice convincing me that Renee was doing so well and was almost healed of her demons.

_Renee was never getting better. She planned it all out._

"No!" I gasped.

"Oh, _yes!_" I could practically hear the shit eating grin on Renee's face and seeing the manic look in her muddy brown eyes. "He sure liked me screaming that too! Oh, Dr. Newton!"

I pulled the phone away from my ears while she continuously said Dr. Newton's name in an imitation of an orgasm. Pushing down the bile that had arisen from the disgust of the entire situation, I put it back to my ear.

"So you manipulated me?" I couldn't help the growl in my voice.

"Hey! Fix your fucking tone, you little bitch!" Renee snarled, immediately recovering from her previous hysterics. Her emotions were completely out of control, more than I had ever experienced, and it was worrying me. "I only did that to show you that your mommy dearest wasn't going to act like your fucking minions. I do what I want, when I want. That includes no rehab because I _don't_ fucking need it, do you understand me?"

"So why did you go?" I asked emotionlessly, feeling the hope slip away from me.

"Because you wouldn't give me the money I asked for. I had to do something to get you to change your mind. How fucking selfish can you be, Isabella? You're swimming in cash because of _me_! I made you, so whatever you have is _mine_."

"My success is my own, Renee," I retorted without realizing.

"How dare you!" She shrieked loud enough to the point where her voice cracked. "I don't care who you think you are but you are still the same little girl that I taught a lesson to every time you deserved it! You asked for _everything_ you got, Isabella! I swear to God, I'll fucking kill you, do you understand me? I'll kill you!"

Renee was entirely out of control and a danger to herself. I was going to ask her where she was before her voice rang through the phone once more, her tone eerily calm.

"I need money, and you'll give it to me, Isabella. Do you understand me?" She demanded. "Get it to me tonight."

A click resonated through the line as she hung up on me, and I slowly pulled the phone away from my ear. I stared at it in disbelief and horror, every breath leaving my lungs harshly.

In a matter of minutes, my life was not only flipped upside down, but to the point where I had no idea where I stood. Not only did I have to deal with the confusion and fuckery with Edward, not to mention figure out what secrets Alice was holding after her emotional mess today, but now this chaos with Renee was thrown into the mix.

I legitimately believed she was getting better, that Doctor Newton was a genuinely good doctor. I was wrong again – Renee fooled me once more and I fell right into her trap. Charlie was right; my father was always right. Before I could even think about it, my hand went immediately to the phone once more as I called his cell phone. My heart was hammering in my chest and tears filled my eyes over how foolish I was for deceiving my dad. I wanted to apologize – no, _needed_ to apologize for my actions and going behind his back. I whimpered brokenly when his voice mail picked up.

"Dad," I whispered, taking a deep breath to make my voice not sound extremely shaky. "Dad, hi. Um, I just wanted to call to hear your voice. Mostly, to apologize for how terrible of a daughter I was to you. I'm sorry, Daddy. I shouldn't have done what I did, and I realize that now. I just… please, just call me when you can."

I don't know how long I sat at my desk, lost in my own thoughts and memories of my painful past before Angela called through to inform me of my phone meeting on line. At that point, I felt more numb than any amount of alcohol could ever make me, and I answered my phone.

"Miss Swan, how are you doing today?" Jason chirped, his cheerful voice made me want to hurl.

"That's a long story, Jenks. What's your report?"

Jason Jenks was an employee of mine who worked with public relations overseas. The last few months of his had been spent in Afghanistan where our last project, before Project Gaia, had been launched. He was an asset to our public relations department, fully devoted to every job he was given, including where he was stationed now in the country's capital, Kabul.

I tried to listen intently to the information he gave me, but couldn't help but lose focus a few times. My attention was quickly brought back to him when he told me that there had been problems.

"What do you mean by _problems_, Jenks?"

"Miss Swan, the Taliban had been informed of our project and took matters into their own hands," he informed me soberly.

"How, Jenks?" I asked, irritated and nervous over how much damage may have been caused.

"They sent in a suicide bomber," Jenks muttered, sighing. "It can be fixed, but those who were benefiting from the project are rattled. I tried to talk to them, tell them that once things were fixed up they could go back to being provided with our services."

"But?" I demanded firmly when he trailed off.

"But they're not convinced," he answered nervously. "They want more – more security, more convincing."

I let out a frustrated huff. "Okay, and how do we do that?"

"Well, um," Jenks stuttered, hurrying up again when I sighed. "It's not really what _we _can do, per se. More like what _you_ could do, Miss Swan."

"Well, whatever it takes, Jenks. Don't question my dedication," I snapped, pulling out my pen to start writing down the plan he had thought of. "Now, what do I have to do?"

There was a short silence on the line and it took a lot for me to not snap at him again.

"Miss Swan," he finally spoke up. "You need to come to here, to Afghanistan."

"What?"

"Your presence in Kabul and to the Afghani's is the only convincing they need," he continued quickly. "Once they see you here as a living person and they understand that you are committed to helping them, they will have their security. I assure you, that's the only way."

I pinched the bridge of my nose, taking in a deep breath to quell my frustration and nerves. The idea of going to Afghanistan when the Taliban clearly knew about me and our company's projects worried me. Sending in a suicide bomber to eliminate our technology, and throwing the country's citizens into a terrified haze once again was enough to have me freaked out. There was so much going on in my mind that I couldn't make that decision now – I needed to think about it and discuss the precautions first.

"Thank you for your report, Jenks," I told him. "I'll think things through and contact you once any plans have been made."

After bidding his farewell, I was utterly and completely spent. I mentally slapped myself when I remembered that I was to meet Demetri for dinner in a couple hours.

_Fucking hell_. I couldn't help but silently pray to God that no other hurdles would be thrown my way because I really didn't think I could handle any more.

* * *

Hope you held on tight! If not, my apologies. What'd you guys think of this chapter?  
Reviews = teasers!


	10. I'm Gonna Find Another You

A/N: Thanks for the love guys, you're all great. Special thanks to beegurl13 for the beta'ing. You're the best bb. Bella's dress for this chapter is linked up to the profile.  
Many of you complained that it was unrealistic for the events of the last chapter to occur. Trust me, there are bad days then there are bad days on epic proportions, and that's what happened. Consider yourself lucky if you haven't had a day like that.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 10**_

_**I'm Gonna Find Another You**_

_So go on baby__  
__Make your little get away__  
__My pride will keep me company__  
__And you just gave yours all away__  
__Now I'm gonna dress myself for two__  
__Once for me and once for someone new__  
__I'm gonna do some things you wouldn't let me do__  
__Oh I'm gonna find another you_

"I'm Gonna Find Another You" by John Mayer

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**EPOV**

I needed to leave. I had to get the fuck out of there – not just because Bella told me to, but because I was so fucking disgusted with myself that I just had to _go_. I didn't know where, but I didn't care either.

_What was wrong with me?_

I promised myself that I would make things right again. I fucking preached to myself over and over about how I would fix everything. So where the fuck did I get off going and saying the same things to her that had given me nightmares for the years? _Nine goddamn_ _years!_ No matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried, I would never be able to forget the look on Bella's face the night of our prom.

_I never want to see you again, Edward. You're dead to me._

Those beautiful brown eyes of hers that I'd fallen in love with when we were kids were just as empty when she spoke those shattering words to me then as they were now. I was a selfish bastard – I took so much from her. Even when I vowed only hours before not to do it again, I ruined _everything_. I swear to God, my brain and my mouth were not on the same fucking wavelength.

How stupid was I to think that Bella was this entirely different person? I mean, yeah, she was basically the fucking queen of the business industry, but I should've known when I saw her the night before that not everything had changed. Even after all of these years, that strong yet stubborn girl that had me wrapped around her finger was still there. Bella Swan was just hidden behind the massive wall called CEO Isabella Swan.

She'd still bite her bottom lip when she was nervous or thinking hard about something. Her eyes still lit up at the sound of Charlie's name. She still looked adorable when she'd scrunch up her nose in confusion, and then the corner of her lip would quirk up in a grin when she had it all figured out.

Mostly, no matter what, she would always put her family first.

Even when she practically wished I would just drop dead, she never held that against Carlisle or Alice. Fuck, without even hesitating she offered them her home when we lost our hotel booking. Bella still had the biggest, kindest heart – she'd never let my father down. The same went for Esme.

If only I had been as strong as her, none of this would've happened. If it weren't for my fucking guilt and stupid head, things would be so different. I couldn't let my head wander into those scenarios because I was done.

I was done fucking with Bella's life and her heart. She didn't deserve it, and I didn't deserve her.

Not even bothering to wait for the elevator, I opened the emergency exit and bolted down the stairs. I needed to blow off some steam or I ran the risk of taking my anger out on someone else when really I should've been beating myself to a pulp. Halfway down and still livid as fuck, I stopped to catch my breath. Before I knew it, the knuckles on my right hand were bloody and red from pummeling the concrete wall. The pain was excruciating, but it felt good – it felt right. I deserved the pain, all of it. By the time I got to the basement garage, I was drenched in sweat and panting furiously. I practically ran to my Volvo, got in and put the key in the ignition before even closing my door. The tires screeched as I bolted out of the garage, not looking back at the building behind me that held my entire life in it.

I didn't know where I was going, or if I was even going to come back.

**~.~**

**BPOV**

Wishing I had something stronger than a couple ibuprofens, I stood in front of my wardrobe, freshly showered and still in my robe, trying to find an appropriate dress for the delightful night before me.

_Sarcasm, much?_

I was honestly so drained from the day I had experienced. From the guilt trips with Carlisle and Alice, all the crazy fuckery with Edward, and the new overwhelming predicament with my mother, there was nothing more I wanted than to curl up in my bed and sleep it all off. Unfortunately for me, I was stuck being wined and dined by one of the biggest douchebags in New York. If only my plans for epic revenge against Edward didn't kick me right in the ass – hard.

It's not that I regretted seeing Edward as jealous and livid as he was; that was extremely amusing. I just wished I didn't have this enormous weight on my shoulders from all of the events I got hit with in one day. Luckily, I knew my own strength both physically and emotionally, so I was able to hold onto the last bit of it that I had left in order to make it through the rest of the night. I wasn't sure if it'd be enough, but I definitely was hoping it would.

"Ah, perfect," I muttered, pulling out the Herve Leger garment bag and zipping open the front to reveal the gorgeous black cocktail dress hanging from it. The bandage dress shaped out my curves and the sweetheart neckline showed just the right amount of cleavage to keep up with a classy appearance. It was perfect for the night.

After blow drying my hair and styling it so that my curls hung loosely around my face, aside from the top half that was pinned back, I applied a little bit of makeup. I threw on my dress, smirking at my reflection in the mirror and mentally patting myself on the back for looking as good as I did.

_Eat your heart out, Demetri Volturi._

Slipping on a pair of my favourite strappy heels, I grabbed my clutch and made my way out for the night. It was unsettlingly quiet at my condo – I had come home to an empty home after leaving the office. It was strange considering I was used to being the only one at my place, excluding the times when Rosalie or Jasper would come over, and when Jacob would come for our morning trainings. Though only after a day of being with the Cullen's again, it just felt… weird. That empty feeling I had felt after talking to Charlie and realizing how much I missed him just seemed to grow. I hated it. I hated feeling like I was lacking something and it was entirely out of my hands to fix it.

It wasn't exactly that I _couldn't_ fix it, it was more like I didn't know where to go _to_ fix it. I didn't know what was lacking or what was making me feel this way, I just knew I felt lost. I hated feeling vulnerable, it was just one more thing in my life that I had to mask in front of others. I had years of practice doing so – it was just something else to add to my agenda.

I must not have been paying attention when I had come home earlier because I missed the white note sitting on top of my kitchen counter. I chuckled quietly, noticing how even after all of these years, Alice still had the messiest writing ever. We had joked together when we were younger how her writing was perfect for passing notes in class – even if we'd get caught, our teacher couldn't embarrass us by reading it out loud since her writing was barely legible. Luckily for me, years of practice worked in my favour when it came to her chicken scratch.

_Bella,_

_Dad and I are going out for dinner tonight – he wanted us to wait for you to come home so you could join us, but I told him you already had plans. I forgot to mention to you that there was more behind our trip to New York, but it's a surprise. Since you won't see the surprise tonight, the pushy nuisance in me has made it a morning surprise now. You'll get your surprise then._

_And Bella, I'm really sorry. For everything. _

_Have fun tonight,_

_Alice_

Considering I knew my condo was empty and Alice had only mentioned going out for dinner with Carlisle, that meant that Edward was out too. Not that I cared, because I didn't. I was ready to bury all of my memories of Edward over the last couple of days along with the other trash that was in his pile. Not wanting to go through the memory of his hurtful words again, I became extremely curious as to what this 'surprise' was that Alice mentioned. Our lunch together hadn't exactly sparked any ideas about it, so I figured I'd just leave it for the morning. I could wait until then – even if I despised being surprised. I guess the guilt I felt from snapping at Alice earlier and her apology in the note shadowed that fact. I would allow the surprise this time without the frustration that would usually come from it.

My driver was already waiting downstairs, holding the door open for me to step into the black Cadillac. I kept myself busy by going through my Blackberry during the drive – adding more to my agenda including this business with our project in Afghanistan and contacting my lawyer regarding Dr. Newton at New Haven Rehab to figure out what the fuck he was thinking with my mother's situation. As we arrived in front of the restaurant, I threw in an extra note to get information out of the corrupt doctor regarding Renee's health. Her phone call threw me for a loop – her emotions were all over the place, skyrocketing in different directions and bouncing back and forth between them. It wasn't normal, and I was sure as hell it wasn't healthy.

I didn't bother pretending to be surprised when I walked into the lobby of _Bellissima_. I figured Demetri would take me to a restaurant owned by the Volturi's. Anything to charm me, I was sure. I was escorted to a table in a private area of the restaurant and watched as Demetri's eyes noticeably appreciated my body – head to toe. The attention was clearly what I needed to sober me up for the night as I grinned at him when he stood and placed a kiss on the back of my hand.

"_Bellissima_, huh?" I teased, knowing I'd get a cocky comeback from him except I wasn't as sure as I thought.

Demetri kept his eyes locked on mine, void of the leering look that I was so accustomed to with him, and rather filled with some unknown emotion.

"Yes, you definitely are, Isabella," he said gently, pulling my chair back for me to sit in. I had to double check that my jaw wasn't still on the ground when I sat down. I watched him strut to the other side where his seat was and fuck me if I didn't appreciate the view. Demetri was, without a doubt, a gorgeous specimen of a man, but throw him in a crisp black suit and my legs seemed to just prop themselves open on their own accord. A little vulgar, but it was true when I had to force myself to cross my legs.

Rather than letting him realize how he affected me, I figured some more teasing would be in my favour. "What's that, Demetri? I'm sorry, I think I just heard a legitimate compliment from your lips."

A slow grin spread across his face as his haunting blueish-grey eyes darkened, bringing back the Demetri I knew and loathed. "Oh, I'm pretty sure my lips are good for more than _that_. You're not as well acquainted with them as I would like, so here's to a night of getting to know each other."

He placed a glass of champagne in front of me, tipping his towards mine and tapping it against the rim.

"Ah, I agree with you on one thing. I'm not as accustomed to your lips as the rest of the female population of New York City," I retorted with a smile lighting up my face. "Where you're wrong is that tonight will change that. Don't get your hopes up, Volturi."

Demetri chuckled loudly, his musical laughter filling my ears and keeping the smile on my face. "Alright, you win, _Swan_." He quieted down, taking another pull of his champagne before taking the menu's from our waiter and placing mine in front of me. "All jokes aside, I am glad that you joined me tonight. I'll admit my legs were getting a little worn out from running after you. You're a hard woman to catch, Isabella."

Okay, what is this, the fucking Twilight Zone?

"Who said you've caught me?" More laughter left his lips, and I couldn't help but enjoy this new side of Demetri that I had never seen before. "No, really, did I miss something here? Did you leave the self-centered egomaniac in your limo?"

Demetri sank back in his seat and clutched his heart in mock agony. "Break my heart, why don't you?"

"Well, I am a talented woman."

"Cheers to that," he raised his glass for another toast which I gladly cheered to. As the night continued, I was obviously kept on my toes by everything Demetri threw at me. He was delightfully charming, in all of the right ways, and I found myself practically swooning a couple of times. We bantered back and forth, found ourselves lost in heavy discussion about the recent BP oil spill and subtly flirted with one another. It ended up being the perfect distraction from my day, to the point where it was almost unbelievable.

This new side of Demetri was clearly charming my pants off, but I was still hesitant. The main fact being that he was my largest rival's son, which was an obvious conflict of interest, I couldn't find myself to end the night just yet. I was curious about where it could lead us, especially if one simple dinner with him could ease my tension as much as it already had – call it selfish, but I wasn't going to give up so soon.

The night had unfortunately ended before either of us knew it, and Demetri took care of the bill before walking me out. The heat of his hand on the small of my back was hotter than it should've been and I practically had to give my ovaries a pep talk to keep them from exploding. Though it had only been a week since I'd been intimate with Riley, I found a part of myself wanting nothing more than to go home with Demetri. However, a larger part knew that my want was due to the exhausting day I've had and not about needing that kind of release. It took a lot for me to hold myself back, but I was in control, as always. I knew better than to act so impulsively.

"Thank you again for your company tonight, Isabella," Demetri said tenderly as we stopped in front of my car. "I hope I don't sound too forward by saying this, but I sincerely hope we can do this again. I've enjoyed myself tonight with you more than I have had with anyone else. I probably look like a fool by thinking about how glad I am that you kept me chasing you for so long."

"Oh, but you've forgotten. I already mentioned before that you haven't caught me yet, and that still stands. The chase isn't over," I grinned, avoiding his other comments because they were leading into an area that I sure as hell wasn't getting into.

I tensed slightly as Demetri raised his hand and brushed back a few wayward strands of hair before gently running his index finger across my jaw line. "Yet," he muttered before opening my door and wishing me a good night.

Practically frowning the entire way back home, I walked into my silent condo and went straight to my bedroom, eyeing my bed like it were made of gold. After stripping out of my dress and into my pajamas, I snuggled into my covers and let out a deep sigh. I was thoroughly drained but couldn't help the conflicted thoughts going through my mind regarding my time with Demetri. With his last comments, he wasn't exactly insinuating that he may have been interested in some sort of relationship eventually, but I couldn't help but immediately assume that. I made a mental note to keep that in mind, and steer clear of that direction no matter what. Even if I had enjoyed myself with him, I wasn't getting into anything new – my ideologies were firmly put in place, and not even Demetri could get rid of them.

Even if there was nothing more I could want but to make Edward's life a living hell for what he had done to me, I knew that Edward had ruined me for ever having a chance at happiness with another man. No amount of charm or wooing could change that.

As I finally allowed the hot, salty tears to run down my cheeks and onto the pillow, I gave in to the frustration and overwhelming day's events. I cried for my father, having deceived the one person I valued and loved more than anyone else. I cried for the pain of wanting a mother, and for losing the chance of finally having one. Mostly, I cried for myself and for everything that I'd lost. but especially for what I would never be.

I would never be loved enough by another man to make me change my ways and finally in love with another person.

I would always be alone.

* * *

So, what'd you think of the date? Think Demetri's bad news, or just what Bella needs? And what about the EPOV?  
As always, reviews mean teasers!


	11. Fall Away

A/N: Thanks for the love everyone. You're all amazing. And huge thanks go out to beegurl13 for her beta work. If you haven't read any of her fics, you should get on it... seriously.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

**Chapter 11**

**Fall Away**

_You swear you recall nothing at all__  
__That could make you come back down.__  
__You made up your mind to leave it all behind__  
__Now you're forced to fight it out._

_You fall away from your past__  
__But it's following you._

_You left something undone__  
__It's now your rerun__  
__It's the one you can't erase.__  
__You should have made it right,__  
__So you wouldn't have to fight__  
__To put a smile back on your face._

_You fall away from your past__  
__But it's following you.__  
__You fall away._

_Something I've done__  
__That I can't outrun.__  
__Maybe you should wait__  
__Maybe you should run__  
__But there's something you've__  
__Said that can't be undone._

_And you fall away from your past__  
__But it's following you._

"Fall Away" by The Fray

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

The shrill beeping of my alarm clock set off my bitter mood in the morning, my body's clear reaction to needing the rest it never received. I was surprised to wake up at my usual time still weary, considering I would normally be up right before my alarm went off. Clearly the day before had done more than mess with my head – it practically left me physically exhausted. Groaning, I reached over blindly and smacked my hand around until it found the snooze button, then moved back to snuggle into my warm bed.

I found myself struggling to fall asleep, even with how tired I was. As soon as I had woken up, my emotions from the night before came right back to me at full force. Once I closed my eyes, I was lost in a sea of emotions – anger, sadness, emptiness and loss. Anger, of course, was mostly due to all the shit I'd had to deal with once Edward had come back into my life. My anger towards him basically shadowed the anger I had towards Renee's doctor and the shady bullshit he pulled. The reason for feeling loss was all revolving around the confrontation with Renee on the phone.

The sadness and emptiness I was feeling paired together, but they were emotions that I couldn't pinpoint just yet. Without a doubt, I knew that I was upset due to the currently rocky relationship I had with Charlie – I failed my father, and that was something I couldn't bear. Of course, I was sad about failing Renee again, but nothing could shatter me into a million pieces easier than letting Charlie down. He was my rock – the one person who kept me going throughout these years. I knew that it would take quite a bit for me to make it up to him, but I would do whatever it was.

However, I knew that Charlie wasn't the only reason I was feeling so upset. There was more, but again, I couldn't figure out _what_ just yet, and it was irking me to no end. Trying to sort through my thoughts had me even more annoyed, and I ended up throwing my covers off, finally giving up on getting any more sleep.

After brushing my teeth and scowling at my slightly swollen eyes—a faint reminder of the night before—I was about to head over to my gym before I realized Jacob wouldn't be there. "Great," I muttered, wishing I hadn't dismissed him so harshly the day before. A good, long workout could've been a good distraction to my current soap opera of a life, and I clearly wasn't getting that.

I went back to my bedroom and grabbed my phone, sending off a quick text to let Jake know he'd be needed in the morning. Just as I was about to set my phone back down onto my table, I remembered Alice's note from the night before, and her 'surprise' morning. I also had a sinking feeling that my time with Alice and Carlisle was almost at an end. I knew they wouldn't be staying for long – they had eluded to that before – but thinking about them leaving just added to the sadness I was already feeling.

I had a sudden need to start making things right with them, to show them that no matter how abruptly I'd left and no matter how hard it was, I still thought of them often and loved them. It didn't matter how big of a bitch I was in my career. I had enough people following me like puppies because of my status. As much as I may have enjoyed that, I knew that those people would never leave me – there'd always be a willing replacement waiting in the wings. I would never find myself lacking with that group, but what I did find myself lacking in was loved ones. I may have blamed Edward for that, but I could only blame myself for not fixing things when I had the chance right in front of me.

Hastily making my decision, I went through my contact list and clicked on Rosalie's name.

"Swan, I thought we agreed that you're always the early bird," Rosalie answered groggily. "I'm totally okay with not getting the worms for some extra dosing."

"Morning to you too, sunshine," I said sarcastically. "Now get your ass up. I need you at my place in fifteen." I winced as I pulled my phone away from my ear to save it from Rosalie's monster groan. "Seriously Rose, get up."

"But why? I was having the most amazing dream," she whined.

"Oh for the love of…" I muttered under my breath, realizing I was wasting time convincing Rose and changed our call into a three way with Jasper. He picked up after a few rings, grumbling something completely distorted by sleep. "Jasper, get up."

"But why?" he whined.

I suddenly felt the need to call up Rosalie and Jasper's mother and ask her how the hell she raised these two. Just imagining two little blonde tornadoes making a mess and infuriating the hell out me was already gave me a headache.

"What are you, five?" I snapped.

"If I say yes, will you let me go back to sleep?" Jasper mumbled. "You interrupted some solid time with my angel."

"Ew! Jasper, too much information!" Rosalie said, finally sounding much more awake than she had been all morning. "And last time I checked, wet dreams were a sign of puberty. Congratulations, you finally hit it."

"Fuck off," Jasper muttered, grumbling some other crap, though all I understood was "evil bitch."

I was honestly wasting way too much time dealing with the terrible twosome, already having changed into some comfortable sweat pants and a fitted white v-neck t-shirt. What I had planned for the morning didn't include getting dressed up, but rather being comfortable around those I loved.

"Alright you two, let's be serious for a moment," I said, interrupting their monotone grumbling. "I need you both at my place in fifteen. Breakfast's on me, and I want you guys to meet Carlisle and Alice."

There was silence on the other end before some light rustling and Rosalie's gentle voice. "Are you sure you want to do this, Bella?"

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose to hold off the early feeling of my eyes welling up with tears.

"I'm sure," I whispered. "It'd mean a lot to me if you guys could come over."

"Okay," Rosalie let out with a deep breath. "I'll be there soon."

"Ditto," Jasper chimed, promising his quick arrival as well.

I ended the call and quickly made my way to my kitchen, rummaging through the fridge to see what I would be working with. I wasn't that great with making things right, and when I tried I would usually just make a bigger mess of things, so the only idea I had was starting the day off right with a great breakfast. I wanted to fill Carlisle and Alice in with the good of what came out of the last few years, rather than waste time focusing on the heartache I dealt with because of Edward. At the same time, I figured it would be a good time to introduce Rosalie and Jasper to the Cullen's that were here. Like I said, I wanted to make things right and fix broken relationships – this was the only idea I could bank on. I wanted to make it work, and I wanted things to be easier again.

I had all the right ingredients to make my special banana pecan pancakes that I used to make on the weekends with Esme, as well as a platter of various kinds of fruit on the side. Pulling my hair up into a high ponytail, I got to work.

It didn't take too long for me to get everything prepared – I was strong with multitasking, which was always a benefit, especially when it came to cooking. Just as I had put the fruit into the fridge to keep it cool and turned to get ready to put the pancakes on the griddle, I felt two petite hands wrap around my middle.

"Something smells _good_!" Alice exclaimed, giggling against my back before I spun around and wrapped her up in a hug. "Oh, and someone's in a good mood too! What's the occasion?"

I feigned hurt. "Oh, am I not allowed to make my best friend some breakfast?"

"You sure as hell are, sweetie!" she answered, squeezing me back and then moved to sit down by the table. "I'm just trying to figure you out."

I frowned, confused by exactly what she was trying to say. I grabbed the proper utensils out of the drawer before turning to face her. "I don't get what you mean, Alice."

"Well," she said hesitantly, pursing her lips. "It's just weird. I kind of expected you to pull away from us, especially after what happened yesterday in your office, not wake up to this." She motioned towards me and the pancakes, attempting to hold off her somber expression, but to no avail. I quirked my eyebrow at her, wordlessly encouraging her to go on. Alice sighed. "I'm sorry, Bella. I know that I was out of line yesterday – it's none of my business what you have going on. I shouldn't have pried like that."

It was my turn to sigh. "Alice, please, don't." I rubbed my forehead to put some pressure on the headache that just started after Rose and Jasper's phone call, and now dealing with the aftermath of the day before with Alice. "It's not that I don't accept your apology, because I do, but I was out of line too. I shouldn't have flipped out on you like that. I just had a pretty rough day, and my anger sort of has a mind of its own."

Alice was silent, rather than speaking she stared at me observantly. Her gaze was starting to make me feel a little nervous – it was the same one Alice was give me when she'd try to coax me out of a secret when we were kids. As always, Alice would never pull it down until she got whatever it was out of me.

"Okay, what?" I finally asked, irritated with the third degree I was getting.

"I already said that I don't want to pry, and it's none of my business," she quickly rattled off.

I waved her off with my hand, dismissing what she'd said. "Alice, I already said that I was out of line yesterday. I meant it. You're my best friend, Alice," I told her, whispering the last bit before I moved to take a seat beside her. I took both of her hands in mine, squeezing once. "I want to make things right again. The last couple of days have been intense."

Alice rolled her eyes. "More like fucking insane."

"Yeah, that too," I laughed somberly before taking in a deep breath and asking her to tell me what was on her mind.

She was noticeably nervous, frowning at her hands and pursing her lips in hesitation before looking back up at me. "I'm just worried about you, Bella," she said, continuing after taking in my questioning expression. "I mean, I'm always worried about you – that's nothing new – but you bringing up your anger problems has me definitely unsettled. I thought that after Renee left you worked on that."

I frowned. Fucking hell, I didn't mean to bring my anger issues up, especially not with Alice. Sometimes I forgot that I was with someone who knew about my entire past.

"It's nothing you need to worry about, Alice. I'm fine," I said in a clipped tone, making it clear that the topic was dropped. At her upset expression, my expression softened and I sighed. "Listen Alice, last night and this morning had me doing a lot of thinking. What I realize now is that this loss of a connection we've had over the years was my fault." I caught Alice opening her mouth to deny it, most likely. "No, Alice, I'm right. It is my fault. I mean, I was basically in pieces before I left, but I should've at least given you all a proper goodbye. Jesus, or at least just called once in a while. I hurt you all and distanced myself from the few people in my life who I always felt loved by. I was wrong, and I'm sorry."

My heart fell when Alice's eyes filled up with tears, the soft green orbs glistening as they gazed at me. It was then when I truly felt like a monster – I had felt like the victim for so many years, when in reality it was me who was hurting others. Others who treated me like their sister – their daughter. The prickling feeling of my own tears was involuntary. It was my own reaction to coping with my own epiphany. My wall was standing strong, unwilling to be pulled down by my new emotions, but I could sense its struggle. Alice's lip quivered, a broken sob leaving her lips and that's when I quickly pulled her into my arms. Holding her tightly in my embrace, I told her how sorry I was, speaking gently but unable to hold back the cracking of my own voice.

The kitchen was silent except for our broken sobs and sniffles, though we hadn't heard Carlisle come in.

"Bella, you've outdone yourself again. Hey, now, what's going on, girls?" Carlisle's fatherly voice had me almost in a wreck as I closed my eyes tightly, wishing my own father were here with me.

I rubbed Alice's back gently and pulled back, wiping the tear tracks from her cheeks with my fingertips. I gave her a watery smile, which she returned, and then cleared my throat before I addressed Carlisle. "We're just having a long awaited talk, Carlisle."

"Is everything alright?" he asked, a concerned frown etched on his face, and in that moment it was as if I was a teenager again.

_Alice wasn't home from her shopping trip yet, but I couldn't be at home right now. I was scared – Renee had drank a lot, and she had already taken it out on me. I couldn't handle it anymore, I honestly was at the point where I thought she was going to kill me. The look in her eyes was feral, almost murderous. She looked nothing like a mother should, and I was terrified. So, being given a key to the Cullen's home months before, I climbed out my window and down the tree, racing over as fast as I could before Renee could find me._

_I came to an empty home, but even the silence was maddening. Rushing up to Alice's bedroom, I sat with my back to her bed and pulled my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them and sobbing against the radiating pain Renee had caused._

_I must've been crying louder than I'd thought, or Renee's punch to my ear had affected my hearing, because I had no idea Carlisle had walked into Alice's bedroom._

"_Sweetheart, what're you doing here all by yourself?" Carlisle asked as I did everything I could to stop crying. I couldn't have them find out what was going on – Renee would be very, _very_ mad at me, and I couldn't take that chance. When I didn't answer, he crossed the room and plopped down on the ground beside me. "Is everything alright?"_

_I couldn't speak, afraid of what would come out of my mouth, but managed to shake my head in the negative. Carlisle didn't answer, but rather reached around me, pulling me gently into his arms._

"_Shh, Bella," he cooed, rubbing my arm. "Everything will be alright. I'm here. I won't let anything or anyone hurt you."_

The concern on Carlisle's face was like a missile to my wall – I could feel myself crumbling over his gaze and before I could stop myself, I was on my feet and in his arms. My body was practically shaking with sobs as I began falling apart before their eyes, but I could do nothing to prevent it. The foundation that I'd built over the years for this wall to keep others out had taken away my chances of being happy and I hated myself for doing that. Tears streamed down my flushed cheeks as I clung to Carlisle's shirt, closing my eyes against the feeling of his hands rubbing my upper back.

"It's alright, sweetheart," he soothed. "I'm here, Bella. I've got you."

His words both comforted me and sent me into another crying fit, but I managed to pull myself down from my sobs to instead quiet sniffles. When I heard my doorbell ring, I groaned under my breath because I didn't want Rosalie or Jasper to see how big of a mess I was, but luckily Alice was quick to go get it. Actually, it was more like Alice wouldn't give me a chance to even move before she shot out of her seat and raced to the door.

Of course, Rosalie was more prompt than her brother, but the irritation etched on her face had me worried. She walked in exchanging introductions with Alice, properly this time since it wasn't like when they had met shortly at the gala, before stopping in her tracks and staring at me. I waved my hand at her before she fell into a sea of questions, wondering if I was alright and wanting to know who had done this to me so she could hunt them down.

It had happened before—more than once.

"I'm alright, Rose. Trust me," I assured her, pulling myself out of Carlisle's arms and wiping the tears from my face. I introduced her to Carlisle before turning my attention back to her frazzled state. "Okay, what's up with how spazzy you are this morning? I mean, I didn't rush you that much, did I?"

"Ugh, you will not believe the crap I had to deal with on my way here," she groaned, plopping down onto a chair. "This asshole had the nerve to cut me off on my way here. _Twice!_ Can you believe that? _He_ cut _me_ off! Then, he had the decency to blare his speakers when I started yelling at him."

"Shocker," I muttered amusedly, enjoying the fact that some guy out there got Rosalie that good.

"Right?" She exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air. "Who does that? What a d-bag!"

I heard the doorbell ring again. "It's open!" I yelled, saving Alice from making another trip even though she was halfway off of her seat. I was puzzled when I heard two male voices in my hallway once the door was shut. One was definitely Jasper, but the other was so familiar…too familiar. From only hearing the muffled voice, I could hear my heart banging against my ribs, both nervous and excited at the same time.

I spun around, fast enough that it would probably give me whiplash, with a huge smile as my mind finally placed a face to that wonderful voice.

"Emmett?" I squealed.

"Little Swan!" Emmett yelled, pulling me into a hug and swinging me around.

"Angel?" Jasper whispered hoarsely.

"You?" Rosalie exclaimed, pointing furiously at Emmett.

If any of the events before had us in a mess, they were clearly just the eye of the storm.

* * *

Emmett's back! Bet you guys missed him! And what'd you think of that whiplash of an ending?  
Reviews mean teasers!


	12. Breathe

A/N: You're all wonderful, thanks for the many forms of love you leave me. Big thanks and kisses for beegurl13 for her lovely work on this chapter.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

_**Chapter 12**_

_**Breathe**_

_Harness your heart, and be still now.  
Quiet that mind that will wander,  
All sorts of dark alleys._

_Tragedy strikes your self esteem,  
Constantly waiting for an ending,  
To all of this._

_She opens her eyes,  
Suddenly she cries.  
Can we help her, can we help her?  
And she replies._

_You know, I fake it oh so well,  
That God himself can't tell.  
What I mean and why my words are,  
Less than parallel.  
With my feet,  
You ask me what I need.  
And all I really need,  
Is to breathe._

"Breathe" by He Is We

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

So, from the looks of it, Alice was confused, Emmett was grinning like the Cheshire cat himself, Rosalie was fuming, and Jasper was… well, I couldn't tell what Jasper was since I didn't get the chance to figure it out before his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he fainted.

It was actually quite funny. He made that girlish, old Hollywood sigh and fell into Emmett's arms. Emmett clearly had no idea what he was doing once he grabbed a hold of Jasper, looking wide-eyed at me as my jaw was still unhinged. I continued to wonder what the hell had exactly happened, but looking around at the ridiculous situation I was in, I couldn't hold down the laughter bubbling up my throat.

Rosalie's head snapped in my direction. "Does this look fucking funny to you?"

_Uh, whoa?_ There was nothing new with a bitchy Rosalie, but this was a _fuming_ Rosalie staring me down. Best friend or not, that attitude was nothing I'd tolerate.

"Actually, it does," I retorted, quirking my eyebrow at her. "What's your problem?"

"My _problem_? My problem is that I had the rudest encounter on the road today which practically ruined my entire fucking day, and it's all because of this pigheaded asshole!"

She pointed her finger across from me, and I followed the invisible line her finger was leading until my eyes landed right on target.

_Oh, this is so, so good._

"Emmett is the asshole driver?" I asked, tightening my lips together so I wouldn't burst out laughing at the huge clusterfuck we were all in.

"Pigheaded asshole?" Emmett repeated Rosalie's words incredulously before sneering in her direction. "Listen here, little girl –"

"Oh, no he fucking didn't."

Emmett ignored Rose's interruption and Medusa glare. "If you hadn't been so self-absorbed with your damn reflection in the mirror, maybe you wouldn't have a problem driving like a normal human being. Jesus, how much makeup does a woman need? Are you that horrid looking?"

The moment Rosalie's eyes moved from being as wide as saucers to narrow slits, I shot my hands out and grabbed her arms right before she lunged at Emmett. I had to wrap my arms around her torso and weaving my fingers together, trapping her arms at her side.

"Fuck you, asshole!" Rose snarled as I continued to use all of my strength to hold onto her writhing frame.

Emmett smirked sardonically. "No thanks, seems like half of New York already has."

I could feel the heat radiating off of Rosalie and from the looks on the faces of our lovely audience, it was time I mediated this mess.

"Alright, that's enough out of the both of you." I glared at Emmett which melted his angry expression into a guilty one. "_You._ For being a jerk, you get to deal with sleeping beauty over there," I said, jerking my head towards Jasper's snoring body. "And do the dishes. Now please, everyone help yourselves to some breakfast while I tame the beast within Rosalie. Excuse us."

It was quite a feat pulling a psycho Rosalie away from the scene, but rather than have a homicide on my hands, I was willing to take with any bruises she'd leave on my body. Not like it was anything I hadn't dealt with before.

"Alright, what's the deal?" I asked Rose when I finally managed to get her to sit down on my bed and chill out. Her nostrils were still flared and eyes still narrowed, and I swore I could hear her grit her teeth. It wasn't a pretty sight. "I've seen you tell a guy off before, but this is just a whole new level."

"He's an asshole," she spat through her teeth.

I rolled my eyes. "I got that, Rose. You called him that about a million times before he left you speechless. So what's up?"

"Nothing's up," Rosalie scoffed, dismissing me immediately which meant that something was definitely up. I cocked an eyebrow at her, waiting for her to fess up, which made her only scoff again. "Fuck off, Bella. Nothing's up, I mean it. He just caught me on a bad day, what with that phone call of yours this morning. So, _what's up_?"

I rolled my eyes at her blatant attempt at mimicking me, but had no energy to actually come back at her with a witty comeback, and instead just gave up.

"Edward," I sighed, hating the affect his name made on me. "He left."

"Hold on, what do you mean _he left_?" Rosalie asked.

"Exactly that," I sighed, rubbing my forehead with my fingers and closing my eyes as I did. "I don't know where he is, or where he's gone. No one does, apparently. But, you know what? I honestly couldn't care less. Edward being gone is a good thing."

I let out a deep breath and waited for Rosalie to agree with me, but only received silence from her end instead. Opening my eyes, I turned to see her staring at me with a small smirk plastered on her face and one of her perfectly plucked eyebrows raised.

"What?" I snapped, frowning at her expression.

"Oh, nothing," she said nonchalantly, taking a moment to examine her manicured fingernails. "I was just wondering how much you enjoy living in this fucked up fantasy world of yours."

I gritted my teeth together and gave her my own bitchbrow—my expression telling her to continue.

Rose rolled her eyes and sighed. _Bitch_. "Seriously, Bella, ever since the jerk's been back, it's been _Edward this_ and _Edward that_. You can't honestly tell me that you don't care, because you do. No matter what shit he's put you through, you two have history together. The thing that I don't get is why you're denying that you're still hung up on him."

"I am _not_ hung up on him," I hissed. "You have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, really? So now you're implying that I don't know you either?" She snapped back, folding her arms across her chest. "I don't know where the hell you've been for the last three years, but last time I checked, I'm your best friend and therefore know you better than practically anyone else. So don't get bitchy with me because you know I'm right. Man the fuck up, Swan."

I opened my mouth to snap back at her, but frowned when I realized it was pointless. Rosalie was right. _Shocker_.

My silence was enough for Rosalie to continue, this time her voice much softer. "The part that kills me the most is that I get it. I do, Bella. You're one of the few people who know about my past with Royce, so you know I'm not bullshitting you right now."

Another right point by Rosalie. Royce King was the king of all douchebags—he treated Rosalie like complete trash, abusing her both physically and emotionally before she finally got out of the relationship. Problem was, she went back to him too many times and almost lost her life because of it. It was definitely a good thing that he was locked up now.

"Back then, I would've gone back to him in a second if he asked me to. Hell, sometimes even now I wonder if I would. I don't regret being with him because everything I went through in that relationship has made me into the woman I am today. What I do regret is not knowing _why_. Why he put me through what he did, and I know it sounds stupid, but I always wonder if there could be some reason behind it. There's a reason for everything, Bella, but it's our choice to figure it out."

I breathed in deeply and let the breath out of my lungs slowly. Rosalie's explanation to everything had changed things—it changed things a lot. Sure, at this point, any reason Edward gave me would probably only fuel my fire of hatred for him, but it would also give me some sort of closure. At least I would know why. At this point, it could end very well or very badly, though my money was on the latter. Then again, I could never tell when it came to Edward.

His emotions now were all over the place. One moment he would be cold towards me and ignore me, then the next, he'd act so completely normally with me, just like we were when we were kids.

I shook my head against those thoughts. It would never be like when we were kids again. Those days were long gone, and so was that Bella.

"Alright, what's going on in that head of yours?" Rose asked.

"You're right," I muttered at her before narrowing my eyes at her whispered 'duh'. "I don't have the answers to everything, but you're right. I need to know why he did what he did, even if things go to shit because of it. I just don't want to regret it. I mean, what if he really didn't care about me? What if I was just the latest chick to pass his time with?"

Rosalie pursed her lips in thought. "Do you really think that?"

After a short moment, another sigh left my lips as I shook my head. "No…I don't. Damn it, how stupid am I?" I growled, raking my hand through my hair.

Rose laughed dryly. "Just about as stupid as I was, but let's just hope I was the worse out of the two. Now, come on, let's go back and draw on Jasper's face before he wakes up."

We both laughed as she sat up from my bed, coming over and wrapping me up in a hug. "You'll be fine, B. You've made it through hell and back, I have no doubt that you'll make it through this too. You're a fighter, girl."

I blinked back the tingling of tears and cleared my throat, nodding my head before squeezing her once more. We let go of each other and I took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly and ridding the tension with it. I wasn't my usual self, but I didn't expect to be, either. There was clearly too much going on for me to go back to my previous life.

As soon as we walked back into the kitchen, the hushed sounds of intense conversation ceased, which obviously didn't help out with my suspicions. Alice plastered on an entirely innocent face—full, megawatt smile and all—that I had figured out years ago when we were kids. Her cryptic attitude regarding Edward had me on my toes as it was, but walking in and seeing Emmett with the same face didn't make me feel any better.

There was shit brewing, and I definitely needed to figure it out.

Rosalie strutted past Emmett and practically dismissed his presence, instead moving to the cupboard and rummaging through it.

"Lose the grins, you two. I haven't fallen for your tricks before, and I surely won't now," I chided as their smiles morphed into grimaces before addressing Carlisle. "I'm sorry that you had to deal with that, Carlisle. Rosalie apologizes as well, don't you Rose?"

Rosalie's body tensed as she not so gently placed the glass she'd just retrieved from the cupboard on the counter, and I could just imagine her scowl right now. Rosalie Hale did _not_ apologize, regardless of whether she was right or wrong. I watched and bit back a smirk as her shoulders heaved before she spun around and plastered a sickeningly sweet smile on her face.

"I sure do! Sorry about that, Mr. Cullen." I heard Emmett cough back a laugh and the corner of Rosalie's mouth twitched."Won't happen again, scout's honor."

I cleared my throat and was about to correct her when she raised up her ring and pinky finger before Emmett beat me to it.

"You've got the wrong fingers up, sweetheart."

"Oh, really? Well how about this one?" She snapped, pulling back her two fingers and replacing it with her middle finger.

"Emmett, that's enough." Carlisle's voice was firm and immediately had Emmett withdrawing into himself. Regardless of how much bigger Emmett was than his father, Carlisle's stern voice was enough to harness him back. "Rosalie, please call me Carlisle. I understand my son hasn't made the best first impression, however you're both grown adults and should be acting as such."

For the first time in my life, I saw Rosalie lost for words and _blushing_. Fuck me sideways, the woman blushed! She stared back, pink cheeked at him and nodded her head as I gaped at the sight before me.

"Now that that's settled, I believe we have another matter on our hands." Carlisle glanced at our confused expressions before nudging his chin towards an unconscious Jasper. "He's been out for a while now, I'm beginning to become concerned."

"Oh, don't worry. I've got that covered," Rosalie said as she filled the glass with water and walked over to Jasper.

"Um, Rose I don't think that's –"

"What the fuck?"

"A good idea," I sighed, but couldn't help but chuckle at Jasper's incredulous expression. His wavy blonde hair was dripping with water and he wiped at his face. "Morning sunshine."

"Fuck off," he grumbled, struggling to get his drenched body off the floor. "Rosalie, did you fill up a jug or something? Christ, woman, you threw a pool at me!"

Feeling bad for Jasper, I crossed the room and helped him up. Rosalie must've taken her anger at Emmett out on Jasper, considering not only was the glass completely full but it was also filled with cold water. I could feel Jasper shivering and looked over my shoulder to glare at Rosalie, who, though keeping up a cold expression, I could tell felt a little bad for soaking her brother like that.

"Jas, I have some of your clothes in the guest bedroom. How about you change into some warm clothes, yeah?" He sighed, nodding his head as I pushed back some of his hair. "And there are towels in the closet across from the bathroom, you're more than welcome to dry off or even take a hot shower if you'd like."

"Thanks Bella," he mumbled, lowering his eyes to the ground and walking out of the kitchen.

I looked back at Rosalie and cocked an eyebrow, silently communicating with her to follow her brother and apologize. She rolled her eyes and huffed before following him out. I breathed in deeply and let it out slowly, shaking my head at the mess I already had to deal with this morning. I quickly grabbed a mug out of the cupboard, filling it to the brim with coffee. It looked like I was going to need it today.

"So what's crackin, Little Swan? Long time no see," Emmett said, the dimple on his left cheek more evident with the grin plastered on his face.

I swallowed back the lump in my throat and fought back the urge to blame Edward for that. "Sure has, Em. You've missed out on a lot."

"Yeah, tell me about it. Looks like you're some big shot corporate queen or some shit."

"Or some shit," I replied and winked, smiling around my mug as I brought it up to take a sip. God, Columbian coffee must've been what God's drank. I closed my eyes and hummed as the hot liquid went down my throat. When I opened them back, however, I wasn't expecting a somber look on Emmett's face. "What?"

He sighed, and a part of me already knew the reason behind it—the reason why everyone was walking on eggshells when it came to my past. Before he could get a word out, I raised my hand up and stopped him.

"Save it, Emmett," I said firmly. "There's no point in starting something this early."

"Bella, come on, you have to at least let me apologize," he pleaded, looking at me with nothing but sincere compassion in his hazel green eyes.

"_Apologize_?"

Emmett must have had mistaken my incredulous expression for being angry over him apologizing rather than my being in shock for him actually apologizing in the first place. He grimaced and nodded his head.

"Emmett, you have nothing to apologize for," I reassured him.

He shook his head immediately. "No, I do. I should've protected you, Bella." His jaw set tightly and eyes narrowed, not at me but rather at his own disappointment. "You were like my little sister, I saw you just as I saw Alice. Instead of me making sure you were safe, I turned a blind eye towards it all. I fooled myself into thinking you were in safe hands."

"Emmett, there was no way you could've known about Renee. No one did except for Edward."

At the mention of his brother's name, Emmett's lip turned up in a snarl. "Look at how much good that did. He's the one who I trusted to keep you safe, but it turned out I should've worried more about my conniving little brother than your mother."

"Emmett!" Carlisle reprimanded.

"It was my little brother who charmed his way into your life and broke you into pieces," Emmett growled, ignoring Carlisle completely. "He's a sick, twisted asshole and I swore that if I ever saw him again after that night, I'd beat some sense into him. He was heartless, and fucking stupid."

"Emmett, that's _enough_!" Carlisle practically shouted. "I will not tolerate you berating your brother like that."

"Well it's true," Emmett grumbled before sighing when Carlisle glared at him. "Whatever, fine. I'm done."

Oh, but Emmett was definitely _not_ done. He mentioned something about seeing him after that night, but when was 'that night' specifically? I made a mental note to bring that up again… and soon. As of that moment, there was way too much tension to handle, and I made a promise not to let Edward run my life any longer. Not to mention, there was no reason why the rest of the Cullen's should have to deal with the aftermath of Edward's fuck ups. They were innocent in all of this.

"Okay, well then what brings you to my neck of the woods?"

I heard Alice giggle and caught Carlisle's lip twitching as he fought a smile, breaking the tension immediately.

"What?"

Emmett laughed boisterously, making my lips spread out into a beaming smile as the memories of our good times together came flooding back.

"Well, surprise, little swan. Looks like you'll be sharing your woods now."

I frowned in confusion. "Wait, what are you talking about?"

Emmett's face lit up. "I'm staying in New York. Permanently."

**?POV**

They were staring at me. Those little, tiny colored capsules.

How pretty.

They reminded me of beads, like the ones you can make necklaces with.

Pretty, pretty beads. They're always so good to me. They help me—help me pretend. Help me hide the monster.

The monster is me.

But I'm so tired. So, so tired. I'm tired of the mask, and I'm tired of working so hard to holding back the monster. It's so easy to let the real monster out, but it ends badly.

Everything ends badly with the monster.

But the pills, those pretty colorful pills always help. I only need one, and the mask will come, but right now, I don't think I want the mask.

I just want to sleep it all away. The monster wants to hibernate. Yes, I'll do that. One pill helps me sleep for a little bit. I'll just take some more.

Here, I'll shake one out into my palm, and then just two more. But look at all the pretty colors in the case; they'll be all alone without their friends. I'll shake a few more out, just so all the colors stay together. The pretty colors hide the monster—they make the monster pretty too.

I'm so sad, I'm crying. Why am I crying? This is a good thing, I'm making it all better with the pretty beads.

But why? Why should I even bother? I hate this, I hate these beads and I hate this mask and I hate this life.

These are so pretty though, and they look like a rainbow in my hand. I want this rainbow, I'll take them all. I swallow them all, and they go right down, making a rainbow in my stomach.

Finally. I smile, and I cry and I laugh. Now I'm tired. Time for sleep, and time to let the monster hibernate.

Time to finally close my eyes.

Sleep, and we'll be together again.

* * *

Yeah, that ?POV was entirely fucked up. Can you guess who it is?  
Just to clear it up, any questions left in replies will always be responded to. If you're confused, let me know and I'll do my best to get rid of that confusion.

As always, reviews = teasers!

Also, for those who do not have me on their author alerts, I posted a one-shot called A Life Unexpected for FoxyFics, so make sure you check it out!


	13. Exit Wounds

A/N: Uh... yeah, it's been a while. School, work, life - all that lovely stuff. I can't promise regular updates, but I can promise to keep the story going. Thanks for the love for the last chapter, and I know many of you were super confused about the ?POV. The ? is not answered in this chapter, but will be in the following one.

****Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.****

**_Chapter 13_**

_**Exit Wounds**_

_Marks of battle, they still feel raw  
A million pieces of me on the floor  
I'm damaged goods for all to see  
Now who would ever wanna be with me?_

_I've got all the baggage, drink the pills  
Yeah, this is living but without the will  
I'm backing out, I'm shutting down  
You left a hole, when you walked out, yeah_

_I'm falling through the doors of the emergency room  
Can anybody help me with these exit wounds?  
I don't know how much more love this heart can lose  
And I'm dying, dying from the exit wounds_

_Wounds, where they're leaving, the scars you're keeping  
Exit wounds, where they're leaving, the scars you're keeping_

"Exit Wounds" by The Script

**.**

**~.~**

**.**

**BPOV**

"Hold on, you're _what_?" I practically yelled in surprise.

Emmett sighed dramatically and rolled his eyes. "Staying in New York. Come on now, Little Swan, keep up."

"B-but, how? And when?" I stuttered out, clearly in complete surprise.

Carlisle, Emmett and Alice chuckled before sharing a look. I swear, the resemblance between their looks was almost shocking, but I remembered that it had been a while since I'd shared any moments with them. The sheer excitement and life in their eyes had replaced my shock with a smile – one that was both happy for what was to come, but also shadowing the cut I felt from having missed them for so long.

"Well, now that I've finished med school, I had to get started on residency applications," Emmett began. "I kind of set high hopes by applying to Lenox Hill, but that was always my dream placement, you know? So when I was notified that I was accepted, I jumped at the chance."

I quickly shuffled over to him and threw my arms around his torso, as well as I could anyways, hugging him tightly.

"I'm so proud of you Emmett, really. I know you worked hard for Lenox Hill, and it's all paid off."

As we broke away, Emmett's boisterous smile widened even more, showing off those lady killing dimples. "Thanks Bella."

"You mean _Isabella_," Alice muttered quietly to herself, her eyes widening when she realized we'd heard her.

"What?" Emmett's eyebrows scrunched together in confusion, as I practically glared at her.

Now it was Alice's turn to mumble and stutter. "Um, did I say that out loud?"

"Uh, yeah. You did," Emmett replied shortly. Alice looked up at him, plastered on her mega-watt, charming Cullen smile and flapped her long eyelashes. "Nice try, little sister. Get rid of that face. What's going on?"

Alice's face immediately dropped as she hesitated for a few moments, biting her bottom lip as she looked at me apologetically. I raised my eyebrow at her and she sighed loudly.

"Well, you can't blame me!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air. "The only person who called you Isabella was Renee, and substitute teachers. But here, everyone's calling her Miss Swan or _Isabella_! I just don't get it."

_Lovely_. My eyes narrowed at her response but Alice clearly held her ground as she straightened her shoulders and leveled her gaze at me. She had absolutely no right to question something so mediocre, and make it seem like a much bigger deal than it was.

"I've changed, Alice," I replied coolly.

"Yeah, I get that," Alice retorted sarcastically.

"Girls, that's enough. I think that's enough conflict and confrontation for the day, don't you agree?" We both took in a deep breath and sighed at Carlisle's words, nodding in agreement but never breaking eye contact from one another. "Alice, there has been much that we've all missed throughout these years, as has Bella. It's ridiculous to believe that everything we know of each other would be the same after the time that's passed. Bella has grown up, as have the rest of us. And if she would like, we will address her as Isabella as well –"

"No!" I yelled, reaching out and grabbing Carlisle's forearm. Once my mind had caught up with my body, I could feel the heat filling my cheeks. I instantly recoiled and pulled my arm back to my side. "I mean, no. That's just for the office, I prefer for everything there to be formal."

Carlisle watched me with a strange look on his face for a moment before nodding slowly. "As it should be. Now, I understand that we have had a very eventful morning, but I am starving. How about we get things moving before Rosalie and Jasper join us, yes?"

We all nodded in agreement, and I took a moment to gather myself back together. Taking in a deep breath, I threw my loose hair up in a twisted bun and moved to start breakfast back up. As I rounded the kitchen island, Carlisle lightly gripped my forearm. I gasped, mostly in fear for the reaction I always had when I was grabbed in any form, whether it be gentle or rough. It was a defense mechanism that I had embedded in my mind, ever since I was young and went through certain… _events_ with Renee. However, there was no retaliation. Hell, there was no recoil, or jerk. My body was calm, as were my emotions.

"I understand that all of this is uncomfortable for you, Bella," Carlisle said softly. "You've been more than welcoming to all of us, and I thank you extremely. But if this is too much, I want you to tell me. We can find another way around the city, it's fine."

I shook my head before he finished his sentence, and my answer was surprisingly firm and immediate. Carlisle was like a father to me, and I wouldn't project my feelings about Edward on the rest of his family. They were innocent in all of this, it wouldn't be fair to do that to them.

"Of course not, Carlisle. I'm fine."

"Are you?"

My mouth opened to respond, but nothing came out. Carlisle's gaze upon me suddenly became too much, and I had to lower my eyes away from him. I could feel the prickling of tears, and I suppressed the emotions that were pushing at the walls I had built up for so long. Carlisle's fingers were then on my chin, gently tilting my face back up to face him. I clenched my eyes shut at first, knowing that the expression in my eyes would speak volumes, but couldn't do it anymore. As I opened them, I could tell through my blurry vision that Carlisle's face was first filled with anger before it was replaced with sorrow and sympathy.

"Oh, sweetheart," he breathed out before wrapping me up in his arms. Tears that had been hidden for years and years suddenly found a crack through the wall and fell freely. I clutched onto Carlisle tightly, holding onto one of the few people I had missed more than I even knew after I left. All of the suppressed emotions and feelings of sorrow, guilt, and pain saw their way out as he held onto me tightly. "I'm so sorry, Bella. I'm sorry we let you go."

I wanted to tell him that I was the sorry one. That I should have came back, and made it work somehow. I should have told him that I wasn't as strong as everyone thought.

The place had quieted down immediately, with Jasper practically bolting out the door yelling a quick apology and goodbye, not even eating any breakfast and Rosalie following him with a subtle grin on her face. She promised to let me know what was going on when she saw me in the office as she was walking out, but not before she threw Emmett a nasty glare.

Yeah, that was one mess I definitely did not want to dip my fingers in.

The Cullen's apparently had some business to attend to – Emmett was finalizing on some paperwork for his new condo, so they were heading downtown to do so. I couldn't help but be a little disappointed once I realized that once Emmett had his place ready to go, my home would be empty again. Just me and my place, as it had been for years. Now, with seeing them again, the comfort I had once felt from being in my own place was now seen as something lonely and unwanted.

Though I was physically and mentally drained from the events prior in the day, there was much to be done in the office. The biggest concern was the entire fiasco going on with one of our stations in Afghanistan that had been attacked. I received more information regarding it, mainly the fact that it was highly recommended that I should not be informed, but Jenks knew better than to keep me out of the loop.

After sharing a brief hello with Angela once I'd walked in, she'd informed me that there was a package dropped off for me in my office. Confused, yet a little excited, I thanked her and opened my door to see the surprise. Sitting on top of my desk was possibly the biggest bouquet of yellow roses I had ever seen. Clearly someone had gone a little overboard on being extravagant, and I could only think of one person who would do so.

Demetri_._

As I plucked the card out of the bouquet, my assumptions were clearly right.

_My dearest Isabella,_

_Thank you for the lovely night. I must admit, I feel blessed to have shared it with such an angel. I sincerely hope we can share more nights together._

_Yours only, Demetri._

As I suppressed the urge to vomit a little bit, I couldn't help but to laugh out loud at his blatant suggestion that we would be spending more nights together. Not time, _nights_. A little too much, a little too soon.

"Men," I sighed to myself. And they still call them the greater of the species, why? I reached over to grab my phone and connected to Angela, who picked up immediately after the first ring went through. "Angela, send over a thank you to Demetri Volturi, would you? Just tell him thank you for the flowers, and that his request will be looked at, but there are definitely no promises."

Of course, you had to play the game a little with players as high class as Demetri. I decided right there and then that I would consider his offer. Maybe he'd be the one who would help out with how consistently unsatisfied I was, but there would be no rushing whatsoever. I would make Demetri want me more than any other woman he'd ever wanted. Hell, I'd have him begging, and I knew that moment was on its way.

The day passed rather quickly considering the workload I had. By the end of it, I was stressed, irritated, and extremely on edge. Angela knew so, and thankfully said nothing of it as I barked at her when she'd rang through.

"Jason Jenks is on hold, Miss Swan."

"What's going on Jason?"

His reply was urgent and almost breathless. "Miss Swan, I'm very sorry but there have been no changes. Everything is very hostile still, and the people here in Afghanistan aren't convinced yet. I've tried absolutely everything but there's nothing that I can personally do."

Letting out a deep breath, I slumped back into my chair and pinched the bridge of my nose. "Alright, so the suggestion now is that I come to Kabul myself and do what exactly?"

"Some sort of public speaking, or along those lines. I assure you that there will be endless amounts of security and that your safety is our main priority."

"That's where you're wrong, Jason," I frowned. "The success of the program is our main priority, the rest is meaningless at this point."

The other end was silent for a few moments before Jenks spoke again. "Miss Swan, I highly recommend against that."

"Did I _ask_ you for your opinion? Of course not, so do as I say Jason unless you're reconsidering your position with Swan Enterprises," I seethed. He stuttered out an apology, but I was way past the point of understanding.

I sighed and almost wished I had never accepted the call, but it was much too important to dismiss. Everything had escalated much more than I had expected, and there was so much more to think about now that there were no other options available. I was just so drained from the busy day and would rather take care of it later, something that was an entirely new concept for me. Moments away from dismissing Jenks, Angela buzzed through my line.

"Miss Swan, I'm sorry for disturbing you, but your father is on the phone. He says it's urgent."

My heart rate picked up slightly, both nervous over talking to my father after hearing his disappointment over helping Renee, and worried because he _never_ called me at work. Ever.

Something wasn't right.

"Give me a moment, Angela," I informed her before addressing Jenks. "Listen, I can't discuss this matter at this very moment, Jenks. We will discuss this again tomorrow night, my decision will be final then. Make any proper arrangements until then."

"Yes, Miss Swan. Of course," he replied before I switched the line over.

"Um, hey Dad," I stuttered. God, I _never_ stuttered, that's how nervous I was. Then again I figured I had every right to be after things were left off at our last conversation. To say my father was unimpressed with me would be the understatement of the century. "Is everything okay?"

I heard his deep sigh on the other end, and my skin prickled with dread. No, something definitely wasn't right.

"Not at all," he finally answered after the longest few seconds of my life, and I swallowed down the ball of anxiety in my throat. "Bella, we need to talk. And you should probably sit down for this."

* * *

Brutal cliffie. I'm horrible, I know. What do you think is going on? Let me know your thoughts, and I'll throw a pretty teaser your way!


End file.
